Stepfamily
Encyclopedia
A stepfamily, also known as a blended family or reconstituted family, is a family
Family
In human context, a family is a group of people affiliated by consanguinity, affinity, or co-residence. In most societies it is the principal institution for the socialization of children...

 in which one or both members of the couple have children from a previous relationship. The member of the couple to whom the child is not biologically related is the stepparent, specifically the stepmother or stepfather.

The traditional and strictest definition of a "stepfamily" is a married couple where one or both members of the couple have pre-existing children who live with them. More recently, the definition is often expanded to include all cohabiting couples, whether married or not. Some people also apply the term to non-custodial relationships, where "stepparent" can refer to the partner of a parent with whom the child does not live. The term is not generally used (but can be in individual cases) to refer to the relationship with an adult child who never lived in the home with the parent's new partner.

A stepfamily can be "simple," in which only one member of the couple has a prior child or children, or it can be "complex" or "blended." In a blended stepfamily, both members of the couple may have had pre-existing children, or the couple may have additional children together. If both members of the couple have prior children, the children are stepbrothers and stepsisters to one another. Any subsequent child born to the couple becomes the half-sister or half-brother of the prior children from previous relations.
If a stepparent legally adopts the partner's child or children, he or she becomes their legal parent. In such cases they may stop using the terms "stepparent" and "stepchild" and simply refer to the child as their son or daughter. However, some of the emotional and psychological issues common to stepfamilies may still persist.

In many cases, a family member is just as bonded with his/her stepfamily as with the biological family.

Statistics

Statistics in the United States are difficult to come by, because the U.S. Census Bureau has discontinued providing estimates of marriage, divorce, and remarriage except for those that are available from the 1990 and earlier censuses.
  • The most common form of blended family is a mother and stepfather arrangement, since mothers often maintain custody of the children.
  • One-third of all children entering stepfamilies were born to an unmarried mother; the other two-thirds of cases involve divorce or the death of one parent.
  • Of the 60 million American children under the age of 13, half are currently living with one biological parent and that parent's current partner.
  • The 1990 U.S. census estimated that by the year 2000 there would be more stepfamilies than original families.
  • If only children residing in legally married stepfamilies are included, 23% of U.S. children would be designated as living in a stepfamily; when children are included who live with a cohabiting parent, the figure rises to 30%.

Etymology

The earliest recorded use of the prefix step-, in the form steop-, is from an 8th century glossary
Glossary
A glossary, also known as an idioticon, vocabulary, or clavis, is an alphabetical list of terms in a particular domain of knowledge with the definitions for those terms...

 of Latin
Latin
Latin is an Italic language originally spoken in Latium and Ancient Rome. It, along with most European languages, is a descendant of the ancient Proto-Indo-European language. Although it is considered a dead language, a number of scholars and members of the Christian clergy speak it fluently, and...

-Old English words. Steopsunu is given for the Latin word filiaster and steopmoder for nouerca. Similar words recorded later in Old English include stepbairn, stepchild and stepfather. The words are used to denote a connection resulting from the remarriage of a widowed parent and are related to the word ástíeped meaning bereaved, with stepbairn and stepchild occasionally used simply as synonym
Synonym
Synonyms are different words with almost identical or similar meanings. Words that are synonyms are said to be synonymous, and the state of being a synonym is called synonymy. The word comes from Ancient Greek syn and onoma . The words car and automobile are synonyms...

s for orphan. Words such as stepbrother, stepniece and stepparent appeared much later and do not have any particular connotation of bereavement. Corresponding words in other Germanic languages include: Old High German
Old High German
The term Old High German refers to the earliest stage of the German language and it conventionally covers the period from around 500 to 1050. Coherent written texts do not appear until the second half of the 8th century, and some treat the period before 750 as 'prehistoric' and date the start of...

 stiuf- and Old Norse
Old Norse
Old Norse is a North Germanic language that was spoken by inhabitants of Scandinavia and inhabitants of their overseas settlements during the Viking Age, until about 1300....

 stjúp-.

Legal status

Although, historically, stepfamilies are built through the institution
Institution
An institution is any structure or mechanism of social order and cooperation governing the behavior of a set of individuals within a given human community...

 of marriage, and are legally recognized, it is currently unclear if a stepfamily can be both established and recognized by less formal arrangements, such as when a man or woman with children cohabits with another man or woman outside of marriage. This relationship is becoming more common in all Western countries.

Historically and to this day, there appear to be many culture
Culture
Culture is a term that has many different inter-related meanings. For example, in 1952, Alfred Kroeber and Clyde Kluckhohn compiled a list of 164 definitions of "culture" in Culture: A Critical Review of Concepts and Definitions...

s in which these families are recognized socially as de facto
De facto
De facto is a Latin expression that means "concerning fact." In law, it often means "in practice but not necessarily ordained by law" or "in practice or actuality, but not officially established." It is commonly used in contrast to de jure when referring to matters of law, governance, or...

 families. However, in modern Western culture it is often unclear as to what, if any, social status
Social status
In sociology or anthropology, social status is the honor or prestige attached to one's position in society . It may also refer to a rank or position that one holds in a group, for example son or daughter, playmate, pupil, etc....

 and protection they enjoy in law
Law
Law is a system of rules and guidelines which are enforced through social institutions to govern behavior, wherever possible. It shapes politics, economics and society in numerous ways and serves as a social mediator of relations between people. Contract law regulates everything from buying a bus...

