Going Dutch
Encyclopedia
"Going Dutch" is a term that indicates that each person participating in a group activity pays for himself or herself, rather than any one person paying for anyone else, particularly in a restaurant bill. It is also called Dutch date and Dutch Treat.
There are two possible senses—each person paying his own expenses, or the entire bill being split (divided evenly) between all participants. In strict usage, "Going Dutch" refers to the former, paying one's own expenses, with the latter being referred to as "splitting the bill", but in casual usage these may both be referred to as "Going Dutch". Splitting the bill is generally easier to compute, as it does not require checking what each individual ordered, but has the downside that people who ordered more expensive items are subsidized by others.
. Previously on farmhouses this consisted of two equal parts (Sullivan. 2010). Another school of thought is that it may be related to Dutch etiquette. In the Netherlands
, it was not unusual to pay separately when going out as a group. When dating in a one-on-one situation, however, the man will most commonly pay for meals and drinks. English rivalry with the Netherlands especially during the period of the Anglo-Dutch Wars
gave rise to several phrases including Dutch that promote certain negative stereotype
s. Examples include Dutch oven
, Dutch courage
, Dutch uncle
and Dutch wife
.
The gambling
term dutching
may follow this same route as it describes a system that shares stakes across a number of bets. It is commonly believed, however, that the Dutch reference here was in fact derived from a gangster (Dutch Schultz
) who used this strategy to profit from racing.
In United States, during the advent of second wave feminism
, the late 1960s and 1970s, the women's movement encouraged women to understand aspects of their own personal lives as deeply politicized. Many feminists investigated the framework and assumptions of traditional courtship roles. They subscribed to the idea that there should be equality of the sexes, not just legally, but socially and sexually.
They held that it was mature, empowering and self-respecting for women to pay their own way in romantic dates. They were rejecting traditional gender role
assumptions that men should make more money and should pay for affections through dinners and other date costs. In this way, women were making an equal investment in the cost of courtship
.
It became more common for women to pay their own way or to pay for men's meals. It is, however, still widely accepted that on a date, the man should be the one taking the initiative when it comes to paying the bill, which means that he is the one to pay, unless the woman signals that she will cover the tab, after which it becomes impolite for the man to insist on paying; it shows respect for the woman's desire to be treated equally to let her pay the bill.
, Sweden
, Denmark
, Iceland
, Canada
, Norway
and Australia
, the practice of splitting the bill in restaurants is common. In a courtship situation where both parts have a similar financial standing, which is commonplace in the aforementioned nations, the traditional custom of the man always paying in restaurants has largely fallen out of use and is by many, including etiquette authorities, considered old fashioned. Generally a romantic couple will take turns paying the bill or split it. Generally it is assumed that everyone pays for himself or herself in restaurants unless the invitation stated otherwise.
In most of northern Europe, central Europe and Australia the practice of splitting the bill is common. On a dinner date, the man may pay the bill as a way of overtly stating that he views this as a romantic situation and that he has some hopes or expectations for a future development. Some women object to this or even find it offensive (per Feminist support for Dutch date practice above) so it is a judgment call. Younger urban women especially tend not to accept men paying for them; or will in turn insist to pay for the next dinner or drink.
In south European Countries such as Italy
, Portugal
, Greece
it is rather uncommon for locals to have separate bills, sometimes even regarded rude, especially when in larger groups. But in urban areas or places frequented by tourists this has changed over the last decades. In Greece the practice is sometimes called "refenes".
In Middle Eastern cultures, going Dutch is judged to be extremely rude. Traditions of hospitality play a great part in who pays, therefore an invitation will be given only when the host feels he/she is able to afford the expenses of all. Similarly, gender roles and age play a more important role than they would in Western societies.
In India, Pakistan, Afghanistan, Iran it is even considered taboo to ask people to pay their own bills. The bills are paid by the one who is elder, or by the male or by the local to that area or by the one who invited if there is no significant age gap. Invitations are only given if someone understands that they can pay for all of the guests.
In Korea where rigid social systems are still in place, it is most common for the person of the highest social standing, such as a boss or an elder figure, to pay the bill. This not only applies in a 1 to 1 situation but also in groups. Among the younger generation, it is quite common for friends to alternate when paying the bill, or for one to pay for dinner and another to pay for drinks.
In Colombia, this practice is referred to as "estilo Americano" ("American style" in Spanish), particularly when referring to dates involving men and women.
