The Philosophers' Football Match
Encyclopedia
The Philosophers' Football Match is a Monty Python
sketch
depicting a football
match in the Olympiastadion
at the 1972 Munich Olympics
between philosophers
representing Greece
and Germany
. Starring in the sketch are Archimedes (John Cleese
), Socrates (Eric Idle
), Hegel (Graham Chapman
), Nietzsche (Michael Palin
), Marx (Terry Jones
) and Kant (Terry Gilliam
).
Confucius
is the referee and keeps times with an hourglass
. Thomas Aquinas
and St. Augustine
(sporting halo
es) serve as linesmen. The German manager
is Martin Luther
. As play begins, the philosophers ponder their theories while walking on the pitch in circles. Franz Beckenbauer
, the sole genuine footballer on the pitch and a "surprise inclusion" in the German team, is left more than a little confused.
The sketch was performed in the Grünwalder Stadion
. It originally featured in the second Monty Python's Fliegender Zirkus
episode and was later included in Monty Python Live at the Hollywood Bowl (1982)
.
after claiming that Confucius has no free will
. Confucius he say "Name go in book". In the second half Karl Marx
replaces Ludwig Wittgenstein
, but does nothing to advance the game. With just over a minute of the match remaining Archimedes cries out "Eureka
!", takes the first kick of the ball and rushes towards the German goal. Socrates scores the only goal of the match in a diving header off a cross from Archimedes. As the sketch closes, the Germans dispute the call; "Hegel is arguing that the reality
is merely an a priori
adjunct of non-naturalistic ethics, Kant via the categorical imperative
is holding that ontologically
it exists only in the imagination, and Marx is claiming it was offside
."
(Wittgenstein was, of course, Austria
n.)
This tongue-in-cheek re-staging – on a real London pitch – of the original sketch, was the idea of The Philosophy Shop, a specialist provider of education and training for primary school children. The group works to enable Philosophy
graduates at University level to conduct practical philosophy sessions for children aged 5 to 11 as part of a drive to boost their reasoning skills from their first days in the school environment.
Philosophers A.C. Grayling and Former England Manager Graham Taylor had been appointed as managers for the event, and players included comedians Mark Steel
, Tony Hawks
, Arthur Smith
and Ariane Sherine
, as well as philosophers Julian Baggini
, Nigel Warburton
, Simon Glendinning
, Stephen Law
, Angie Hobbs
and Mark Vernon
, plus other academics from Universities nationwide. Match supporters included sociologist and Radio 4 Thinking Allowed presenter Laurie Taylor, the BBC’s John Humphrys
and educationalist and author Anthony Seldon
.
Monty Python
Monty Python was a British surreal comedy group who created their influential Monty Python's Flying Circus, a British television comedy sketch show that first aired on the BBC on 5 October 1969. Forty-five episodes were made over four series...
sketch
Sketch comedy
A sketch comedy consists of a series of short comedy scenes or vignettes, called "sketches," commonly between one and ten minutes long. Such sketches are performed by a group of comic actors or comedians, either on stage or through an audio and/or visual medium such as broadcasting...
depicting a football
Football (soccer)
Association football, more commonly known as football or soccer, is a sport played between two teams of eleven players with a spherical ball...
match in the Olympiastadion
Olympic Stadium (Munich)
Olympiastadion is a stadium located in Munich, Germany. Situated at the heart of the Olympiapark München in northern Munich, the stadium was built as the main venue for the 1972 Summer Olympics....
at the 1972 Munich Olympics
1972 Summer Olympics
The 1972 Summer Olympics, officially known as the Games of the XX Olympiad, were an international multi-sport event held in Munich, West Germany, from August 26 to September 11, 1972....
between philosophers
Philosophy
Philosophy is the study of general and fundamental problems, such as those connected with existence, knowledge, values, reason, mind, and language. Philosophy is distinguished from other ways of addressing such problems by its critical, generally systematic approach and its reliance on rational...
representing Greece
Greece national football team
The Greece national football team represents Greece in association football and is controlled by the Hellenic Football Federation, the governing body for football in Greece. Greece's home ground is Karaiskakis Stadium in Piraeus and their head coach is Fernando Santos...
and Germany
Germany national football team
The Germany national football team is the football team that has represented Germany in international competition since 1908. It is governed by the German Football Association , which was founded in 1900....
. Starring in the sketch are Archimedes (John Cleese
John Cleese
John Marwood Cleese is an English actor, comedian, writer, and film producer. He achieved success at the Edinburgh Festival Fringe and as a scriptwriter and performer on The Frost Report...