.

The stepparent is a "legal stranger" in most of the U.S. and has no legal right to the minor child no matter how involved in the child's life they are. The biological parents (and, where applicable, adoptive parents) hold that privilege and responsibility. So if the biological parent doesn't give up his or her parental rights and custody of the child, the other parent's subsequent marriage cannot create a parental relationship without the biological parent's written consent before a "child" reaches adulthood. In most cases, the stepparent can not be ordered to pay child support.

With regard to unmarried couples, one can easily imagine such social and legal recognition, most notably in the case of common law marriage. Unmarried couples today may also find social recognition locally through community
Community
The term community has two distinct meanings:*a group of interacting people, possibly living in close proximity, and often refers to a group that shares some common values, and is attributed with social cohesion within a shared geographical location, generally in social units larger than a household...

 consensus.

Still, it is not at all clear what formal parenting
Parenting
Parenting is the process of promoting and supporting the physical, emotional, social, and intellectual development of a child from infancy to adulthood...

 roles, rights, responsibilities and social etiquette
Etiquette
Etiquette is a code of behavior that delineates expectations for social behavior according to contemporary conventional norms within a society, social class, or group...

 should exist between "stepparents" and their "stepchildren." This often leaves the parents in unexpected conflicts with each other, their former spouses and the children.

For all the confusion which stepparents may feel, it is often even less clear to the stepchildren what the interpersonal relationships are, or should be, between themselves and their stepsiblings; between themselves and their stepparent; and even between themselves and their birth parents. These relationships can be extremely complex, especially in circumstances where each "stepspouse" may bring children of their own to the home or in households where children are expected to actively participate in each of the newly created families of both birth parents.

Although most stepfamilies can agree on what they do not want to be for one another, they are often hard pressed to agree upon what they do want to be for one another. This makes it difficult for everyone in the family to learn their roles. It is especially difficult for the children, because the roles and expectations of them change as they move between the homes and families of both of their birth parents.

Stepparent adoption

Stepparents can become legal parents to their stepchildren through the process of stepparent adoption
Adoption
Adoption is a process whereby a person assumes the parenting for another and, in so doing, permanently transfers all rights and responsibilities from the original parent or parents...

. Both biological parents, if living, must consent or agree to the adoption
Adoption
Adoption is a process whereby a person assumes the parenting for another and, in so doing, permanently transfers all rights and responsibilities from the original parent or parents...

. When a stepparent adopts a stepchild, either the non-custodial parent of the child willingly gives up his or her parental rights to the child, or the court terminates the parental rights of a biological parent if there is evidence of abuse or neglect to the child. If a parent is not involved in the child's life, the court can terminate that biological parent's rights on the grounds of abandonment
Abandonment
The term abandonment has a multitude of uses, legal and extra-legal. This "signpost article" provides a guide to the various legal and quasi-legal uses of the word and includes links to articles that deal with each of the distinct concepts at greater length...

. Grounds for abandonment
Abandonment
The term abandonment has a multitude of uses, legal and extra-legal. This "signpost article" provides a guide to the various legal and quasi-legal uses of the word and includes links to articles that deal with each of the distinct concepts at greater length...

 in most states are no contact between the parent and child for at least one year.

It is important to check with local laws when looking to complete a stepparent adoption
Adoption
Adoption is a process whereby a person assumes the parenting for another and, in so doing, permanently transfers all rights and responsibilities from the original parent or parents...

. While having the non-custodial parent consent to the adoption
Adoption
Adoption is a process whereby a person assumes the parenting for another and, in so doing, permanently transfers all rights and responsibilities from the original parent or parents...

 is the easiest way to complete a stepparent adoption
Adoption
Adoption is a process whereby a person assumes the parenting for another and, in so doing, permanently transfers all rights and responsibilities from the original parent or parents...

, it is still possible to have one completed when they either do not consent, or cannot be located.

If the biological parent who is not involved in the child's life cannot be found, a stepparent adoption
Adoption
Adoption is a process whereby a person assumes the parenting for another and, in so doing, permanently transfers all rights and responsibilities from the original parent or parents...

 can still occur. Typically, a public notice must be published in the newspaper for 30–45 days, stating the intention to have the biological parent's rights terminated, and the intent for the stepparent to adopt the child. If the biological parent does not respond to the notice, then the stepparent adoption
Adoption
Adoption is a process whereby a person assumes the parenting for another and, in so doing, permanently transfers all rights and responsibilities from the original parent or parents...

 will continue as though the absent parent consented to the adoption
Adoption
Adoption is a process whereby a person assumes the parenting for another and, in so doing, permanently transfers all rights and responsibilities from the original parent or parents...

.

Stepparent adoption
Adoption
Adoption is a process whereby a person assumes the parenting for another and, in so doing, permanently transfers all rights and responsibilities from the original parent or parents...

 also can occur if the other biological parent is deceased.

