Miss Susie
Encyclopedia
Miss Susie is the name of an American schoolyard rhyme
Children's song
Children's song may be a nursery rhyme set to music, a song that young children invent and share among themselves, or a modern creation intended for entertainment, use in the home, or education...

 and clapping game
Clapping game
A clapping game is a type of usually cooperative game which is generally played by two players and involves clapping as accompaniment to a singing game or reciting of a rhyme...

 in which almost each verse leads up to a rude word or profanity
Profanity
Profanity is a show of disrespect, or a desecration or debasement of someone or something. Profanity can take the form of words, expressions, gestures, or other social behaviors that are socially constructed or interpreted as insulting, rude, vulgar, obscene, desecrating, or other forms.The...

 which is elided into the next verse as part of an innocuous word or phrase. Sometimes various hand signs accompany the song, such as making a phone with one's hand at "hello operator." As with other clapping games, it is almost exclusively practiced by pre-pubescent girls.

It has also gained popularity in English primary schools known as When Maxie, as in When Maxie was a baby.

Structure

The rhyme in arranged in couplet
Couplet
A couplet is a pair of lines of meter in poetry. It usually consists of two lines that rhyme and have the same meter.While traditionally couplets rhyme, not all do. A poem may use white space to mark out couplets if they do not rhyme. Couplets with a meter of iambic pentameter are called heroic...

s, with a A-B / C-B rhyme scheme. The rhyme is organized by its meter, which is in sprung rhythm
Sprung rhythm
Sprung rhythm is a poetic rhythm designed to imitate the rhythm of natural speech. It is constructed from feet in which the first syllable is stressed and may be followed by a variable number of unstressed syllables...

 with trimeter
Trimeter
In poetry, a trimeter is a metre of three metrical feet per line—example:...

. Accentual verse
Accentual verse
Accentual verse has a fixed number of stresses per line or stanza regardless of the number of syllables that are present. It is common in languages that are stress-timed, such as English—as opposed to syllabic verse, which is common in syllable-timed languages, such as French.- Children's poetry...

 (including sprung rhythm
Sprung rhythm
Sprung rhythm is a poetic rhythm designed to imitate the rhythm of natural speech. It is constructed from feet in which the first syllable is stressed and may be followed by a variable number of unstressed syllables...

) is a common form in English folk verse, including nursery rhyme
Nursery rhyme
The term nursery rhyme is used for "traditional" poems for young children in Britain and many other countries, but usage only dates from the 19th century and in North America the older ‘Mother Goose Rhymes’ is still often used.-Lullabies:...

s and skipping-rope rhyme
Skipping-rope rhyme
A skipping rhyme , is a rhyme chanted by children while skipping. Such rhymes have been recorded in all cultures where skipping is played. Examples of English-language rhymes have been found going back to at least the 17th century...

s. The rhyme approaches taboo
Taboo
A taboo is a strong social prohibition relating to any area of human activity or social custom that is sacred and or forbidden based on moral judgment, religious beliefs and or scientific consensus. Breaking the taboo is usually considered objectionable or abhorrent by society...

 words, only to cut them off and modify them with an enjambment
Enjambment
Enjambment or enjambement is the breaking of a syntactic unit by the end of a line or between two verses. It is to be contrasted with end-stopping, where each linguistic unit corresponds with a single line, and caesura, in which the linguistic unit ends mid-line...

. It shares much of the same melody as "The Merry-Go-Round Broke Down
The Merry-Go-Round Broke Down
"The Merry-Go-Round Broke Down" is a song written in 1937 by Cliff Friend and Dave Franklin. It is best known as the theme tune for the Looney Tunes cartoon series produced by Warner Bros...

" (best known as the opening theme song of Merrie Melodies
Merrie Melodies
Merrie Melodies is the name of a series of animated cartoons distributed by Warner Bros. Pictures between 1931 and 1969.Originally produced by Harman-Ising Pictures, Merrie Melodies were produced by Leon Schlesinger Productions from 1933 to 1944. Schlesinger sold his studio to Warner Bros. in 1944,...

 cartoons).

History

The rhyme has developed in many regional variations over an extended period, as is common for such rhymes. The earliest known form is from the 1950s in Michigan
Michigan
Michigan is a U.S. state located in the Great Lakes Region of the United States of America. The name Michigan is the French form of the Ojibwa word mishigamaa, meaning "large water" or "large lake"....

, and consists of the four lines:
Hellen had a steamboat, the steamboat had a bell.
Hellen took some dynamite and blew the bell to Hell
O operator, give me number nine,
If it doesn’t answer, give me back my dime.

Later versions developed by embellishment, with other versions adding and removing stanzas including kissing, boys zipping up their flies, a little black boy, and bras, while the initial "... boat, ... bell / ..., ... Hell / -o ... number nine / If ..." has remained stable, though with variations in the details.

Pop culture

The rhyme is sometimes referenced in popular culture:
  • Bob Saget
    Bob Saget
    Robert Lane "Bob" Saget is an American stand-up comedian, actor, and television host. Although he is best known for his roles as Danny Tanner in Full House, host of America's Funniest Home Videos and Future Ted Mosby on How I Met Your Mother, Saget is also known outside of television for his blue...

     sings a similar song at the end of his live comedy act.
  • In the White Stripes song "Hello Operator" (on the album De Stijl
    De Stijl (album)
    De Stijl is the second studio album by the American garage rock band The White Stripes, released on June 20, 2000 on Sympathy for the Record Industry. The album reached number thirty-eight on Billboards Independent Albums chart in 2002, when The White Stripes' popularity began to grow...

