Jewish view of marriage
Encyclopedia

In Judaism
Judaism
Judaism ) is the "religion, philosophy, and way of life" of the Jewish people...

, marriage
Marriage
Marriage is a social union or legal contract between people that creates kinship. It is an institution in which interpersonal relationships, usually intimate and sexual, are acknowledged in a variety of ways, depending on the culture or subculture in which it is found...

 is viewed as a contractual bond commanded by God in which a man and a woman come together to create a relationship in which God is directly involved. Though procreation is not the sole purpose, a Jewish marriage is also expected to fulfill the commandment to have children. The main focus centers around the relationship between the husband and wife. On the spiritual level, marriage is understood to mean that the husband and wife are merging together into a single soul. This is why a man is considered "incomplete" if he is not married, as his soul is only one part of a larger whole that remains to be unified.

Engagement

In Jewish law, an engagement
Engagement
An engagement or betrothal is a promise to marry, and also the period of time between proposal and marriage which may be lengthy or trivial. During this period, a couple is said to be betrothed, affianced, engaged to be married, or simply engaged...

 (shidukhin) is a contract between a man and a woman where they mutually promise to marry each other at some future time and the terms on which it shall take place. The promise may be made by the intending parties or by their respective parents or other relatives on their behalf. The promise is formalized in a document known as the , the "Document of Conditions", which is read prior to the . After this reading, the mothers of the future bride and groom break a plate. Today, some sign the contract on the day of the wedding, some do it as an earlier ceremony, and some do not do it at all.

In Haredi
Haredi Judaism
Haredi or Charedi/Chareidi Judaism is the most conservative form of Orthodox Judaism, often referred to as ultra-Orthodox. A follower of Haredi Judaism is called a Haredi ....

 communities, many marriages are arranged by a professional match-maker ("shadchan") who receives a "brokerage-fee" for his or her services. The parents may be actively involved in the matchmaking procedure, but the young couple is not forced to marry. The Shidduch
Shidduch
The Shidduch is a system of matchmaking in which Jewish singles are introduced to one another in Orthodox Jewish communities for the purpose of marriage....

 is thus a system of arranged introductions rather than arranged marriages.

Betrothal and marriage

In Jewish law, marriage
Marriage
Marriage is a social union or legal contract between people that creates kinship. It is an institution in which interpersonal relationships, usually intimate and sexual, are acknowledged in a variety of ways, depending on the culture or subculture in which it is found...

 consists of two separate acts, called erusin
Erusin
Erusin is the Hebrew term for betrothal. In modern Hebrew, "erusin" means engagement, but this is not the historical meaning of the term, which is the first part of marriage ....

(or kiddushin, meaning sanctification), which is the betrothal ceremony, and nissu'in or chupah, the actual ceremony for the marriage
Wedding
A wedding is the ceremony in which two people are united in marriage or a similar institution. Wedding traditions and customs vary greatly between cultures, ethnic groups, religions, countries, and social classes...

. Erusin changes the couple's interpersonal status, while nissu'in brings about the legal consequences of the change of status. In Talmud
Talmud
The Talmud is a central text of mainstream Judaism. It takes the form of a record of rabbinic discussions pertaining to Jewish law, ethics, philosophy, customs and history....

ic times, these two ceremonies usually took place up to a year apart; the bride lived with her parents until the actual marriage ceremony (nissuin), which would take place in a room or tent that the groom had set up for her. Since the Middle Ages the two ceremonies have taken place as a combined ceremony performed in public.

According to the Talmud, erusin involves the groom handing an object to the bride - either an object of value such as a ring, or a document stating that she is being betrothed to him. In order to be valid, this must be done in the presence of two unrelated male witnesses. After erusin, the laws of adultery
Adultery
Adultery is sexual infidelity to one's spouse, and is a form of extramarital sex. It originally referred only to sex between a woman who was married and a person other than her spouse. Even in cases of separation from one's spouse, an extramarital affair is still considered adultery.Adultery is...

 apply, and the marriage cannot be dissolved without a religious divorce
Get (divorce document)
A is a divorce document, which according to Jewish Law, must be presented by a husband to his wife to effect their divorce. The essential text of the is quite short: "You are hereby permitted to all men," i.e., the wife is no longer a married woman, and the laws of adultery no longer apply...

. After nisuin, the couple may live together.