In research

In her book, Becoming a Stepfamily, Patricia Papernow (1993) suggests that each stepfamily goes through seven distinct stages of development, which can be divided into the Early, Middle, and Late stages. The Early stages consist of the Fantasy, Immersion, and Awareness stages. In the Fantasy stage, both children and parents are typically "stuck" in their fantasies or wishes for what their family could be like. The developmental task for this stage is for each member to articulate their wants and needs. In the Immersion stage, the family is typically struggling to live out the fantasy of a "perfect" blended family. In this stage, it is critical for the "insider spouse" (i.e. the biological parent who typically forms the emotional hub of the family) to understand that the feelings of the "outsider spouse" and children are real. The task of this stage is to persist in the struggle to become aware of the various experiences. This stage is followed by the Awareness stage, in which the family gathers information about what the new family looks like (e.g., roles, traditions, "family culture") and how each member feels about it. The tasks of this stage are twofold: individual and joint. The individual task is for each member to begin to put words to the feelings they are experiencing, and to voice their needs to other family members. The joint task is for family members to begin to transcend the "experiential gaps" and to try to form an understanding of other members' roles and experiences.

The Middle stages consist of the Mobilization and Action stages. In the Mobilization stage, the stepparent can begin to step forward to address the family's process and structure. The tasks of this stage are to confront differences in each member's perception of the new family, as well as to influence one another before shaming or blaming begins to take action to reorganize the family structure. The goal here is to make joint decisions about new stepfamily rituals, rules, and roles. The focus in this stage is on the stepfamily's unique "middle ground" (i.e. the "areas of shared experience, shared values, and easy cooperative functioning created over time," p. 39), and on balancing this new middle ground with honoring of past and other relationships.

The Later stages consist of the Contact and Resolution stages. In the Contact stage, the couple is working well together, the boundaries between households are clear, and stepparents have definite roles with stepchildren as "intimate outsiders." The task for this stage is in solidifying the stepparent's role, and in continuing the process of awareness. Finally, in the Resolution stage, the stepfamily's identity has become secure. The family accepts itself for who it is, there is a strong sense of the stepfamily's middle ground, and children feel secure in both households. The task for this stage is to nourish the depth and maturity gained through this process, and to rework any issues that might arise at family "nodal events" (e.g., weddings, funerals, graduations, etc.).
  • Children in a one parent family often feel threatened when their parent is dating as the parent is looking for a prospective spouse. The prospective spouse can often feel threatened as the children become part of the package within the relationship. Stepfamilies can sometimes find it difficult to feel like a family as the spouse may not feel equal to the children due to the fact that a biological parent and their biological child have a stronger bond which is separate from the marriage.

Stepmothers

The notion of the word stepmother being descriptive of an intrinsically unkind parent is suggested by peculiar wording in John Gamble's "An Irish Wake" (1826). He writes of a woman soon to die, who instructs her successor to "be kind to my children." Gamble writes that the injunction was forgotten and that she "proved a very step-mother."

Fairy tales

In fiction, stepmothers are often portrayed as being wicked and evil
Evil
Evil is the violation of, or intent to violate, some moral code. Evil is usually seen as the dualistic opposite of good. Definitions of evil vary along with analysis of its root motive causes, however general actions commonly considered evil include: conscious and deliberate wrongdoing,...

. The character
Fictional character
A character is the representation of a person in a narrative work of art . Derived from the ancient Greek word kharaktêr , the earliest use in English, in this sense, dates from the Restoration, although it became widely used after its appearance in Tom Jones in 1749. From this, the sense of...

 of the wicked stepmother features heavily in fairy tales; the most famous examples are Cinderella
Cinderella
"Cinderella; or, The Little Glass Slipper" is a folk tale embodying a myth-element of unjust oppression/triumphant reward. Thousands of variants are known throughout the world. The title character is a young woman living in unfortunate circumstances that are suddenly changed to remarkable fortune...

, Snow White
Snow White
"Snow White" is a fairy tale known from many countries in Europe, the best known version being the German one collected by the Brothers Grimm...

, and Hansel and Gretel
Hansel and Gretel
"Hansel and Gretel" is a well-known fairy tale of German origin, recorded by the Brothers Grimm and published in 1812. Hansel and Gretel are a young brother and sister threatened by a cannibalistic hag living deep in the forest in a house constructed of cake and confectionery. The two children...

. Stepdaughters are her most common victim, and then stepdaughter/stepson pairs, but stepsons also are victims as in The Juniper Tree
The Juniper Tree (fairy tale)
The Juniper Tree is a German fairy tale collected by the Brothers Grimm. In some editions the story is called, The Almond Tree. The Text in the Grimm collection is in Low German....

—sometime, as in East of the Sun and West of the Moon
East of the Sun and West of the Moon
East of the Sun and West of the Moon is a Norwegian folk tale.East of the Sun and West of the Moon was collected by Peter Christen Asbjørnsen and Jørgen Moe...

, because he refused to marry his stepsister as she wished, or, indeed, they may make their stepdaughters-in-law their victims, as in The Boys with the Golden Stars
The Boys with the Golden Stars
The Boys with the Golden Stars is a Romanian fairy tale collected in Rumanische Märchen. Andrew Lang included it in The Violet Fairy Book.-Synopsis:...

. In some fairy tales, such as Giambattista Basile
Giambattista Basile
Giambattista Basile was an Italian poet, courtier, and fairy tale collector.- Biography :Born to a Neapolitan middle-class family, Basile was, during his career, a courtier and soldier to various Italian princes, including the doge of Venice. According to Benedetto Croce he was born in 1575, while...