In some parts of Italy (especially the south), the expression pagare alla romana can be translated as: "To pay like people of Rome" or "to pay like they do in Rome". It has the same meaning as "going Dutch". This can lead to misunderstanding, because in other parts of Italy pagare alla romana means to divide equally the total cost between all the commensals.
The corresponding phrase in Turkish is hesabı Alman usulü ödemek, which can be translated into English as "to pay the bill the German way". Alman usûlü = German style
Some South American countries use the Spanish phrase pagar a la americana (literally "to pay American style") which refers to a trait attributed to people from the United States or Canada.
In France, it is close to "faire moitié-moitié" or "faire moite-moite", which means "each one pays half of the bill". But this usually does not include women, who according to the "étiquette" should not pay when there are also men at the lunch/dinner. In a business meeting, the receiving party usually pays for all - it is considered poor not to do so.
In Egypt
, it is called Englizy, which translates into "English style".
In Argentina specifically, 'a la romana' (exact translation of Italian's 'pagare alla romana') is widely used and 'pagar a la americana' (pay American style) doesn't exist.
In Panama
the phrase mita y mita (a colloquial contraction of mitad y mitad in this case with the stress on the first syllable mi) literally "half and half" refers to both "going Dutch" and to splitting the check equally.
In Guatemala
the phrase is "a la ley de Cristo... cada quien con su pisto" which is used more as a rhyme with the word "Cristo" and "pisto" rather than having a religious connotation.
Almost the same in Honduras
where the phrase is "Como dijo Cristo... cada quien con su pisto".
In El Salvador
the rhyming phrase 'Ley de Esparta... Cada quien paga lo que se harta', which means 'Spartan Law, each pays what he/she eats'.
In South Korea
, they usually call it as "Dutch Pay", a konglish
loan phrase.
In India
, in Hindi
, the practice is called as TTMM - Tu Tera Mein Mera Hindi
(or Tujhe Tu Majhe Mi in Marathi
) meaning 'You pay yours and I pay mine'.
Generally though, since the concept of dating is very new this act is not applied to dating.
When the expression going Dutch is used, it often refers to splitting the bill equally. In Pakistan, similarly, Apna Apna is used to mean 'Each his own'.
In Thailand, the practice is referred to as อเมริกันแชร์ "American Share".
In the Philippines, it is referred to as KKB; an acronym for "Kanya-kanyang bayad" which means "pay for your own self".
In Japan, the phrase 兵隊勘定 (へいたいかんじょう) (heitaikanjou) is used, which can translate loosely as 'soldier's calculation'. The terms 割り勘 （わりかん） (warikan) and ゴーダッチ (goodacchi) also exist.
In Greater China
, the appropriate term is "AA制 (AA dzɐi)，" where zhì is the Chinese word for "system". Explanations vary: "AA" could stand for "Algebraic Average" or "Acting Appointment" or "About to Act".
There are two possible senses—each person paying his own expenses, or the entire bill being split (divided evenly) between all participants. In strict usage, "Going Dutch" refers to the former, paying one's own expenses, with the latter being referred to as "splitting the bill", but in casual usage these may both be referred to as "Going Dutch". Splitting the bill is generally easier to compute, as it does not require checking what each individual ordered, but has the downside that people who ordered more expensive items are subsidized by others.
Etymology
The phrase "going Dutch" originates from the concept of a Dutch doorDutch door
A Dutch door , or stable door , or half door , is a door divided horizontally in such a fashion that the bottom half may remain shut while the top half opens...
. Previously on farmhouses this consisted of two equal parts (Sullivan. 2010). Another school of thought is that it may be related to Dutch etiquette. In the Netherlands
Netherlands
The Netherlands is a constituent country of the Kingdom of the Netherlands, located mainly in North-West Europe and with several islands in the Caribbean. Mainland Netherlands borders the North Sea to the north and west, Belgium to the south, and Germany to the east, and shares maritime borders...
, it was not unusual to pay separately when going out as a group. When dating in a one-on-one situation, however, the man will most commonly pay for meals and drinks. English rivalry with the Netherlands especially during the period of the Anglo-Dutch Wars
Anglo-Dutch Wars
The Anglo–Dutch Wars were a series of wars fought between the English and the Dutch in the 17th and 18th centuries for control over the seas and trade routes. The first war took place during the English Interregnum, and was fought between the Commonwealth of England and the Dutch Republic...
gave rise to several phrases including Dutch that promote certain negative stereotype
Stereotype
A stereotype is a popular belief about specific social groups or types of individuals. The concepts of "stereotype" and "prejudice" are often confused with many other different meanings...
s. Examples include Dutch oven
Dutch oven (practical joke)
A Dutch oven is a slang term for pulling a cover over someone's head while in bed and creating flatulence, thereby creating an area of foul-odored air in an enclosed space that must be inhaled...