Marital harmony

Marital harmony, known as "shlom bayit," is valued in Jewish tradition. The Talmud argues that a man should love his wife as much as he loves himself, and honour her more than he honours himself; indeed, one who honours his wife was said, by the classical rabbis, to be rewarded with wealth. Similarly, a husband was expected to discuss with his wife any worldly matters that might arise in his life. Tough love
Tough love
Tough love is an expression used when someone treats another person harshly or sternly with the intent to help them in the long run. The phrase was evidently coined by Bill Milliken when he wrote the book Tough Love in 1968 and has been used by numerous authors since then.In most uses, there must...

 was frowned upon; the Talmud forbids a husband from being overbearing to his household, and domestic abuse by him was also condemned. It was said of a wife that God counts her tears
Tears
Tears are secretions that clean and lubricate the eyes. Lacrimation or lachrymation is the production or shedding of tears....

.

As for the wife, the greatest praise the Talmudic rabbis offered to any woman was that given to a wife who fulfils the wishes of her husband; to this end, an early midrash
Midrash
The Hebrew term Midrash is a homiletic method of biblical exegesis. The term also refers to the whole compilation of homiletic teachings on the Bible....

 argues that a wife should not leave the home too frequently. A wife, also, was expected to be modest
Tzniut
Tzniut is a term used within Judaism and has its greatest influence as a concept within Orthodox Judaism...

, even if the only other person present with her was her husband. It was believed in classical times that God's presence dwelt in a pure and loving home.

Conjugal rights and obligations

Marriage obligations and rights in Judaism
Judaism
Judaism ) is the "religion, philosophy, and way of life" of the Jewish people...

 are ultimately based on those apparent in the Bible
Bible
The Bible refers to any one of the collections of the primary religious texts of Judaism and Christianity. There is no common version of the Bible, as the individual books , their contents and their order vary among denominations...

, although they have been filtered and expanded on by many prominent rabbinic authorities
Posek
Posek is the term in Jewish law for "decider"—a legal scholar who decides the Halakha in cases of law where previous authorities are inconclusive or in those situations where no halakhic precedent exists....

 throughout history. According to the non-traditional view, in the Bible the wife is treated as a possession owned by her husband, but later Judaism imposed several obligations on the husband, effectively giving the wife several rights and freedoms; indeed, being a Jewish wife was often a more favourable situation than being a wife in many other cultures. For example, the Talmud
Talmud
The Talmud is a central text of mainstream Judaism. It takes the form of a record of rabbinic discussions pertaining to Jewish law, ethics, philosophy, customs and history....

 establishes the principle that a wife is entitled, but not compelled, to the same dignity and social standing as her husband, and is entitled to keep any additional advantages she had as a result of her social status before her marriage.

In the traditional view, the Bible itself gives the wife rights, as per Exodus 21:10, although the rabbis may have added others later. The rights of the husband and wife are described in tractate Ketubot in the Talmud, which explains how the rabbis balanced the two sets of rights.

In the Bible

Biblical Hebrew has two words for "husband": ba'al (also meaning "master"), and ish (also meaning "man", parallel to isha meaning "woman" or "wife"). The words are contrasted in Hosea
Hosea
Hosea was the son of Beeri and a prophet in Israel in the 8th century BC. He is one of the Twelve Prophets of the Jewish Hebrew Bible, also known as the Minor Prophets of the Christian Old Testament. Hosea is often seen as a "prophet of doom", but underneath his message of destruction is a promise...

 2:18 (2:16 in Christian Bibles), where God speaks to Israel as though it is his wife: "On that day, says the Lord, you will call [me] 'my husband' (ish), and will no longer call me 'my master' (ba'al)."

Women were not isolated from society. The Bible refers to the presence of women at festive events. and they take part in public rejoicing, song, and dance.

A wife was also seen as being of high value, and was therefore, usually, carefully looked after. Early nomadic communities practised a form of marriage known as beena, in which a wife would own a tent of her own, within which she retains complete independence from her husband; this principle appears to survive in parts of early Israelite society, as some early passages of the bible appear to portray certain wives as each owning a tent as a personal possession (specifically, Jael
Jaël
Jaël, , is a singer-songwriter from the band Lunik. She also co-wrote and sang with Delerium on the song After All on their album Chimera, and the song Lost and Found on their album Nuages du Monde. She is both internationally famous in the Trance music community as well as domestically famous from...