), Socrates (Eric Idle
Eric Idle
Eric Idle is an English comedian, actor, author, singer, writer, and comedic composer. He was as a member of the British comedy group Monty Python, a member of the The Rutles on Saturday Night Live and author of the play, Spamalot....
), Hegel (Graham Chapman
Graham Chapman
Graham Arthur Chapman was a British comedian, physician, writer, actor, and one of the six members of the Monty Python comedy troupe.-Early life and education:...
), Nietzsche (Michael Palin
Michael Palin
Michael Edward Palin, CBE FRGS is an English comedian, actor, writer and television presenter best known for being one of the members of the comedy group Monty Python and for his travel documentaries....
), Marx (Terry Jones
Terry Jones
Terence Graham Parry Jones is a Welsh comedian, screenwriter, actor, film director, children's author, popular historian, political commentator, and TV documentary host. He is best known as a member of the Monty Python comedy team....
) and Kant (Terry Gilliam
Terry Gilliam
Terrence Vance "Terry" Gilliam is an American-born British screenwriter, film director, animator, actor and member of the Monty Python comedy troupe. Gilliam is also known for directing several films, including Brazil , The Adventures of Baron Munchausen , The Fisher King , and 12 Monkeys...
).
Confucius
Confucius
Confucius , literally "Master Kong", was a Chinese thinker and social philosopher of the Spring and Autumn Period....
is the referee and keeps times with an hourglass
Hourglass
An hourglass measures the passage of a few minutes or an hour of time. It has two connected vertical glass bulbs allowing a regulated trickle of material from the top to the bottom. Once the top bulb is empty, it can be inverted to begin timing again. The name hourglass comes from historically...
. Thomas Aquinas
Thomas Aquinas
Thomas Aquinas, O.P. , also Thomas of Aquin or Aquino, was an Italian Dominican priest of the Catholic Church, and an immensely influential philosopher and theologian in the tradition of scholasticism, known as Doctor Angelicus, Doctor Communis, or Doctor Universalis...
and St. Augustine
Augustine of Hippo
Augustine of Hippo , also known as Augustine, St. Augustine, St. Austin, St. Augoustinos, Blessed Augustine, or St. Augustine the Blessed, was Bishop of Hippo Regius . He was a Latin-speaking philosopher and theologian who lived in the Roman Africa Province...
(sporting halo
Halo (religious iconography)
A halo is a ring of light that surrounds a person in art. They have been used in the iconography of many religions to indicate holy or sacred figures, and have at various periods also been used in images of rulers or heroes...
es) serve as linesmen. The German manager
Coach (sport)
In sports, a coach is an individual involved in the direction, instruction and training of the operations of a sports team or of individual sportspeople.-Staff:...
is Martin Luther
Martin Luther
Martin Luther was a German priest, professor of theology and iconic figure of the Protestant Reformation. He strongly disputed the claim that freedom from God's punishment for sin could be purchased with money. He confronted indulgence salesman Johann Tetzel with his Ninety-Five Theses in 1517...
. As play begins, the philosophers ponder their theories while walking on the pitch in circles. Franz Beckenbauer
Franz Beckenbauer
Franz Anton Beckenbauer is a German football coach, manager, and former player, nicknamed Der Kaiser because of his elegant style, his leadership, his first name "Franz" , and his dominance on the football pitch...
, the sole genuine footballer on the pitch and a "surprise inclusion" in the German team, is left more than a little confused.
The sketch was performed in the Grünwalder Stadion
Grünwalder Stadion
The Städtisches Stadion an der Grünwalder Straße is a multi-purpose stadium in Munich, Germany. It was built by 1860 Munich in 1911 and was the home ground for TSV 1860 München until 1995. Local rival FC Bayern Munich also played in the stadium from 1926 until 1972, when they moved to the new...
. It originally featured in the second Monty Python's Fliegender Zirkus
Monty Python's Fliegender Zirkus
Monty Python's Fliegender Zirkus consisted of two 45-minute Monty Python German television comedy specials produced by WDR for West German television...
episode and was later included in Monty Python Live at the Hollywood Bowl (1982)
Monty Python Live at the Hollywood Bowl
Monty Python Live at the Hollywood Bowl is a 1982 concert film in which the Monty Python team perform many of their greatest sketches at the Hollywood Bowl. The show also included filmed inserts which were mostly taken from two Monty Python specials, Monty Python's Fliegender Zirkus, which had been...
