Jewish wedding
Encyclopedia
While wedding ceremonies vary, common features of a Jewish wedding include a ketuba (marriage contract) signed by two witnesses, a wedding canopy (chuppah or huppah), a ring owned by the groom that is given to the bride under the canopy, and the breaking of a glass.
Technically, the Jewish wedding process has two distinct stages: kiddushin
Erusin
Erusin is the Hebrew term for betrothal. In modern Hebrew, "erusin" means engagement, but this is not the historical meaning of the term, which is the first part of marriage ....
(sanctification or dedication, also called erusin, betrothal in Hebrew) and nissuin (marriage), when the couple start their life together. The first stage prohibits the woman to all other men, requiring a religious divorce
Get (divorce document)
A is a divorce document, which according to Jewish Law, must be presented by a husband to his wife to effect their divorce. The essential text of the is quite short: "You are hereby permitted to all men," i.e., the wife is no longer a married woman, and the laws of adultery no longer apply...
to dissolve, and the final stage permits the couple to each other. The ceremony that accomplishes nisuin is known as chuppah
Chuppah
A chuppah , also huppah, chupah, or chuppa, is a canopy under which a Jewish couple stand during their wedding ceremony. It consists of a cloth or sheet, sometimes a tallit, stretched or supported over four poles, or sometimes manually held up by attendants to the ceremony. A chuppah symbolizes the...
.
Today, erusin/kiddushin occurs when the woman accepts a ring or other object of value with the intent of creating a marriage. There are differing opinions as to which part of the ceremony, constitutes nissuin/chuppah; they include standing under the canopy - itself called a chuppah - and being alone together in a room (yichud
Yichud
The prohibition of yichud , in Halakha is the impermissibility of seclusion of a man and a woman who are not married to each other in a private area. Such seclusion is prohibited in order to prevent the two from being tempted or having the opportunity to commit adulterous or promiscuous acts.The...
). While historically these two events could take place as much as a year apart, they are now commonly combined into one ceremony.
Signing of the marriage contract
Before the wedding ceremony, the ketubah, or marriage contract, is signed in the presence of two witnesses. The ketubah details the husband's obligations to his wife, among which are food, clothing, and marital relations. This document has the standing of a legally binding agreement. It is often written as an illuminated manuscript that is framed and displayed in their home. Under the chuppa, it is traditional to read the signed ketubahKetubah
A ketubah is a special type of Jewish prenuptial agreement. It is considered an integral part of a traditional Jewish marriage, and outlines the rights and responsibilities of the groom, in relation to the bride.-History:...
aloud, usually in the Aramaic original, but sometimes in translation. Traditionally, this is done to separate the two basic parts of the wedding. Secular couples may opt for a shortened version to be read out.
Bridal canopy
A traditional Jewish wedding ceremony takes place under a ChuppahChuppah
A chuppah , also huppah, chupah, or chuppa, is a canopy under which a Jewish couple stand during their wedding ceremony. It consists of a cloth or sheet, sometimes a tallit, stretched or supported over four poles, or sometimes manually held up by attendants to the ceremony. A chuppah symbolizes the...
or wedding canopy, symbolizing the new home being built by the couple when they become husband and wife.
Covering of the bride
Prior to the ceremony, Ashkenazi Jews have a custom to cover the face of the bride (usually with a veil), and a prayer is often said for her based on the words spoken to Rebecca in Genesis 24:60. The veiling ritual is known in Yiddish as badekenBadeken
Badeken, Bedeken, Badekenish, or Bedekung , is the ceremony where the groom veils the bride in a Jewish wedding....
. Various reasons are given for the veil and the ceremony. Sephardic Jews do not perform this ceremony.
Unterfirers
In many communities, the groom is led under the chuppahChuppah
A chuppah , also huppah, chupah, or chuppa, is a canopy under which a Jewish couple stand during their wedding ceremony. It consists of a cloth or sheet, sometimes a tallit, stretched or supported over four poles, or sometimes manually held up by attendants to the ceremony. A chuppah symbolizes the...
by the two fathers and the bride by the two mothers, known as untefirers (lit. ones who lead under).
Encircling the groom
The bride traditionally walks around the groom three or seven times when she arrives at the ChuppahChuppah
A chuppah , also huppah, chupah, or chuppa, is a canopy under which a Jewish couple stand during their wedding ceremony. It consists of a cloth or sheet, sometimes a tallit, stretched or supported over four poles, or sometimes manually held up by attendants to the ceremony. A chuppah symbolizes the...
. This may derive from Jeremiah 31:22, “A woman shall surround a man”. The three circuits may represent the three virtues of marriage: righteousness, justice and loving kindness (see Hosea 2:21). Seven circuits derives from the Biblical concept that seven denotes perfection or completeness. Sephardic Jews do not perform this ceremony.
Presentation of the ring (Betrothal)
In traditional weddings, two blessings are recited before the betrothal; a blessing over wine, and the betrothal blessing, which is specified in the Talmud. The wine is then tasted by the couple.The groom gives the bride a ring, traditionally a plain wedding band, and recites the declaration: Behold, you are consecrated to me with this ring according to the law of Moses and Israel. The groom places the ring on the bride’s right index finger. According to traditional Jewish law, two valid witnesses must see him place the ring.
During some egalitarian weddings, the bride will also present a ring to the groom, often with a quote from the Song of Songs: "Ani l'dodi, ve dodi li" (I am my beloved's and my beloved is mine), which may also be inscribed on the ring itself. This ring is sometimes presented outside the chuppa to avoid conflicts with Jewish law.