, Sarah
Sarah
Sarah or Sara was the wife of Abraham and the mother of Isaac as described in the Hebrew Bible and the Quran. Her name was originally Sarai...

, and Jacob's wives). In later times, the bible describes wives as being given the innermost room(s) of the husband's house, as her own private area to which men were not permitted; in the case of wealthy husbands, the bible describes their wives as having each been given an entire house for this purpose.

It was not, however, a life of complete freedom. The descriptions of the bible suggest that a wife was expected to perform certain household tasks: spinning, sewing, weaving, manufacture of clothing, fetching of water, baking of bread, and animal husbandry
Animal husbandry
Animal husbandry is the agricultural practice of breeding and raising livestock.- History :Animal husbandry has been practiced for thousands of years, since the first domestication of animals....

. The Book of Proverbs
Book of Proverbs
The Book of Proverbs , commonly referred to simply as Proverbs, is a book of the Hebrew Bible.The original Hebrew title of the book of Proverbs is "Míshlê Shlomoh" . When translated into Greek and Latin, the title took on different forms. In the Greek Septuagint the title became "paroimai paroimiae"...

 contains an entire acrostic
Acrostic
An acrostic is a poem or other form of writing in which the first letter, syllable or word of each line, paragraph or other recurring feature in the text spells out a word or a message. As a form of constrained writing, an acrostic can be used as a mnemonic device to aid memory retrieval. A famous...

 about the duties which would be performed by a virtuous wife.

The husband too, is indirectly implied to have some responsibilities to his wife. The Covenant Code
Covenant Code
The Covenant Code, or alternatively Book of the Covenant, is the name given by academics to a text appearing in the Torah at Exodus - . Biblically, the text is the second of the law codes given to Moses by God at Mount Sinai...

 orders men who have two wives (polygynously
Polygyny
Polygyny is a form of marriage in which a man has two or more wives at the same time. In countries where the practice is illegal, the man is referred to as a bigamist or a polygamist...

) to not deprive the first wife of food, of clothing, nor of sexual activity; if the husband does not provide the first wife with these things, she is to be divorced, without cost to her. The Talmud interprets this as a requirement for a man to provide food and clothing to, and have sex with, each of his wives, even if he only has one.

As a polygynous
Polygyny
Polygyny is a form of marriage in which a man has two or more wives at the same time. In countries where the practice is illegal, the man is referred to as a bigamist or a polygamist...

 society, the Israelites did not have any laws which imposed marital fidelity on men. Adulterous
Adultery
Adultery is sexual infidelity to one's spouse, and is a form of extramarital sex. It originally referred only to sex between a woman who was married and a person other than her spouse. Even in cases of separation from one's spouse, an extramarital affair is still considered adultery.Adultery is...

 married women and adulterous betrothed women, however, were subject to the death penalty by the biblical laws against adultery, as were their male accomplices. According to the Priestly Code
Priestly Code
The Priestly Code is the name given, by academia, to the body of laws expressed in the Torah which do not form part of the Holiness Code, the Covenant Code, the Ritual Decalogue, or the Ethical Decalogue. The Priestly Code constitutes the majority of Leviticus, as well as some of the laws...

 of the Book of Numbers
Book of Numbers
The Book of Numbers is the fourth book of the Hebrew Bible, and the fourth of five books of the Jewish Torah/Pentateuch....

, if a pregnant woman was suspected of adultery, she was to be subjected to the Ordeal of Bitter Water, a form of trial by ordeal
Trial by ordeal
Trial by ordeal is a judicial practice by which the guilt or innocence of the accused is determined by subjecting them to an unpleasant, usually dangerous experience...

, but one that took a miracle to convict. The literary prophets
Literary prophets
The literary prophets is a name given to the Biblical figures who wrote down their prophecies and personal histories, rather than histories of the Israelites. By extension, the term is also sometimes used to refer to their writings, which mostly appear in the form of biblical poetry...

 indicate that adultery was a frequent occurrence, despite their strong protests against it, and these legal strictnesses.

In the Talmud and Rabbinic Judaism

The Talmud sets a minimum provision which a husband must provide to his wife:
  • enough bread for at least two meals a day
  • sufficient oil for cooking and for lighting purposes
  • sufficient wood for cooking
  • fruit and vegetables
  • wine, if it is customary in the locality for women to drink it
  • three meals consisting of fish and meat, on each shabbat
    Shabbat
    Shabbat is the seventh day of the Jewish week and a day of rest in Judaism. Shabbat is observed from a few minutes before sunset on Friday evening until a few minutes after when one would expect to be able to see three stars in the sky on Saturday night. The exact times, therefore, differ from...