.
Outcome
Nietzsche receives a yellow cardMisconduct (football)
Misconduct in association football is any conduct by a player that is deemed by the referee to warrant a disciplinary sanction in accordance with Law 12 of the Laws of the Game. Misconduct may occur at any time, including when the ball is out of play, during half-time and before and after the...
after claiming that Confucius has no free will
Free will
"To make my own decisions whether I am successful or not due to uncontrollable forces" -Troy MorrisonA pragmatic definition of free willFree will is the ability of agents to make choices free from certain kinds of constraints. The existence of free will and its exact nature and definition have long...
. Confucius he say "Name go in book". In the second half Karl Marx
Karl Marx
Karl Heinrich Marx was a German philosopher, economist, sociologist, historian, journalist, and revolutionary socialist. His ideas played a significant role in the development of social science and the socialist political movement...
replaces Ludwig Wittgenstein
Ludwig Wittgenstein
Ludwig Josef Johann Wittgenstein was an Austrian philosopher who worked primarily in logic, the philosophy of mathematics, the philosophy of mind, and the philosophy of language. He was professor in philosophy at the University of Cambridge from 1939 until 1947...
, but does nothing to advance the game. With just over a minute of the match remaining Archimedes cries out "Eureka
Eureka (word)
"Eureka" is an interjection used to celebrate a discovery, a transliteration of a word attributed to Archimedes.-Etymology:The word comes from ancient Greek εὕρηκα heúrēka "I have found ", which is the 1st person singular perfect indicative active of the verb heuriskō "I find"...
!", takes the first kick of the ball and rushes towards the German goal. Socrates scores the only goal of the match in a diving header off a cross from Archimedes. As the sketch closes, the Germans dispute the call; "Hegel is arguing that the reality
Reality
In philosophy, reality is the state of things as they actually exist, rather than as they may appear or might be imagined. In a wider definition, reality includes everything that is and has been, whether or not it is observable or comprehensible...
is merely an a priori
A priori and a posteriori (philosophy)
The terms a priori and a posteriori are used in philosophy to distinguish two types of knowledge, justifications or arguments...
adjunct of non-naturalistic ethics, Kant via the categorical imperative
Categorical imperative
The Categorical Imperative is the central philosophical concept in the moral philosophy of Immanuel Kant, as well as modern deontological ethics...
is holding that ontologically
Deontological ethics
Deontological ethics or deontology is the normative ethical position that judges the morality of an action based on the action's adherence to a rule or rules. It is sometimes described as "duty" or "obligation" or "rule" -based ethics, because rules "bind you to your duty"...
it exists only in the imagination, and Marx is claiming it was offside
Offside (football)
Offside is a law in football which states that if a player is in an offside position when the ball is touched or played by a teammate, he may not become actively involved in the play...
."
Line-ups
The names of the Greek philosophers in the line-up are displayed in German in the sketch.| Germany Germany national football team The Germany national football team is the football team that has represented Germany in international competition since 1908. It is governed by the German Football Association , which was founded in 1900.... |
Greece Greece national football team The Greece national football team represents Greece in association football and is controlled by the Hellenic Football Federation, the governing body for football in Greece. Greece's home ground is Karaiskakis Stadium in Piraeus and their head coach is Fernando Santos... |
|---|---|
| Gottfried Leibniz Gottfried Leibniz Gottfried Wilhelm Leibniz was a German philosopher and mathematician. He wrote in different languages, primarily in Latin , French and German .... (goalkeeper) |
Plato Plato Plato , was a Classical Greek philosopher, mathematician, student of Socrates, writer of philosophical dialogues, and founder of the Academy in Athens, the first institution of higher learning in the Western world. Along with his mentor, Socrates, and his student, Aristotle, Plato helped to lay the... (goalkeeper) |
| Immanuel Kant Immanuel Kant Immanuel Kant was a German philosopher from Königsberg , researching, lecturing and writing on philosophy and anthropology at the end of the 18th Century Enlightenment.... |
Epictetus Epictetus Epictetus was a Greek sage and Stoic philosopher. He was born a slave at Hierapolis, Phrygia , and lived in Rome until banishment when he went to Nicopolis in northwestern Greece where he lived the rest of his life. His teachings were noted down and published by his pupil Arrian in his Discourses... |
