The Exit of Battling Billson
Encyclopedia
"The Exit of Battling Billson" is a short story
Short story
A short story is a work of fiction that is usually written in prose, often in narrative format. This format tends to be more pointed than longer works of fiction, such as novellas and novels. Short story definitions based on length differ somewhat, even among professional writers, in part because...

 by P. G. Wodehouse
P. G. Wodehouse
Sir Pelham Grenville Wodehouse, KBE was an English humorist, whose body of work includes novels, short stories, plays, poems, song lyrics, and numerous pieces of journalism. He enjoyed enormous popular success during a career that lasted more than seventy years and his many writings continue to be...

, which first appeared in the United States
United States
The United States of America is a federal constitutional republic comprising fifty states and a federal district...

 in the December 1923 issue of Cosmopolitan
Cosmopolitan (magazine)
Cosmopolitan is an international magazine for women. It was first published in 1886 in the United States as a family magazine, was later transformed into a literary magazine and eventually became a women's magazine in the late 1960s...

and in the United Kingdom
United Kingdom
The United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern IrelandIn the United Kingdom and Dependencies, other languages have been officially recognised as legitimate autochthonous languages under the European Charter for Regional or Minority Languages...

 in the January 1924 Strand
Strand Magazine
The Strand Magazine was a monthly magazine composed of fictional stories and factual articles founded by George Newnes. It was first published in the United Kingdom from January 1891 to March 1950 running to 711 issues, though the first issue was on sale well before Christmas 1890.Its immediate...

. It features the irrepressible Stanley Featherstonehaugh Ukridge
Stanley Featherstonehaugh Ukridge
Stanley Featherstonehaugh Ukridge is a fictional character from the short stories and novels of P. G. Wodehouse.Ukridge is a schemer who will do anything to increase his funding -- except, of course, work. An alert and creative opportunist, he makes sure that no kindness shown to him, however...

, and was included in the collection Ukridge
Ukridge (short stories)
Ukridge is a collection of short stories by P.G. Wodehouse, first published in the United Kingdom on June 3, 1924 by Herbert Jenkins, London, and in the United States on March 19, 1926 by George H. Doran, New York, under the title He Rather Enjoyed It....

, published in 1924.

Main characters

  • Stanley Featherstonehaugh Ukridge
    Stanley Featherstonehaugh Ukridge
    Stanley Featherstonehaugh Ukridge is a fictional character from the short stories and novels of P. G. Wodehouse.Ukridge is a schemer who will do anything to increase his funding -- except, of course, work. An alert and creative opportunist, he makes sure that no kindness shown to him, however...

    , the irrepressible entrepreneur
  • Jimmy Corcoran, Ukridge's writer friend
  • "Battling" Billson, a boxer sometimes manages by Ukridge
  • Lloyd Thomas, a famous Welsh boxer
  • Izzy Previn, aka Isaac o'Brien, Ukridge's untrustworthy business partner

Plot

Corky is in the Welsh
Wales
Wales is a country that is part of the United Kingdom and the island of Great Britain, bordered by England to its east and the Atlantic Ocean and Irish Sea to its west. It has a population of three million, and a total area of 20,779 km²...

 town of "Llunindnno" to report on the emergence of a popular revivalist speaker, and is amazed to run into Ukridge outside a theatre - he has been ejected for attacking a man who had stolen his seat, attempting to lift him out by the ears. Ukridge is in town to promote a boxing
Boxing
Boxing, also called pugilism, is a combat sport in which two people fight each other using their fists. Boxing is supervised by a referee over a series of between one to three minute intervals called rounds...

 match between a local man and "Battling" Billson, this time as manager of the affair, sharing the ticket sales with his partner from his failed bookmaking enterprise
The Long Arm of Looney Coote
"The Long Arm of Looney Coote" is a short story by P. G. Wodehouse, which first appeared in the United States in the November 1923 issue of Cosmopolitan and in the United Kingdom in the December 1923 Strand...

.

Corky attends the stirring revivalist meeting, and later meets Billson, who was also at the meeting. Billson, swayed by the speaker, has become an advocate of teetotalism
Teetotalism
Teetotalism refers to either the practice of or the promotion of complete abstinence from alcoholic beverages. A person who practices teetotalism is called a teetotaler or is simply said to be teetotal...

 and non-violence
Pacifism
Pacifism is the opposition to war and violence. The term "pacifism" was coined by the French peace campaignerÉmile Arnaud and adopted by other peace activists at the tenth Universal Peace Congress inGlasgow in 1901.- Definition :...

, and has been dispruting drinkers in local pubs. Ukridge, dismayed that Billson refuses to fight, intends to take his place, having made an agreement with the other boxer that he will treat Ukridge gently. When they meet, however, Ukridge recognises the boxer as the man whose ears he pulled.

Sure the other man will break his word, Ukridge is petrified, but when the fight seems to be going well, he assumes the other is merely a poor fighter. When Ukridge hits the other man's nose, breaking the central clause of their deal, the Welshman lets loose, and is on the verge of destroying Ukridge when Billson steps into the ring, determined to end the violence. Ukridge runs off as Billson, enraged by the booing crowd and a few punches from the Welshman, launches into a spectacular fight.

The Welshman's agent arrives at Ukridge's house to collect the money owed, but Ukridge's partner has fled with the takings. When all looks black, Billson arrives, confirming the partner has fled, but carrying the bag of money, which he took from the fleeing man. He hands it over to Ukridge, and strolls off to spread the light.

See also

  • List of Wodehouse's Ukridge stories
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