Sourced

• As long as people will accept crap, it will be financially profitable to dispense it.
  • quoted in Playboy magazine, 1971

Attributed

• If your parents never had children, chances are you won't either.

• It's a rare person who wants to hear what he doesn't want to hear.

• There's so much comedy on television. Does that cause comedy in the streets?** mocking the TV-violence debate

• Why don't you fold it five ways and put it where the moon don't shine! (in response to Norman Mailer's "Why don't you just read the next question on your card there?")

• His English is just fine. (in response to Sophia Loren's insistence that it was only because of a misunderstanding of English usage that Marcello Mastroianni said "To be a Latin Lover a man, above all, has to be a great fucker - he has to be infallible and I'm not that. I often foul it up.")