's La Gatta Cennerentola or the Danish Green Knight
The Green Knight (fairy tale)
The Green Knight is a Danish fairy tale, collected by Evald Tang Kristensen in "Eventyr fra Jylland" and by Svend Grundtvig in Danish Fairy Tales.This tale combines Aarne-Thompson type 510A with type 425N, the bird husband, and type 432, the prince as bird...

, the stepmother wins the marriage by ingratiating herself with the stepdaughter, and once she obtains it, becomes cruel.

In some fairy tales, the stepdaughter's escape by marrying does not free her from her stepmother. After the birth of the stepdaughter's first child, the stepmother may attempt to murder the new mother and replace her with her own daughter—thus making her the stepmother to the next generation. Such a replacement occurs in The Wonderful Birch
The Wonderful Birch
The Wonderful Birch is a Russian fairy tale.A variant on Cinderella, it is Aarne-Thompson folktale type 510A, the persecuted heroine. It makes use of shapeshifting motifs.Andrew Lang included it in The Red Fairy Book.-Synopsis:...

, Brother and Sister
Brother and Sister
Brother and Sister is a well-known European fairy tale which was, among others, written down by the Brothers Grimm in their collection of Children's and Household Tales ...

, and The Three Little Men in the Wood
The Three Little Men in the Wood
The Three Little Men in the Wood or The Three Dwarfs is a German fairy tale collected by the Brothers Grimm, number 13. Andrew Lang included it in The Red Fairy Book, and a version of the tale appears in A Book of Dwarfs by Ruth Manning-Sanders.It is Aarne-Thompson type 403B, the black and the...

; only by foiling the stepmother's plot (and usually executing her), is the story brought to a happy ending. In the Korean Folktale Janghwa Hongreyon, the stepmother kills her own stepdaughters.

Fairy tales can have variants where one tale has an evil mother and the other an evil stepmother: in The Six Swans
The Six Swans
The Six Swans is a German fairy tale collected by the Brothers Grimm. It is tale number 49. Andrew Lang included a variant in The Yellow Fairy Book. It is Aarne-Thompson type 451: the brothers who were turned into birds...

, the heroine is persecuted by her husband's mother, and in The Twelve Wild Ducks
The Twelve Wild Ducks
The Twelve Wild Ducks is a Norwegian fairy tale collected by Peter Christen Asbjørnsen and Jørgen Moe in Norske Folkeeventyr.It is Aarne-Thompson type 451, the brothers who were turned into birds.-Plot summary:...

, by his stepmother. Sometimes this appears to be a deliberate switch: The Brothers Grimm
Brothers Grimm
The Brothers Grimm , Jacob Grimm and Wilhelm Grimm , were German academics, linguists, cultural researchers, and authors who collected folklore and published several collections of it as Grimm's Fairy Tales, which became very popular...

, having put in their first editions versions of Snow White
Snow White
"Snow White" is a fairy tale known from many countries in Europe, the best known version being the German one collected by the Brothers Grimm...

and Hansel and Gretel
Hansel and Gretel
"Hansel and Gretel" is a well-known fairy tale of German origin, recorded by the Brothers Grimm and published in 1812. Hansel and Gretel are a young brother and sister threatened by a cannibalistic hag living deep in the forest in a house constructed of cake and confectionery. The two children...

where the villain was the mother, altered it to a stepmother in later editions, perhaps to mitigate the story's violence. The Icelandic fairy tale The Horse Gullfaxi and the Sword Gunnfoder
The Horse Gullfaxi and the Sword Gunnfoder
The Horse Gullfaxi and the Sword Gunnfoder is an Icelandic fairy tale from Islandische Märchen. Andrew Lang included it in The Crimson Fairy Book.Ruth Manning-Sanders included it, as "Sigurd the King's Son", in A Book of Ogres and Trolls....

features a good stepmother, who indeed aids the prince like a fairy godmother
Fairy godmother
In fairy tales, a fairy godmother is a fairy with magical powers who acts as a mentor or parent to someone, in the role that an actual godparent was expected to play in many societies...

, but this figure is very rare in fairy tales.

The stepmother may be identified with other evils the characters meet. For instance, both the stepmother and the witch in Hansel and Gretel are deeply concerned with food, the stepmother to avoid hunger, the witch with her house built of food and her desire to eat the children, and when the children kill the witch and return home, their stepmother has mysteriously died.

In many stories with evil stepmothers, the hostility between the stepmother and the stepchild is underscored by having the child succeed through aid from the dead mother. This motif occurs from Norse mythology
Norse mythology
Norse mythology, a subset of Germanic mythology, is the overall term for the myths, legends and beliefs about supernatural beings of Norse pagans. It flourished prior to the Christianization of Scandinavia, during the Early Middle Ages, and passed into Nordic folklore, with some aspects surviving...

, where Svipdagr rouses his mother Gróa
Gróa
In Norse mythology, Gróa is a völva and practitioner of seiðr, the wife of Aurvandil the Bold.-Prose Edda:Gróa appears in the Prose Edda book Skáldskaparmál, in the context of Thor's battle with the jötunn Hrungnir...

 from the grave so as to learn from her how to accomplish a task his stepmother set, to fairy tales such as the Brothers Grimm
Brothers Grimm
The Brothers Grimm , Jacob Grimm and Wilhelm Grimm , were German academics, linguists, cultural researchers, and authors who collected folklore and published several collections of it as Grimm's Fairy Tales, which became very popular...

 version of Cinderella
Cinderella
"Cinderella; or, The Little Glass Slipper" is a folk tale embodying a myth-element of unjust oppression/triumphant reward. Thousands of variants are known throughout the world. The title character is a young woman living in unfortunate circumstances that are suddenly changed to remarkable fortune...