  • a silver coin (Hebrew: ma'ah) each week, as pocket-money.


Rabbinic courts
Beth din
A beth din, bet din, beit din or beis din is a rabbinical court of Judaism. In ancient times, it was the building block of the legal system in the Biblical Land of Israel...

 could compel the husband to make this provision, if he fails to do so voluntarily. Moses Schreiber, a prominent opponent of early Reform Judaism
Reform Judaism
Reform Judaism refers to various beliefs, practices and organizations associated with the Reform Jewish movement in North America, the United Kingdom and elsewhere. In general, it maintains that Judaism and Jewish traditions should be modernized and should be compatible with participation in the...

, argued that if a man could not provide his wife with this minimum, he should be compelled to divorce her; other Jewish rabbis argued that a man should be compelled to hire himself out, as a day-labourer, if he cannot otherwise make this provision to his wife.

According to prominent Jewish writers of the Middle Ages, if a man is absent from his wife for a long period, the wife should be allowed to sell her husband's property, if necessary to sustain herself. Similarly, they argued that if a wife had to take out a loan to pay for her sustenance during such absence, her husband had to pay the debt on his return.

In order to offset the husband's duty to support his wife, she was required by the Talmud to surrender all her earnings to her husband, together with any profit she makes by accident, and the right of usufruct
Usufruct
Usufruct is the legal right to use and derive profit or benefit from property that either belongs to another person or which is under common ownership, as long as the property is not damaged or destroyed...

 on her property; the wife was not required to do this if she wished to support herself. Although the wife always retained ownership of her property itself, if she died while still married to her husband, he was to be her heir, according to the opinion of the Talmud; this principle, though, was modified, in various ways, by the rabbis of the Middle Ages.
Home and household

In Jewish tradition the husband was expected to provide a home for his wife, furnished in accordance to local custom, appropriate for the husband's status; the marital couple were expected to live together in this home, although if the husband's choice of work made it difficult to do so, the Talmud excuses him from the obligation. Traditionally, if the husband changed his usual abode, the wife was considered to have a duty to move with him. In the Middle Ages, it was argued that if a person continued to refuse to live with their spouse, the spouse in question had sufficient grounds for divorce

Most Jewish religious authorities held that a husband must allow his wife to eat at the same table as him, even if he gave his wife enough money to provide for herself. By contrast, if a husband mistreated his wife, or lived in a disreputable neighbourhood, the Jewish religious authorities would permit the wife to move to another home elsewhere, and would compel the husband to finance her life there.

Expanding on the household tasks which the bible implies a wife should undertake, rabbinic literature requires her to perform all the housework (such as baking, cooking, washing, caring for her children, etc.), unless her marriage had given the husband a large dowry
Dowry
A dowry is the money, goods, or estate that a woman brings forth to the marriage. It contrasts with bride price, which is paid to the bride's parents, and dower, which is property settled on the bride herself by the groom at the time of marriage. The same culture may simultaneously practice both...

; in the latter situation, the wife was expected only to tend to supposedly affectionate tasks, such as making his bed, and serving him his food. Jewish tradition expected the husband to provide the bed linen and kitchen utensils. If the wife had young twin children, the Talmud made her husband responsible for caring for one of them.
Clothing

The Talmud elaborates on the biblical requirement of the husband to provide his wife with clothing, by insisting that each year he must provide each wife with 50 zuzim's-worth of clothing, including garments appropriate to each season
Season
A season is a division of the year, marked by changes in weather, ecology, and hours of daylight.Seasons result from the yearly revolution of the Earth around the Sun and the tilt of the Earth's axis relative to the plane of revolution...

 of the year. The Talmudic rabbis insist that this annual clothing gift should include one hat, one belt, and three pairs of shoes (one pair for each of the three main annual festivals: Passover
Passover
Passover is a Jewish holiday and festival. It commemorates the story of the Exodus, in which the ancient Israelites were freed from slavery in Egypt...