| Georg "Nobby" Hegel Georg Wilhelm Friedrich Hegel Georg Wilhelm Friedrich Hegel was a German philosopher, one of the creators of German Idealism. His historicist and idealist account of reality as a whole revolutionized European philosophy and was an important precursor to Continental philosophy and Marxism.Hegel developed a comprehensive... (capt) |
Aristotle Aristotle Aristotle was a Greek philosopher and polymath, a student of Plato and teacher of Alexander the Great. His writings cover many subjects, including physics, metaphysics, poetry, theater, music, logic, rhetoric, linguistics, politics, government, ethics, biology, and zoology... |
| Arthur Schopenhauer Arthur Schopenhauer Arthur Schopenhauer was a German philosopher known for his pessimism and philosophical clarity. At age 25, he published his doctoral dissertation, On the Fourfold Root of the Principle of Sufficient Reason, which examined the four separate manifestations of reason in the phenomenal... |
"Chopper" Sophocles Sophocles Sophocles is one of three ancient Greek tragedians whose plays have survived. His first plays were written later than those of Aeschylus, and earlier than or contemporary with those of Euripides... |
| Friedrich Schelling Friedrich Wilhelm Joseph Schelling Friedrich Wilhelm Joseph Schelling , later von Schelling, was a German philosopher. Standard histories of philosophy make him the midpoint in the development of German idealism, situating him between Fichte, his mentor prior to 1800, and Hegel, his former university roommate and erstwhile friend... |
Empedocles Empedocles Empedocles was a Greek pre-Socratic philosopher and a citizen of Agrigentum, a Greek city in Sicily. Empedocles' philosophy is best known for being the originator of the cosmogenic theory of the four Classical elements... of Acragas Agrigento Agrigento , is a city on the southern coast of Sicily, Italy, and capital of the province of Agrigento. It is renowned as the site of the ancient Greek city of Akragas , one of the leading cities of Magna Graecia during the golden... |
| Franz Beckenbauer Franz Beckenbauer Franz Anton Beckenbauer is a German football coach, manager, and former player, nicknamed Der Kaiser because of his elegant style, his leadership, his first name "Franz" , and his dominance on the football pitch... |
Plotinus Plotinus Plotinus was a major philosopher of the ancient world. In his system of theory there are the three principles: the One, the Intellect, and the Soul. His teacher was Ammonius Saccas and he is of the Platonic tradition... |
| Karl Jaspers Karl Jaspers Karl Theodor Jaspers was a German psychiatrist and philosopher who had a strong influence on modern theology, psychiatry and philosophy. After being trained in and practicing psychiatry, Jaspers turned to philosophical inquiry and attempted to discover an innovative philosophical system... |
Epicurus Epicurus Epicurus was an ancient Greek philosopher and the founder of the school of philosophy called Epicureanism.Only a few fragments and letters remain of Epicurus's 300 written works... |
| Karl Schlegel | Heraklitus |
| Ludwig Wittgenstein Ludwig Wittgenstein Ludwig Josef Johann Wittgenstein was an Austrian philosopher who worked primarily in logic, the philosophy of mathematics, the philosophy of mind, and the philosophy of language. He was professor in philosophy at the University of Cambridge from 1939 until 1947... |
Democritus Democritus Democritus was an Ancient Greek philosopher born in Abdera, Thrace, Greece. He was an influential pre-Socratic philosopher and pupil of Leucippus, who formulated an atomic theory for the cosmos.... |
| Friedrich Nietzsche Friedrich Nietzsche Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche was a 19th-century German philosopher, poet, composer and classical philologist... |
Socrates Socrates Socrates was a classical Greek Athenian philosopher. Credited as one of the founders of Western philosophy, he is an enigmatic figure known chiefly through the accounts of later classical writers, especially the writings of his students Plato and Xenophon, and the plays of his contemporary ... (capt) |
| Martin Heidegger Martin Heidegger Martin Heidegger was a German philosopher known for his existential and phenomenological explorations of the "question of Being."... |
Archimedes Archimedes Archimedes of Syracuse was a Greek mathematician, physicist, engineer, inventor, and astronomer. Although few details of his life are known, he is regarded as one of the leading scientists in classical antiquity. Among his advances in physics are the foundations of hydrostatics, statics and an... |
| Karl Marx Karl Marx Karl Heinrich Marx was a German philosopher, economist, sociologist, historian, journalist, and revolutionary socialist. His ideas played a significant role in the development of social science and the socialist political movement... - substituting Wittgenstein in the 2nd half |
(Wittgenstein was, of course, Austria
Austria
Austria , officially the Republic of Austria , is a landlocked country of roughly 8.4 million people in Central Europe. It is bordered by the Czech Republic and Germany to the north, Slovakia and Hungary to the east, Slovenia and Italy to the south, and Switzerland and Liechtenstein to the...
n.)