, where Aschenputtel receives her clothing from a tree growing on her mother's grave, the Russian Vasilissa the Beautiful
Vasilissa the Beautiful
Vasilisa the Beautiful , commonly known as Vasilisa's Doll, is a Russian fairy tale collected by Alexander Afanasyev in Narodnye russkie skazki....

, where Vasilissa is aided by a doll her mother gave, and her mother's blessing, and the Malay Bawang Putih Bawang Merah
Bawang Putih Bawang Merah
Bawang Putih Bawang Merah is one of the more famous of old Malay archipelago folktales, passed down orally through the generations. Like most Malay folktales, the story is laden with lessons regarding familial values, patience in the face of adversity, and that ultimately good will be rewarded and...

, where the heroine's mother comes back as fish to protect her.

This hostility from the stepmother and tenderness from the true mother has been interpreted in varying ways. A psychological interpretation, by Bruno Bettelheim
Bruno Bettelheim
Bruno Bettelheim was an Austrian-born American child psychologist and writer. He gained an international reputation for his work on Freud, psychoanalysis, and emotionally disturbed children.-Background:...

, describes it as "splitting" the actual mother in an ideal mother and a false mother that contains what the child dislikes in the actual mother. However, historically, many women died in childbirth, their husbands remarried, and the new stepmothers competed with the children of the first marriage for resources; the tales can be interpreted as factual conflicts from history. In some fairy tales, such as The Juniper Tree, the stepmother's hostility is overtly the desire to secure the inheritance of her children.

Chinese literature

Stepmothers also make many appearances in Chinese tales of family.

Wicked stepmothers are common. In Classic of Filial Piety, Guo Jujing told the story of Min Ziqian, who had lost his mother at a young age. His stepmother had two more sons and saw to it that they were warmly dressed in winter but neglected her stepson. When her husband discovered this, he decided to divorce her. His son interceded, on the ground that she neglected only him, but when they had no mother, all three sons would be neglected. His father relented, and the stepmother henceforth took care of all three children. For this, he was held up as a model of filial piety
Filial piety
In Confucian ideals, filial piety is one of the virtues to be held above all else: a respect for the parents and ancestors. The Confucian classic Xiao Jing or Classic of Xiào, thought to be written around 470 BCE, has historically been the authoritative source on the Confucian tenet of xiào /...

.

Conversely, the exemplary stepmother prefers the stepson to her own child, in recognition that his seniority makes him superior. The "righteous stepmother of Qi," faced with her son and stepson having been found by a murdered man, and both having confessed to shield the other, argues for her son's execution because her husband had ordered her to look after her stepson, and her son is the junior brother; the king pardoned them both for her devotion to duty.

Modern fiction

The ubiquity of the wicked stepmother has made it a frequent theme of revisionist fairy tale fantasy. This can range from Tanith Lee
Tanith Lee
Tanith Lee is a British writer of science fiction, horror and fantasy. She is the author of over 70 novels and 250 short stories, a children's picture book and many poems. She also wrote two episodes of BBC science fiction series Blake's 7...

's Red as Blood, where the stepmother queen is desperately trying to protect the land from her evil stepdaughter's magic, to Diana Wynne Jones
Diana Wynne Jones
Diana Wynne Jones was a British writer, principally of fantasy novels for children and adults, as well as a small amount of non-fiction...

's Howl's Moving Castle
Howl's Moving Castle
Howl's Moving Castle is a young adult fantasy novel by British author Diana Wynne Jones, first published in 1986. It won a Boston Globe-Horn Book Award and was named an ALA Notable Book for both children and young adults. In 2004 it was adapted as an Academy Award-nominated animated film by Hayao...

, where, although it is known that stepmothers are evil, the actual stepmother is guilty of nothing more than some carelessness, to Erma Bombeck
Erma Bombeck
Erma Louise Bombeck was an American humorist who achieved great popularity for her newspaper column that described suburban home life from the mid-1960s until the late 1990s...

's retelling where Cinderella
Cinderella
"Cinderella; or, The Little Glass Slipper" is a folk tale embodying a myth-element of unjust oppression/triumphant reward. Thousands of variants are known throughout the world. The title character is a young woman living in unfortunate circumstances that are suddenly changed to remarkable fortune...

 is lazy and a liar. More subtly, Piers Anthony
Piers Anthony
Piers Anthony Dillingham Jacob is an English American writer in the science fiction and fantasy genres, publishing under the name Piers Anthony. He is most famous for his long-running novel series set in the fictional realm of Xanth.Many of his books have appeared on the New York Times Best...

 depicted the Princess Threnody as being cursed by her stepmother in Crewel Lye: A Caustic Yarn
Crewel Lye: A Caustic Yarn
Crewel Lye: A Caustic Yarn is the eighth book of the Xanth series by Piers Anthony.-Plot Introduction:This book is a story within a story as one of Castle Roogna's ghosts, Jordan the Barbarian, tells Princess Ivy his story of betrayal and death via the magical medium of the Tapestry.-Plot...