, Shabu'ot, and Sukkoth). The husband was also expected by the classical rabbis to provide his wife with jewellery and perfumes if he lived in an area where this was customary.
Physical obligations

The Talmud argues that a husband is responsible for the protection of his wife's body. If his wife became ill, then he would be compelled, by the Talmud, to defray any medical expense which might be incurred in relation to this; the Talmud requires him to ensure that the wife receives care. Although he technically had the right to divorce his wife, enabling him to avoid paying for her medical costs, several prominent rabbis throughout history condemned such a course of action as inhuman behaviour, even if the wife was suffering from a prolonged illness.

If the wife dies, even if not due to illness, the Talmud's stipulations require the husband to arrange, and pay for, her burial; the burial must, in the opinion of the Talmud, be one conducted in a manner befitting the husband's social status, and in accordance with the local custom. Prominent rabbis of the Middle Ages clarified this, stating that the husband must make any provisions required by local burial customs, potentially including the hiring of mourners and the erection of a tombstone. According to the Talmud, and later rabbinic writers, if the husband was absent or refused to do these things, a rabbinical court should arrange the wife's funeral, selling some of the husband's property in order to defray the costs.

If the wife was captured, the husband was required by the Talmud and later writers to pay the ransom demanded for her release; there is some debate whether the husband was required only to pay up to the wife's market value as a slave, or whether he must pay any ransom, even to the point of having to sell his possessions to raise the funds. If the husband and wife were both taken captive, the historic Jewish view was that the rabbinic courts should first pay the ransom for the wife, selling some of the husband's property in order to raise the funds.
Fidelity

In the classical era the attitude of rabbi
Rabbi
In Judaism, a rabbi is a teacher of Torah. This title derives from the Hebrew word רבי , meaning "My Master" , which is the way a student would address a master of Torah...

nic scholars towards adultery was comparatively mild; although the Talmud
Talmud
The Talmud is a central text of mainstream Judaism. It takes the form of a record of rabbinic discussions pertaining to Jewish law, ethics, philosophy, customs and history....

 allowed people to be convicted of adultery merely on the basis of circumstantial evidence, it forbids conviction if
  • the woman had been raped, rather than consenting to the crime, or
  • the woman had mistaken the paramour for her husband, or
  • the woman had not already been cautioned, by her husband, in the presence of two witnesses, before the time the crime allegedly took place, against intimately associating with the paramour in question, or
  • the woman had not known the intimate details of the laws against adultery, before she committed the crime


These rules made it practically impossible to convict any woman of adultery, and in nearly every case women were acquitted. However,a Kohen
Kohen
A Kohen is the Hebrew word for priest. Jewish Kohens are traditionally believed and halachically required to be of direct patrilineal descent from the Biblical Aaron....

 (Jewish priest) was compelled to divorce his wife if she had been raped, due to the religious belief that a priest should be untainted.

Even when a woman was convicted, the punishment was comparatively mild; the death penalty (for all crimes) was abolished in 40 AD, possibly under pressure from the Roman overlords, and adulteresses were flogged instead. Nevertheless, the husbands of convicted adulteresses were not permitted by the Talmud to forgive their guilty wives, instead being compelled to divorce them; according to Maimonides
Maimonides
Moses ben-Maimon, called Maimonides and also known as Mūsā ibn Maymūn in Arabic, or Rambam , was a preeminent medieval Jewish philosopher and one of the greatest Torah scholars and physicians of the Middle Ages...

, a conviction for adultery nullified any right that the wife's marriage contract
Ketubah
A ketubah is a special type of Jewish prenuptial agreement. It is considered an integral part of a traditional Jewish marriage, and outlines the rights and responsibilities of the groom, in relation to the bride.-History:...

(Hebrew: ketubah) gave her to a compensation payment for being divorced. Once divorced, an adulteress was not permitted, according to the Talmudic writers, to marry her paramour.

As for men who committed adultery (with another man's wife), Abba ben Joseph and Abba Arika
Abba Arika
Abba Arika was a Jewish Talmudist who lived in Babylonia, known as an amora of the 3rd century who established at Sura the systematic study of the rabbinic traditions, which, using the Mishnah as text, led to the compilation of the Talmud...

 are both quoted in the Talmud as expressing abhorrence, and arguing that such men would be condemned to Gehenna
Gehenna
Gehenna , Gehinnom and Yiddish Gehinnam, are terms derived from a place outside ancient Jerusalem known in the Hebrew Bible as the Valley of the Son of Hinnom ; one of the two principal valleys surrounding the Old City.In the Hebrew Bible, the site was initially where apostate Israelites and...