, Dutch courage
Dutch courage
Dutch courage or liquid courage refers to courage gained from intoxication by alcohol. Originally the phrase 'Dutch courage' referred to the courage that results from indulgence in Dutch gin , but 'Dutch courage' can also apply to the gin itself.In 1650 Franciscus Sylvius, a Dutch doctor, created...
, Dutch uncle
Dutch uncle
Dutch uncle is a term for a person who issues frank, harsh, and severe comments and criticism to educate, encourage, or admonish someone. Thus, a "Dutch uncle" is a person who is rather the reverse of what is normally thought of as avuncular or uncle-like .-Origins:In Britain, at the time of the...
and Dutch wife
Dutch wife
Dutch wife may refer to:* a long body-length pillow better known as a dakimakura* a Zhufuren, a wicker or bamboo pillow-shaped "cage" which is kept in the bed on hot nights to improve air circulation* a prostitute* a sex doll* a hot water bottle...
.
The gambling
Gambling
Gambling is the wagering of money or something of material value on an event with an uncertain outcome with the primary intent of winning additional money and/or material goods...
term dutching
Dutching
In gambling, Dutching is sharing the risk of losing across a number or runners by backing more than one selection in a race or event. The process calculates the correct stake to place on each selection so that the return is the same if any of them wins...
may follow this same route as it describes a system that shares stakes across a number of bets. It is commonly believed, however, that the Dutch reference here was in fact derived from a gangster (Dutch Schultz
Dutch Schultz
Dutch Schultz was a New York City-area Jewish American gangster of the 1920s and 1930s who made his fortune in organized crime-related activities such as bootlegging alcohol and the numbers racket...
) who used this strategy to profit from racing.
As date practice
In United States, during the advent of second wave feminism
Second-wave feminism
The Feminist Movement, or the Women's Liberation Movement in the United States refers to a period of feminist activity which began during the early 1960s and lasted through the early 1990s....
, the late 1960s and 1970s, the women's movement encouraged women to understand aspects of their own personal lives as deeply politicized. Many feminists investigated the framework and assumptions of traditional courtship roles. They subscribed to the idea that there should be equality of the sexes, not just legally, but socially and sexually.
They held that it was mature, empowering and self-respecting for women to pay their own way in romantic dates. They were rejecting traditional gender role
Gender role
Gender roles refer to the set of social and behavioral norms that are considered to be socially appropriate for individuals of a specific sex in the context of a specific culture, which differ widely between cultures and over time...
assumptions that men should make more money and should pay for affections through dinners and other date costs. In this way, women were making an equal investment in the cost of courtship
Courtship
Courtship is the period in a couple's relationship which precedes their engagement and marriage, or establishment of an agreed relationship of a more enduring kind. In courtship, a couple get to know each other and decide if there will be an engagement or other such agreement...
.
It became more common for women to pay their own way or to pay for men's meals. It is, however, still widely accepted that on a date, the man should be the one taking the initiative when it comes to paying the bill, which means that he is the one to pay, unless the woman signals that she will cover the tab, after which it becomes impolite for the man to insist on paying; it shows respect for the woman's desire to be treated equally to let her pay the bill.
International practices
In FinlandFinland
Finland , officially the Republic of Finland, is a Nordic country situated in the Fennoscandian region of Northern Europe. It is bordered by Sweden in the west, Norway in the north and Russia in the east, while Estonia lies to its south across the Gulf of Finland.Around 5.4 million people reside...
, Sweden
Sweden
Sweden , officially the Kingdom of Sweden , is a Nordic country on the Scandinavian Peninsula in Northern Europe. Sweden borders with Norway and Finland and is connected to Denmark by a bridge-tunnel across the Öresund....
, Denmark
Denmark
Denmark is a Scandinavian country in Northern Europe. The countries of Denmark and Greenland, as well as the Faroe Islands, constitute the Kingdom of Denmark . It is the southernmost of the Nordic countries, southwest of Sweden and south of Norway, and bordered to the south by Germany. Denmark...
, Iceland
Iceland
Iceland , described as the Republic of Iceland, is a Nordic and European island country in the North Atlantic Ocean, on the Mid-Atlantic Ridge. Iceland also refers to the main island of the country, which contains almost all the population and almost all the land area. The country has a population...
, Canada
Canada
Canada is a North American country consisting of ten provinces and three territories. Located in the northern part of the continent, it extends from the Atlantic Ocean in the east to the Pacific Ocean in the west, and northward into the Arctic Ocean...