Philosophers Football Match 2010
Inspired by the famous Monty Python sketch, and with the full backing of the surviving Pythons, a tribute/replay of The Philosophers' Football Match was held in North London, at Wingate & Finchley’s Harry Abrahams stadium, North London on 9 May 2010.This tongue-in-cheek re-staging – on a real London pitch – of the original sketch, was the idea of The Philosophy Shop, a specialist provider of education and training for primary school children. The group works to enable Philosophy
Philosophy
Philosophy is the study of general and fundamental problems, such as those connected with existence, knowledge, values, reason, mind, and language. Philosophy is distinguished from other ways of addressing such problems by its critical, generally systematic approach and its reliance on rational...
graduates at University level to conduct practical philosophy sessions for children aged 5 to 11 as part of a drive to boost their reasoning skills from their first days in the school environment.
Philosophers A.C. Grayling and Former England Manager Graham Taylor had been appointed as managers for the event, and players included comedians Mark Steel
Mark Steel
Mark Steel is a British socialist columnist, author and comedian. He was a member of the Socialist Workers Party from his late teens until 2007.-Early life:...
, Tony Hawks
Tony Hawks
Antony Gordon Hawksworth, better known as Tony Hawks, is a British comedian and author.-Early life:Born in Brighton in 1960, Hawks was educated at Brighton Hove and Sussex Grammar School and Brighton College...
, Arthur Smith
Arthur Smith
Arthur Smith may refer to:*Arthur "Guitar Boogie" Smith , American guitar player and composer*Arthur Donaldson Smith, American explorer of Africa*Arthur Henderson Smith , American missionary in China, author of books on Chinese culture...
and Ariane Sherine
Ariane Sherine
Ariane Sherine is a British comedy writer and journalist. She created the UK version of the Atheist Bus Campaign, which ran in January 2009. She lives in London.- Career :...
, as well as philosophers Julian Baggini
Julian Baggini
Julian Baggini is the author of several books about philosophy written for a general audience. He is the author of The Pig that Wants to be Eaten and 99 other thought experiments and is co-founder and editor-in-chief of The Philosophers' Magazine...
, Nigel Warburton
Nigel Warburton
Nigel Warburton is a philosopher, currently Senior Lecturer at the Open University. He is best known as a populariser of philosophy, being author of a number of books of this genre, but he has also written academic works in esthetics and applied ethics.-Education:Warburton received a BA from the...
, Simon Glendinning
Simon Glendinning
Dr Simon Glendinning is an English philosopher currently teaching in the European Institute at the London School of Economics. He is Director of the Forum for European Philosophy....
, Stephen Law
Stephen Law
Dr. Stephen Law is a philosopher and senior lecturer at Heythrop College in the University of London. He also edits the philosophical journal Think, which is published by the Royal Institute of Philosophy and aimed at the general public. Law currently lives in Oxford, England, with his wife and two...
, Angie Hobbs
Angie Hobbs
Angela Hunter Hobbs is a British philosopher. Hobbs is a Lecturer in Philosophy at the University of Warwick, and was previously a Research Fellow at Christ's College, Cambridge. She has a First Class Honours Degree in Classics acquired at New Hall, Cambridge and a PhD in Classical Philosophy from...
and Mark Vernon
Mark Vernon
Mark Vernon is a writer, broadcaster and journalist. He writes for The Guardian, The Philosophers' Magazine, Financial Times and New Statesman. He has appeared on BBC Radio 4's In Our Time. He used to be a Church of England priest...
, plus other academics from Universities nationwide. Match supporters included sociologist and Radio 4 Thinking Allowed presenter Laurie Taylor, the BBC’s John Humphrys
John Humphrys
Desmond John Humphrys , is a Welsh-born British author, journalist and presenter of radio and television, who has won many national broadcasting awards...
and educationalist and author Anthony Seldon
Anthony Seldon
Dr. Anthony F. Seldon MA, PhD, FRSA, MBA, FRHistS is a political commentator best known as Tony Blair's biographer and the Master of Wellington College...
.
External links
- Script to the sketch, Mount Holyoke CollegeMount Holyoke CollegeMount Holyoke College is a liberal arts college for women in South Hadley, Massachusetts. It was the first member of the Seven Sisters colleges, and served as a model for some of the others...
- Philosophers Football Match 2010