: if she ever entered Castle Roogna, it would fall down. But Threnody explains that her presence at the castle caused her father to dote on her and neglect his duties to the destruction of the kingdom; her stepmother had merely made her destructive potential literal, and forced her to confront what she was doing.

Despite many examples of evil or cruel stepmothers, loving stepmothers also exist in fiction. In Kevin and Kell
Kevin and Kell
Kevin and Kell is a furry comedy webcomic strip by syndicated cartoonist Bill Holbrook. The strip began on September 3, 1995. It is one of the oldest continuously running webcomics....

, Kell is portrayed as loving her stepdaughter Lindesfarne, whom her husband Kevin had adopted during his previous marriage. Likewise, Lindesfarne considers Kell her mother, and has a considerably more favorable view of her than Angelique, Kevin's ex-wife and her adoptive mother, due to feeling neglected by Angelique during her childhood. The Disney film Enchanted also makes references to the "evil stepmother" belief, as the villainess is a stepmother, but her wickedness comes from her selfishness and power hungriness rather than the simple fact she is a stepmother. When a little girl tells the heroine Giselle that all stepmothers are evil, Giselle reminds her that she personally knows some wonderful women who were good stepmothers, and the fact a woman is a stepmother does not suddenly change her personality. This is shown later on when Giselle gets married to that girl's father, who had her from a previous marriage, thus becoming a stepmother herself. As Giselle is a sweet and caring woman, she makes a good wife and stepmother. However, it is notable that during much of that film, Giselle was more of an older sister figure than a maternal figure to that little girl.

In the movie Nanny McPhee
Nanny McPhee
Nanny McPhee is a 2005 fantasy film starring Emma Thompson and Colin Firth. Thompson also wrote the screenplay, which is adapted from Christianna Brand's Nurse Matilda books.-Plot:...

a group of children worry that their father will remarry, believing from their fairy tales that all stepmothers are an "evil breed." Although they help their father marry again to help keep the family together, their soon-to-be stepmother is very cruel, as they suspected. When the wedding to her is called off, the father decides to marry the much kinder scullery maid, causing one child to comment that the evil stepmother personification does not apply to her.

Stepmother relationships are often examined in soap opera
Soap opera
A soap opera, sometimes called "soap" for short, is an ongoing, episodic work of dramatic fiction presented in serial format on radio or as television programming. The name soap opera stems from the original dramatic serials broadcast on radio that had soap manufacturers, such as Procter & Gamble,...

s. An example of this is the longrunning rivalry between Victoria Lord Banks
Victoria Lord
Victoria "Viki" Lord is the principal fictional character and matriarch of the Lord family on the ABC soap opera One Life to Live...

 and stepmother Dorian Lord on the American soap opera One Life to Live
One Life to Live
One Life to Live is an American soap opera which debuted on July 15, 1968 and has been broadcast on the ABC television network. Created by Agnes Nixon, the series was the first daytime drama to primarily feature racially and socioeconomically diverse characters and consistently emphasize social...

.

In contrast to many other Disney-related media, the cartoon show Phineas and Ferb
Phineas and Ferb
Phineas and Ferb is an American animated television comedy series. Originally broadcast as a preview on August 17, 2007, on Disney Channel, the series follows Phineas Flynn and his English stepbrother Ferb Fletcher on summer vacation. Every day the boys embark on some grand new project, which...

features a stepfamily in which both parents get along well with their three children (avoiding the normal tropes of evil step-parents).

Drake and Josh also features a stepfamily in which both parents usually get along well with their three children.

Stepfathers

Though rarer, there are also cases of evil stepfathers, such as in the fairy tales The Gold-bearded Man
The Gold-bearded Man
The Gold-bearded Man is an Hungarian fairy tale collected in Ungarische Mahrchen. Andrew Lang included it in The Crimson Fairy Book.-Synopsis:...

(in a plot usually featuring a cruel father) and The Little Bull-Calf
The Little Bull-Calf
The Little Bull-Calf is an English Gypsy fairy tale collected by Joseph Jacobs in More English Fairy Tales.Marian Roalfe Cox, in her pioneering study of Cinderella, identified it as a "hero" type, featuring a male hero instead of the usual heroine....

. One type of such tale features a defeated villain who insists on marrying the hero's mother and makes her help him trick the hero and so defeat him. Such tales include The Prince and the Princess in the Forest
The Prince and the Princess in the Forest
The Prince and the Princess in the Forest is a Danish fairy tale. It was collected by Evald Tang Kristensen in "Eventyr fra Jylland". Andrew Lang included it in The Olive Fairy Book.-Synopsis:...

and The Blue Belt
The Blue Belt
The Blue Belt is a Norwegian fairy tale collected by Peter Christen Asbjørnsen and Jørgen Moe in Norske Folkeeventyr. It is Aarne-Thompson type 590.-Plot summary:...

, although the tales of this type can also feature a different female relation, such as the stepsister in The Three Princes and their Beasts
The Three Princes and their Beasts
The Three Princes and their Beasts is a Lithuanian fairy tale. Andrew Lang included it in The Violet Fairy Book.-Synopsis:Three princes had a stepsister. They all set out one day, hunting, and were going to shoot a wolf when it offered to give each of the princes a cub if they did not. The same...