, Norway
Norway
Norway , officially the Kingdom of Norway, is a Nordic unitary constitutional monarchy whose territory comprises the western portion of the Scandinavian Peninsula, Jan Mayen, and the Arctic archipelago of Svalbard and Bouvet Island. Norway has a total area of and a population of about 4.9 million...
and Australia
Australia
Australia , officially the Commonwealth of Australia, is a country in the Southern Hemisphere comprising the mainland of the Australian continent, the island of Tasmania, and numerous smaller islands in the Indian and Pacific Oceans. It is the world's sixth-largest country by total area...
, the practice of splitting the bill in restaurants is common. In a courtship situation where both parts have a similar financial standing, which is commonplace in the aforementioned nations, the traditional custom of the man always paying in restaurants has largely fallen out of use and is by many, including etiquette authorities, considered old fashioned. Generally a romantic couple will take turns paying the bill or split it. Generally it is assumed that everyone pays for himself or herself in restaurants unless the invitation stated otherwise.
In most of northern Europe, central Europe and Australia the practice of splitting the bill is common. On a dinner date, the man may pay the bill as a way of overtly stating that he views this as a romantic situation and that he has some hopes or expectations for a future development. Some women object to this or even find it offensive (per Feminist support for Dutch date practice above) so it is a judgment call. Younger urban women especially tend not to accept men paying for them; or will in turn insist to pay for the next dinner or drink.
In south European Countries such as Italy
Italy
Italy , officially the Italian Republic languages]] under the European Charter for Regional or Minority Languages. In each of these, Italy's official name is as follows:;;;;;;;;), is a unitary parliamentary republic in South-Central Europe. To the north it borders France, Switzerland, Austria and...
, Portugal
Portugal
Portugal , officially the Portuguese Republic is a country situated in southwestern Europe on the Iberian Peninsula. Portugal is the westernmost country of Europe, and is bordered by the Atlantic Ocean to the West and South and by Spain to the North and East. The Atlantic archipelagos of the...
, Greece
Greece
Greece , officially the Hellenic Republic , and historically Hellas or the Republic of Greece in English, is a country in southeastern Europe....
it is rather uncommon for locals to have separate bills, sometimes even regarded rude, especially when in larger groups. But in urban areas or places frequented by tourists this has changed over the last decades. In Greece the practice is sometimes called "refenes".
In Middle Eastern cultures, going Dutch is judged to be extremely rude. Traditions of hospitality play a great part in who pays, therefore an invitation will be given only when the host feels he/she is able to afford the expenses of all. Similarly, gender roles and age play a more important role than they would in Western societies.
In India, Pakistan, Afghanistan, Iran it is even considered taboo to ask people to pay their own bills. The bills are paid by the one who is elder, or by the male or by the local to that area or by the one who invited if there is no significant age gap. Invitations are only given if someone understands that they can pay for all of the guests.
In Korea where rigid social systems are still in place, it is most common for the person of the highest social standing, such as a boss or an elder figure, to pay the bill. This not only applies in a 1 to 1 situation but also in groups. Among the younger generation, it is quite common for friends to alternate when paying the bill, or for one to pay for dinner and another to pay for drinks.
In Colombia, this practice is referred to as "estilo Americano" ("American style" in Spanish), particularly when referring to dates involving men and women.
In some parts of Italy (especially the south), the expression pagare alla romana can be translated as: "To pay like people of Rome" or "to pay like they do in Rome". It has the same meaning as "going Dutch". This can lead to misunderstanding, because in other parts of Italy pagare alla romana means to divide equally the total cost between all the commensals.
The corresponding phrase in Turkish is hesabı Alman usulü ödemek, which can be translated into English as "to pay the bill the German way". Alman usûlü = German style
Some South American countries use the Spanish phrase pagar a la americana (literally "to pay American style") which refers to a trait attributed to people from the United States or Canada.
In France, it is close to "faire moitié-moitié" or "faire moite-moite", which means "each one pays half of the bill". But this usually does not include women, who according to the "étiquette" should not pay when there are also men at the lunch/dinner. In a business meeting, the receiving party usually pays for all - it is considered poor not to do so.
In Egypt
Egypt
Egypt , officially the Arab Republic of Egypt, Arabic: , is a country mainly in North Africa, with the Sinai Peninsula forming a land bridge in Southwest Asia. Egypt is thus a transcontinental country, and a major power in Africa, the Mediterranean Basin, the Middle East and the Muslim world...