.
Family purity


The laws of "family purity" (tohorat hamishpacha) are considered an important part of an Orthodox Jewish marriage and adherence to them is (in Orthodox Judaism) regarded as a prerequisite of marriage. This involves observance of the various details of the menstrual niddah
Niddah
Niddah is a Hebrew term describing a woman during menstruation, or a woman who has menstruated and not yet completed the associated requirement of immersion in a mikveh ....

 laws. Orthodox brides and grooms often attend classes on this subject prior to the wedding. The Niddah
Niddah
Niddah is a Hebrew term describing a woman during menstruation, or a woman who has menstruated and not yet completed the associated requirement of immersion in a mikveh ....

 laws are regarded as an intrinsic part of marital life (rather than just associated with women). Together with a few other rules, including those about the ejaculation of semen
Keri
Keri is a Hebrew term which literally means "happenstance", "frivolity" or "contrariness" and has come to mean "seminal emission". The term is generally used in Jewish law to refer specifically to the regulations and rituals concerning the emission of semen, whether by nocturnal emission, or by...

, these are collectively termed "family purity".
Sexual relations

Regular sexual relations are expected between husband and wife. This obligation is known as "onah." In Jewish tradition, sexual relations are the obligation of a man to his wife. Although engagement in sexual relations should be entirely at the discretion of the woman, a wife should not withhold or use sex as a negotiating ploy.

Child marriage

In Ashkenazi communities in the Middle Ages girls were married off very young in the Jewish community. Some of the rabbis in the Talmud were in favor of having boys marry as soon as they reached the age of majority. Those unmarried after the age of twenty were considered cursed by God. Torah
Torah
Torah- A scroll containing the first five books of the BibleThe Torah , is name given by Jews to the first five books of the bible—Genesis , Exodus , Leviticus , Numbers and Deuteronomy Torah- A scroll containing the first five books of the BibleThe Torah , is name given by Jews to the first five...

 study was viewed as a valid reason for delaying marriage, but life-long celibacy was discouraged. Despite the young threshold for marriage, a large age gap between the spouses was opposed. In modern times child marriage is extremely rare in the Jewish community; it is banned by law in most countries.

Intermarriage

Rates of marriage between Jews and non-Jews have increased in countries other than Israel (the Jewish diaspora
Jewish diaspora
The Jewish diaspora is the English term used to describe the Galut גלות , or 'exile', of the Jews from the region of the Kingdom of Judah and Roman Iudaea and later emigration from wider Eretz Israel....

). According to the National Jewish Population Survey 2000-01, 47% of marriages involving Jews in the United States between 1996 and 2001 were with non-Jewish partners. Jewish leaders in different branches generally agree that possible assimilation is a crisis, but they differ on the proper response to intermarriage.

Attitudes
  • All branches of Orthodox Judaism
    Orthodox Judaism
    Orthodox Judaism , is the approach to Judaism which adheres to the traditional interpretation and application of the laws and ethics of the Torah as legislated in the Talmudic texts by the Sanhedrin and subsequently developed and applied by the later authorities known as the Gaonim, Rishonim, and...

     refuse to accept any validity or legitimacy of intermarriages.
  • Conservative Judaism
    Conservative Judaism
    Conservative Judaism is a modern stream of Judaism that arose out of intellectual currents in Germany in the mid-19th century and took institutional form in the United States in the early 1900s.Conservative Judaism has its roots in the school of thought known as Positive-Historical Judaism,...

     does not sanction intermarriage, but encourages acceptance of the non-Jewish spouse within the family, hoping that such acceptance will lead to conversion.
  • Reform Judaism
    Reform Judaism
    Reform Judaism refers to various beliefs, practices and organizations associated with the Reform Jewish movement in North America, the United Kingdom and elsewhere. In general, it maintains that Judaism and Jewish traditions should be modernized and should be compatible with participation in the...

     and Reconstructionist Judaism
    Reconstructionist Judaism
    Reconstructionist Judaism is a modern American-based Jewish movement based on the ideas of Mordecai Kaplan . The movement views Judaism as a progressively evolving civilization. It originated as a branch of Conservative Judaism, before it splintered...

     permit total personal autonomy in interpretation of Jewish Law
    Halakha
    Halakha — also transliterated Halocho , or Halacha — is the collective body of Jewish law, including biblical law and later talmudic and rabbinic law, as well as customs and traditions.Judaism classically draws no distinction in its laws between religious and ostensibly non-religious life; Jewish...