Seven blessings
The Sheva BrachotSheva Brachot
Sheva Brachot literally "the seven blessings" also known as birkot Nesuim , "the wedding blessings" in Jewish religious law are blessings that are recited for a bride and her groom as part of nissuim...
or seven blessings are recited by the hazzan
Hazzan
A hazzan or chazzan is a Jewish cantor, a musician trained in the vocal arts who helps lead the congregation in songful prayer.There are many rules relating to how a cantor should lead services, but the idea of a cantor as a paid professional does not exist in classical rabbinic sources...
or rabbi
Rabbi
In Judaism, a rabbi is a teacher of Torah. This title derives from the Hebrew word רבי , meaning "My Master" , which is the way a student would address a master of Torah...
, or by select guests who are called up individually. Being called upon to recite one of the seven blessings is considered an honor. The groom is given the cup of wine drink from after the seven blessings. The bride also drinks the wine. In some traditions, the cup will be held to the lips of the groom by his new father-in-law and to the lips of the bride by her new mother-in-law. Traditions vary as to whether additional songs are sung before the seven blessings.
Breaking the glass
After the bride has been given the ring, or at the end of the ceremony (depending on local custom), the groom breaks a glass, crushing it with his right foot, and the guests shout "Mazel tov!" ("Good luck"). At some contemporary weddings, a lightbulb may be substituted because it is thinner and more easily broken, and it makes a louder popping sound.The origin of this custom is unknown, although many reasons have been given. The primary reason is that joy must always be tempered. This is based on two accounts in the Talmud of rabbis who, upon seeing that their son's wedding celebration was getting out of hand, broke a vessel - in the second case a glass - to calm things down. Another explanation is that it is a reminder that despite the joy, Jews still mourn the destruction of the Temple in Jerusalem
Temple in Jerusalem
The Temple in Jerusalem or Holy Temple , refers to one of a series of structures which were historically located on the Temple Mount in the Old City of Jerusalem, the current site of the Dome of the Rock. Historically, these successive temples stood at this location and functioned as the centre of...
. Because of this, some recite the verses "If I forget thee / O Jerusalem..." at this point. Many other reasons have been given by traditional authorities.
Former Sephardic Chief Rabbi of Israel Ovadia Yosef
Ovadia Yosef
Ovadia Yosef is the former Sephardi Chief Rabbi of Israel, a recognised Talmudic scholar and foremost halakhic authority.He currently serves as the spiritual leader of the Shas political party in the Israeli parliament...
has strongly criticized this custom, arguing that "Many unknowledgeable people fill their mouths with laughter during the breaking of the glass, shouting 'mazel tov' and turning a beautiful custom meant to express our sorrow" over Jerusalem's destruction "into an opportunity for lightheadedness." http://www.israelnationalnews.com/News/News.aspx/135988
Yichud
YichudYichud
The prohibition of yichud , in Halakha is the impermissibility of seclusion of a man and a woman who are not married to each other in a private area. Such seclusion is prohibited in order to prevent the two from being tempted or having the opportunity to commit adulterous or promiscuous acts.The...
(Hebrew for "togetherness" or "seclusion") refers to the Ashkenazi practice of leaving the bride and groom alone for 10–20 minutes after the wedding ceremony. The couple retreats to a private room. Yichud can take place anywhere, from a rabbi's study to a synagogue classroom. The reason for yichud is that according to several authorities, standing under the canopy alone does not constitute chuppah, and seclusion is necessary to complete the wedding ceremony. However, Sephardic Jews do not have this custom, as they consider it a davar mechoar, a "repugnant thing", compromising the couple's modesty.
Special dances
Dancing is a major feature of Jewish wedding. It is customary for the guests to dance in front of the seated couple and entertain them. Traditional dances include:- The Krenzl, in which the bride's mother is crowned with a wreath of flowers as her daughters dance around her (traditionally at the wedding of the mother's last unwed daughter).
- The Mizinke, a dance for the parents of the bride or groom when their last child is wed.
- The "HoraHoraHora is a type of circle dance originating in the Balkans but also found in other countries. The name is cognate to the Greek χορός : 'dance' which is cognate with the ancient Greek art form of χορεία; see Chorea. The original meaning of the Greek word χορός may have been 'circle'...
" is a Middle Eastern/Israeli style dance usually played as a second dance set. - The gladdening of the bride, in which guests dance around the bride, and can include the use of "shtick"—silly items such as signs, banners, costumes, confetti, and jump ropes made of table napkins.
- The Mitzvah tantz, in which family members and honored rabbis are invited to dance in front of the bride (or sometimes with the bride in the case of a father or grandfather), often holding a gartelGartelThe Gartel is a belt used by Jewish males, predominantly but not exclusively, Hasidim during prayer. "Gartel" is Yiddish for "belt". The word comes from the German "Gürtel", which is also the root word for the English "girdle", as well as the word "girt"....
, and then dancing with the groom. At the end the bride and groom dance together themselves.
Birkat hamazon and sheva brakhot
After the meal, Birkat HamazonBirkat Hamazon
Birkat Hamazon or Birkath Hammazon, , known in English as the Grace After Meals, , is a set of Hebrew blessings that Jewish Law prescribes following a meal that includes bread or matzoh made from one or all of wheat, barley, rye, oats, spelt...
(Grace after meals) is recited, followed by sheva brachot
Sheva Brachot
Sheva Brachot literally "the seven blessings" also known as birkot Nesuim , "the wedding blessings" in Jewish religious law are blessings that are recited for a bride and her groom as part of nissuim...
. At a wedding banquet, the wording of the blessings preceding Birkat Hamazon is slightly different from the everyday version. Prayer booklets called benchers, may be handed out to guests. After the prayers, the blessing over the wine is recited, with two glasses of wine poured together into a third, symbolizing the creation of a new life together.