, it is called Englizy, which translates into "English style".
In Argentina specifically, 'a la romana' (exact translation of Italian's 'pagare alla romana') is widely used and 'pagar a la americana' (pay American style) doesn't exist.
In Panama
Panama
Panama , officially the Republic of Panama , is the southernmost country of Central America. Situated on the isthmus connecting North and South America, it is bordered by Costa Rica to the northwest, Colombia to the southeast, the Caribbean Sea to the north and the Pacific Ocean to the south. The...
the phrase mita y mita (a colloquial contraction of mitad y mitad in this case with the stress on the first syllable mi) literally "half and half" refers to both "going Dutch" and to splitting the check equally.
In Guatemala
Guatemala
Guatemala is a country in Central America bordered by Mexico to the north and west, the Pacific Ocean to the southwest, Belize to the northeast, the Caribbean to the east, and Honduras and El Salvador to the southeast...
the phrase is "a la ley de Cristo... cada quien con su pisto" which is used more as a rhyme with the word "Cristo" and "pisto" rather than having a religious connotation.
Almost the same in Honduras
Honduras
Honduras is a republic in Central America. It was previously known as Spanish Honduras to differentiate it from British Honduras, which became the modern-day state of Belize...
where the phrase is "Como dijo Cristo... cada quien con su pisto".
In El Salvador
El Salvador
El Salvador or simply Salvador is the smallest and the most densely populated country in Central America. The country's capital city and largest city is San Salvador; Santa Ana and San Miguel are also important cultural and commercial centers in the country and in all of Central America...
the rhyming phrase 'Ley de Esparta... Cada quien paga lo que se harta', which means 'Spartan Law, each pays what he/she eats'.
In South Korea
South Korea
The Republic of Korea , , is a sovereign state in East Asia, located on the southern portion of the Korean Peninsula. It is neighbored by the People's Republic of China to the west, Japan to the east, North Korea to the north, and the East China Sea and Republic of China to the south...
, they usually call it as "Dutch Pay", a konglish
Konglish
Konglish is the use of English words in a Korean context. The words, having initially been taken from the English language, are either actual English words in Korean context, like 모터사이클 , or are made from a combination of Korean and/or English words which are not used in English-speaking...
loan phrase.
In India
India
India , officially the Republic of India , is a country in South Asia. It is the seventh-largest country by geographical area, the second-most populous country with over 1.2 billion people, and the most populous democracy in the world...
, in Hindi
Hindi
Standard Hindi, or more precisely Modern Standard Hindi, also known as Manak Hindi , High Hindi, Nagari Hindi, and Literary Hindi, is a standardized and sanskritized register of the Hindustani language derived from the Khariboli dialect of Delhi...
, the practice is called as TTMM - Tu Tera Mein Mera Hindi
Hindi
Standard Hindi, or more precisely Modern Standard Hindi, also known as Manak Hindi , High Hindi, Nagari Hindi, and Literary Hindi, is a standardized and sanskritized register of the Hindustani language derived from the Khariboli dialect of Delhi...
(or Tujhe Tu Majhe Mi in Marathi
Marathi language
Marathi is an Indo-Aryan language spoken by the Marathi people of western and central India. It is the official language of the state of Maharashtra. There are over 68 million fluent speakers worldwide. Marathi has the fourth largest number of native speakers in India and is the fifteenth most...
) meaning 'You pay yours and I pay mine'.
Generally though, since the concept of dating is very new this act is not applied to dating.
When the expression going Dutch is used, it often refers to splitting the bill equally. In Pakistan, similarly, Apna Apna is used to mean 'Each his own'.
In Thailand, the practice is referred to as อเมริกันแชร์ "American Share".
In the Philippines, it is referred to as KKB; an acronym for "Kanya-kanyang bayad" which means "pay for your own self".
In Japan, the phrase 兵隊勘定 (へいたいかんじょう) (heitaikanjou) is used, which can translate loosely as 'soldier's calculation'. The terms 割り勘 （わりかん） (warikan) and ゴーダッチ (goodacchi) also exist.
In Greater China
Greater China
Greater China is a term used to refer to mainland China, Hong Kong, Macau and Taiwan. As a "phrase of the moment", the precise meaning is not entirely clear, and people may use it for only the commercial ties, only the cultural actions, or even as a euphemism for the Two Chinas, while others may...
, the appropriate term is "AA制 (AA dzɐi)，" where zhì is the Chinese word for "system". Explanations vary: "AA" could stand for "Algebraic Average" or "Acting Appointment" or "About to Act".