    , and intermarriage is not forbidden. Reform and Reconstructionist rabbis are free to take their own approach to performing marriages between a Jewish and non-Jewish partner. Many but not all seek agreement from the couple that the children will be raised as Jewish.


There are also differences between streams on what constitutes an intermarriage, arising from their differing criteria for being Jewish in the first place. Orthodox and Conservative streams do not accept as Jewish a person whose mother is not Jewish, nor a convert whose conversion was conducted under the authority of a more liberal stream.

Marriage in Israel

Civil marriage
Civil marriage
Civil marriage is marriage performed by a government official and not a religious organization.-History:Every country maintaining a population registry of its residents keeps track of marital status, and most countries believe that it is their responsibility to register married couples. Most...

 does not exist in Israel
Israel
The State of Israel is a parliamentary republic located in the Middle East, along the eastern shore of the Mediterranean Sea...

, and the only institutionalized form of Jewish marriage is the religious one, i.e. a marriage conducted under the auspices of the rabbinate. Specifically, marriage of Israeli Jews must be conducted according to halakha
Halakha
Halakha — also transliterated Halocho , or Halacha — is the collective body of Jewish law, including biblical law and later talmudic and rabbinic law, as well as customs and traditions.Judaism classically draws no distinction in its laws between religious and ostensibly non-religious life; Jewish...

, as viewed by Orthodox Judaism. One consequence is that Jews in Israel who cannot marry according to Jewish law (e.g. a kohen
Kohen
A Kohen is the Hebrew word for priest. Jewish Kohens are traditionally believed and halachically required to be of direct patrilineal descent from the Biblical Aaron....

 and a divorcée
Divorce
Divorce is the final termination of a marital union, canceling the legal duties and responsibilities of marriage and dissolving the bonds of matrimony between the parties...

, or a Jew and one who is not halachically Jewish
Who is a Jew?
"Who is a Jew?" is a basic question about Jewish identity and considerations of Jewish self-identification. The question is based in ideas about Jewish personhood which themselves have cultural, religious, genealogical, and personal dimensions...

) cannot marry at all. This has led for calls, mostly from the secular segment of the Israeli public, for the institution of civil marriage. Many people are affected by the restrictions. In Israel in the early twenty first century there are approximately "300,000 Israelis who cannot marry because one of the partners is not Jewish, or his or her Jewishness cannot be established."

Some secular Israelis travel abroad to have civil marriages, either because they do not wish an Orthodox wedding or because their union cannot be sanctioned by halakha. These marriages are legally recognized in Israel, though not recognized by the rabbinate as Jewish.

All legal marriages performed in Israel must be carried out by religious authorities of an approved religion. Couples of different religions, or none, cannot legally marry in Israel, whether citizens or not.

Divorce

Halakha (Jewish law) allows for divorce. The document of divorce is termed a get
Get (divorce document)
A is a divorce document, which according to Jewish Law, must be presented by a husband to his wife to effect their divorce. The essential text of the is quite short: "You are hereby permitted to all men," i.e., the wife is no longer a married woman, and the laws of adultery no longer apply...

. The final divorce ceremony involves the husband giving the get document into the hand of the wife or her agent, but the wife may sue in rabbinical court to initiate the divorce. In such a case, a husband may be compelled to give the get, if he has violated any of his numerous obligations; this was traditionally accomplished by beating and or monetary coercion. The rationale was that since he was required to divorce his wife due to his (or her) violations of the contract, his good inclination really desires to divorce her, and we are only helping him to do what he wants to do anyway. In this case, the wife may or may not be entitled to a ketuba payment.

Judaism recognized the right of a wife abused physically or psychologically to a divorce at least from around the 12th century.

Conservative Judaism
Conservative Judaism
Conservative Judaism is a modern stream of Judaism that arose out of intellectual currents in Germany in the mid-19th century and took institutional form in the United States in the early 1900s.Conservative Judaism has its roots in the school of thought known as Positive-Historical Judaism,...

 follows halacha, though differently than Orthodox Judaism
Orthodox Judaism
Orthodox Judaism , is the approach to Judaism which adheres to the traditional interpretation and application of the laws and ethics of the Torah as legislated in the Talmudic texts by the Sanhedrin and subsequently developed and applied by the later authorities known as the Gaonim, Rishonim, and...