.

In literature, evil stepfathers include Claudius in Hamlet
Hamlet
The Tragical History of Hamlet, Prince of Denmark, or more simply Hamlet, is a tragedy by William Shakespeare, believed to have been written between 1599 and 1601...

(though his role as uncle is more emphasized), Murdstone in Charles Dickens
Charles Dickens
Charles John Huffam Dickens was an English novelist, generally considered the greatest of the Victorian period. Dickens enjoyed a wider popularity and fame than had any previous author during his lifetime, and he remains popular, having been responsible for some of English literature's most iconic...

's David Copperfield
David Copperfield (novel)
The Personal History, Adventures, Experience and Observation of David Copperfield the Younger of Blunderstone Rookery , commonly referred to as David Copperfield, is the eighth novel by Charles Dickens, first published as a novel in 1850. Like most of his works, it originally appeared in serial...

, the classic Twilight Zone
The Twilight Zone (1959 TV series)
The Twilight Zone is an American anthology television series created by Rod Serling, which ran for five seasons on CBS from 1959 to 1964. The series consisted of unrelated episodes depicting paranormal, futuristic, dystopian, or simply disturbing events; each show typically featured a surprising...

episode "Living Doll," the King from the movie Radio Flyer, and Gozaburo Kaiba (who adopted Seto and Mokuba Kaiba) from Yu-Gi-Oh!
Yu-Gi-Oh!
is a Japanese manga created by Kazuki Takahashi. It has produced a franchise that includes multiple anime shows, a trading card game and numerous video games...

, as well as The Stepfather
The Stepfather (1987 film)
The Stepfather is a 1987 American thriller film starring Terry O'Quinn in the title role. It is loosely based on the life of mass murderer John List, although the plot is more commonly associated with slasher films of the era than a true story. It was directed by Joseph Ruben and written by Donald E...

, films. The film, Sucker Punch fetures a sexually abusive stepfather.

In his opera La Cenerentola
La Cenerentola
La Cenerentola, ossia La bontà in trionfo is an operatic dramma giocoso in two acts by Gioachino Rossini. The libretto was written by Jacopo Ferretti, based on the fairy tale Cinderella...

, Gioacchino Rossini
Gioacchino Rossini
Gioachino Antonio Rossini was an Italian composer who wrote 39 operas as well as sacred music, chamber music, songs, and some instrumental and piano pieces...

 inverted the tale of Cinderella to have her oppressed by her stepfather. His motive is made explicit, in that providing a dowry
Dowry
A dowry is the money, goods, or estate that a woman brings forth to the marriage. It contrasts with bride price, which is paid to the bride's parents, and dower, which is property settled on the bride herself by the groom at the time of marriage. The same culture may simultaneously practice both...

 to Cenerentola would cut into what he can give to his own daughters. An analogous male figure may also appear as a wicked uncle; like the stepmother, the father's brother may covet the child's inheritance for his own children, and so maltreat his nephews or nieces. Modern films, however, seem to cast stepfathers in a somewhat kinder light, implying honorable men who marry divorced women or single mothers make good stepfathers.

Step- and half-siblings

In fairy tales, stepsiblings and half-siblings can but need not take after their mother. In Cinderella
Cinderella
"Cinderella; or, The Little Glass Slipper" is a folk tale embodying a myth-element of unjust oppression/triumphant reward. Thousands of variants are known throughout the world. The title character is a young woman living in unfortunate circumstances that are suddenly changed to remarkable fortune...

, the ugly sisters
Ugly sisters
The ugly sisters are characters in the fairy tale and pantomime, Cinderella. They are the daughters of Cinderella's cruel stepmother, who treat her poorly...

 are the main character's stepsisters. Mother Hulda
Mother Hulda
Mother Hulda is a German fairy tale collected by the Brothers Grimm and first published in 1812 as part of Children's and Household Tales. It was originally known as Frau Holle and is tale number 24.- Synopsis :...

also features wicked stepsisters and The Wonderful Birch
The Wonderful Birch
The Wonderful Birch is a Russian fairy tale.A variant on Cinderella, it is Aarne-Thompson folktale type 510A, the persecuted heroine. It makes use of shapeshifting motifs.Andrew Lang included it in The Red Fairy Book.-Synopsis:...

a wicked half-sister, but The Rose-Tree
The Rose-Tree
The Rose-Tree is an English fairy tale collected by Joseph Jacobs in English Fairy Tales.Also included within A Book Of British Fairytales by Alan Garner.It is Aarne-Thompson type 720, my mother slew me; my father ate me...

and The Juniper Tree
The Juniper Tree (fairy tale)
The Juniper Tree is a German fairy tale collected by the Brothers Grimm. In some editions the story is called, The Almond Tree. The Text in the Grimm collection is in Low German....

feature loving half-siblings, and Kate Crackernuts loving stepsisters.

Many romance novel
Romance novel
The romance novel is a literary genre developed in Western culture, mainly in English-speaking countries. Novels in this genre place their primary focus on the relationship and romantic love between two people, and must have an "emotionally satisfying and optimistic ending." Through the late...

s feature heroes who are the stepbrother of the heroine. The step-relationship generally stems from a marriage when the hero and heroine are at least in their adolescence.