. Reform Jews usually use an egalitarian form of the Ketubah at their weddings. They generally do not issue Jewish divorces, seeing a civil divorce as both necessary and sufficient; however, some Reform rabbis encourage the couple to go through a Jewish divorce procedure. Conservative and Orthodox Judaism do not recognize civil law as overriding religious law, and thus do not view a civil divorce as sufficient. Thus, a man or woman may be considered divorced by the Reform Jewish community, but still married by the Conservative community. Orthodox Judaism does not recognize Reform weddings because, if they did, the children of a Reform woman who remarried would be considered mamzerim, the children of an adulterous relationship, a personal status that does not allow a person to marry a non-mamzer. This allows Reform Jews to become, and marry, Orthodox Jews should they choose to.

Agunah

Traditionally, when a husband fled or his whereabouts were unknown for any reason, the woman was considered an agunah
Agunah
Agunah ; literally 'anchored or chained') is a halachic term for a Jewish woman who is "chained" to her marriage. The classic case of this, is a man who has left on a journey, and has not returned, or has gone into battle and is MIA...

(literally “an anchored woman”) and was not allowed to remarry because in traditional Judaism divorce can only be initiated by the husband. Prior to modern communication death of the husband while in a distant land was a common cause of this situation. In modern times when a husband refuses to issue a get
Get (divorce document)
A is a divorce document, which according to Jewish Law, must be presented by a husband to his wife to effect their divorce. The essential text of the is quite short: "You are hereby permitted to all men," i.e., the wife is no longer a married woman, and the laws of adultery no longer apply...

 due to money, property or custody battles, the woman who cannot remarry is considered a Michuseres Get, not an agunah. A man in this situation would not be termed a Misarev Get (literally "a refuser of a divorce document") unless a valid Beis Din had required him to issue a Get. The term agunah
Agunah
Agunah ; literally 'anchored or chained') is a halachic term for a Jewish woman who is "chained" to her marriage. The classic case of this, is a man who has left on a journey, and has not returned, or has gone into battle and is MIA...

is often used in such circumstances; however, it is not technically accurate.

Within both the Conservative and Orthodox communities there are efforts to avoid situations where a woman is not able to obtain a Jewish divorce from her husband, and to deal with such problems after the fact by using various Jewish and secular legal methods. However, none of the legal solutions address the agunah problem in the case of a missing husband.

There have been reports that in order to prevent their wives from becoming Agunot, Jewish men who realized their fate during the terrorist attacks of 9/11 faxed gittim to their wives from their offices in the World Trade towers.

See also

  • Jewish wedding
    Jewish wedding
    A Jewish wedding is a wedding ceremony that follows Jewish law and traditions.While wedding ceremonies vary, common features of a Jewish wedding include a ketuba signed by two witnesses, a wedding canopy , a ring owned by the groom that is given to the bride under the canopy, and the breaking of a...

  • Negiah
    Negiah
    Negiah , literally "touch," is the concept in Halakha that forbids or restricts physical contact with a member of the opposite sex...

     (guidelines for physical contact)
  • Niddah
    Niddah
    Niddah is a Hebrew term describing a woman during menstruation, or a woman who has menstruated and not yet completed the associated requirement of immersion in a mikveh ....

     (ritual purity laws)
  • Shalom bayit
    Shalom bayit
    Shalom bayit is the Jewish religious concept of domestic harmony and good relations between husband and wife. In a Jewish court of law, shalom bayit is the Hebrew term for marital reconciliation...

     (peace and harmony in the relationship between husband and wife)
  • Shidduch
    Shidduch
    The Shidduch is a system of matchmaking in which Jewish singles are introduced to one another in Orthodox Jewish communities for the purpose of marriage....

     (finding a marriage partner)
  • Yichud
    Yichud
    The prohibition of yichud , in Halakha is the impermissibility of seclusion of a man and a woman who are not married to each other in a private area. Such seclusion is prohibited in order to prevent the two from being tempted or having the opportunity to commit adulterous or promiscuous acts.The...

     (prohibitions of seclusion with the opposite sex)
  • Women in Judaism
The source of this article is wikipedia, the free encyclopedia.  The text of this article is licensed under the GFDL.
 
x
OK