Stepfamilies

Some family films and television sitcoms feature a stepfamily as the center premise. In many cases, the stepfamily is large and full of children causing situations such as sibling rivalry, rooming, falling in love, and getting along amongst the children as popular plotlines. The stepfamily premise dates back as far as the 1968 film Yours, Mine and Ours
Yours, Mine and Ours (1968 film)
For the remake of this film starring Dennis Quaid and Rene Russo see Yours, Mine and Ours Yours, Mine and Ours is a 1968 film, directed by Melville Shavelson and starring Lucille Ball, Henry Fonda and Van Johnson...

. This film gave way to a classic family television sitcom about a blended family known as The Brady Bunch
The Brady Bunch
The Brady Bunch is an American sitcom created by Sherwood Schwartz and starring Robert Reed, Florence Henderson, and Ann B. Davis. The series revolved around a large blended family...

. Some contemporary family sitcoms have made the blended family sitcom more popular with the TGIF
TGIF (ABC)
TGIF was the name of an American family-friendly prime time television programming block on the ABC network. The name comes from the initials of the popular phrase "Thank God It's Friday"...

 show Step by Step bringing about other shows such as Aliens in the Family
Aliens in the Family
Aliens in the Family is an American sci-fi/fantasy sitcom that aired on ABC, conceived as part of its TGIF lineup.-Premise:The show was about single dad Doug Brody , who is abducted by single alien mom Cookie . The two fall in love, get married, and try to live a normal life on Earth as a mixed...

, Life with Derek
Life with Derek
Life with Derek is a Canadian television sitcom that aired on Family and VRAK.TV in Canada and on Disney Channel in the United States. The series premiered on Family on September 18, 2005 and ran for four seasons ending on March 25, 2009. The series starred Michael Seater and Ashley Leggat as the...

, Drake & Josh
Drake & Josh
Drake & Josh is an American sitcom that premiered on the Nickelodeon television network on January 11, 2004, which follows the lives of two stepbrothers. It stars Drake Bell and Josh Peck as stepbrothers Drake Parker and Josh Nichols, respectively. Both actors had played roles in The Amanda Show,...

, and the short lived NBC
NBC
The National Broadcasting Company is an American commercial broadcasting television network and former radio network headquartered in the GE Building in New York City's Rockefeller Center with additional major offices near Los Angeles and in Chicago...

 family sitcom Something So Right
Something So Right
Something So Right is an American television situation comedy which ran on two different networks during its time on the air, and in reruns on the USA Network for a number of years after its cancellation....

. The Life of Riley
Life of Riley (TV series)
Life of Riley is a British comedy television series, shown on BBC One & BBC HD. The show stars Caroline Quentin and Neil Dudgeon, who are recently married, and is set around their dysfunctional family. The show also features the couples four children, Danny, , Katy , Ted and Rosie...

is a 2009 British comedy television series, shown on BBC One & BBC HD. It focuses on the lives of a blended family. Kevin and Kell
Kevin and Kell
Kevin and Kell is a furry comedy webcomic strip by syndicated cartoonist Bill Holbrook. The strip began on September 3, 1995. It is one of the oldest continuously running webcomics....

is a comic strip that focuses on a blended family. The Disney Channel
Disney Channel
Disney Channel is an American basic cable and satellite television network, owned by the Disney-ABC Television Group division of The Walt Disney Company. It is under the direction of Disney-ABC Television Group President Anne Sweeney. The channel's headquarters is located on West Alameda Ave. in...

 animated series Phineas and Ferb
Phineas and Ferb
Phineas and Ferb is an American animated television comedy series. Originally broadcast as a preview on August 17, 2007, on Disney Channel, the series follows Phineas Flynn and his English stepbrother Ferb Fletcher on summer vacation. Every day the boys embark on some grand new project, which...

also prominently features a blended family, chosen by co-creator Jeff "Swampy" Marsh in part due to its underuse in children's programming, and his personal experiences growing up in such a family.

Stepfamily education

The prevalence of stepfamilies has increased over the past century with the increase of divorce and remarriage. These families are unique in their experiences facing many challenges which first-married families do not. For example role ambiguity, dealing with stepchildren, and ex-spouses are only a few of the issues which are unique to these families. In response to these families' desire for assistance, stepfamily education has become an increasingly common topic among scholars and educators. Although still a relatively new facet within the marriage education realm, stepfamily education provides important information which may not be addressed in traditional marriage or relationship education curriculum. As discussed by Adler-Baeder and Higginbotham (2004) a number of curricula are currently available to stepfamilies and family life educators; however, further research is needed in order to determine best-practices for the field. One way in which this gap is being filled is through the current implementation of Healthy Marriage Demonstration Grants in the U.S. As part of the Deficit Reduction Act of 2005, grants for healthy marriage and responsible fatherhood, which include at-risk and diverse populations such as stepfamilies, are providing important information on the evaluation of stepfamily programs and their effectiveness in servicing stepfamilies.

Selected bibliography

  • LeBey, Barbara (2004). Remarried with Children: Ten Secrets for Successfully Blending and Extending Your Family. New York: Bantam.
  • Papernow, Patricia L. (1993). Becoming a Stepfamily: Patterns of Development in Remarried Families. San Francisco: Jossey-Bass.
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