    ): "Hello operator / Can you give me number nine? / Can I see you later? / Can you give me back my dime?"
  • In the Self
    Self (band)
    Self is an American alternative pop/rock band from Murfreesboro, Tennessee and largely the brainchild of writer, singer, producer, and multi-instrumentalist Matt Mahaffey....

     song "Pattycake" (a reminiscence of the narrator's 1970s childhood, on the album Gizmodgery
    Gizmodgery
    Gizmodgery is the fifth album by alternative pop/rock band Self, released in 2000 by Spongebath Records. The LP was recorded entirely with children's toy instruments....

    , which was performed using only children's toy instruments): Verses 2 through 4 and a modified version of verse 5 as a bridge
    Bridge (music)
    In music, especially western popular music, a bridge is a contrasting section which also prepares for the return of the original material section...

    .
  • In The Simpsons
    The Simpsons
    The Simpsons is an American animated sitcom created by Matt Groening for the Fox Broadcasting Company. The series is a satirical parody of a middle class American lifestyle epitomized by its family of the same name, which consists of Homer, Marge, Bart, Lisa and Maggie...

     episode Bart Sells His Soul
    Bart Sells His Soul
    "Bart Sells His Soul" is the fourth episode of The Simpsons seventh season. It first aired in the United States on the Fox network, on October 8, 1995. In the episode, Bart pranks churchgoers by replacing the music to a hymn with a psychedelic rock song, so Reverend Lovejoy forces him and Milhouse...

    , Sherri and Terri chant, "Bart sold his soul, and that's just swell / Now he's going straight to / Hello operator / give me number nine" in Bart
    Bart Simpson
    Bartholomew JoJo "Bart" Simpson is a fictional main character in the animated television series The Simpsons and part of the Simpson family. He is voiced by actress Nancy Cartwright and first appeared on television in The Tracey Ullman Show short "Good Night" on April 19, 1987...

    's nightmare. And in Fat Man and Little Boy
    Fat Man and Little Boy (The Simpsons episode)
    "Fat Man and Little Boy" is the fifth episode of sixteenth season of The Simpsons and the last episode of 2004.-Plot:After attacking Lisa with spitballs, Bart finds out his last baby tooth is loose. After some failed attempts in getting it out, Bart's tooth comes out when Marge forces a drawer open...

    , Lisa
    Lisa Simpson
    Lisa Marie Simpson is a fictional main character in the animated television series The Simpsons. She is the middle child of the Simpson family. Voiced by Yeardley Smith, Lisa first appeared on television in The Tracey Ullman Show short "Good Night" on April 19, 1987. Cartoonist Matt Groening...

     and her friend Janey recite this rhyme. An eavesdropping Homer
    Homer Simpson
    Homer Jay Simpson is a fictional character in the animated television series The Simpsons and the patriarch of the eponymous family. He is voiced by Dan Castellaneta and first appeared on television, along with the rest of his family, in The Tracey Ullman Show short "Good Night" on April 19, 1987...

     gasps whenever he expects profanity and lets out sighs of relief when they turn out to be innocuous.
  • On According to Jim
    According to Jim
    According to Jim is an American sitcom television series starring Jim Belushi in the title role as a suburban father of three children. It originally ran on ABC from October 3, 2001 to June 2, 2009.-Synopsis:Jim is an abrasive but lovable suburban father...

     in the episode The Bachelor Jim and Andy sing Miss Susie (omitting the first verse) while accompanying the song with the piano and the harmonica.
  • In the episode "Something You Can Do with Your Finger
    Something You Can Do with Your Finger
    "Something You Can Do with Your Finger" is the eight episode of the fourth season of the animated television series South Park, and the 56th episode of the series overall...

    " from the fourth season of South Park
    South Park
    South Park is an American animated television series created by Trey Parker and Matt Stone for the Comedy Central television network. Intended for mature audiences, the show has become famous for its crude language, surreal, satirical, and dark humor that lampoons a wide range of topics...

    , Wendy Testaburger sings a parody song starting with "Ms. Landers".
  • On Rocko's Modern Life
    Rocko's Modern Life
    Rocko's Modern Life is an animated series created by Joe Murray. The show aired for four seasons between 1993 and 1996 on Nickelodeon. Rocko's Modern Life is based around the surreal, parodic adventures of an anthropomorphic wallaby named Rocko, and his life in the city of O-Town...

    , Rocko and Heffer Wolfe
    Heffer Wolfe
    Heffer Wolfe is a fictional character on the cartoon Rocko's Modern Life and the comic book series of the same name. Tom Kenny provided the voice of the anthropomorphic steer...

     sing the first few bars of the song on a car trip.
  • On Hey Arnold, the song was the center of an entire episode. (Version 3, below)
  • Jibjab
    JibJab
    JibJab is a digital entertainment studio based in Venice, California. Founded in 1999 by Evan and Gregg Spiridellis, it was noticed during the 2004 US presidential election when their video of George W. Bush and John Kerry singing "This Land is Your Land" became a hit. The company creates,...

    's 2008 Year in Review was set to the song and featured a similar lyrical concept, for instance "When the maverick
    John McCain
    John Sidney McCain III is the senior United States Senator from Arizona. He was the Republican nominee for president in the 2008 United States election....

     tapped a hockey mom
    Sarah Palin
    Sarah Louise Palin is an American politician, commentator and author. As the Republican Party nominee for Vice President in the 2008 presidential election, she was the first Alaskan on the national ticket of a major party and first Republican woman nominated for the vice-presidency.She was...

     the press said, 'What the...' Truck bombs in Islamabad
    Islamabad
    Islamabad is the capital of Pakistan and the tenth largest city in the country. Located within the Islamabad Capital Territory , the population of the city has grown from 100,000 in 1951 to 1.7 million in 2011...

    ", etc.
  • In the Emilie Autumn
    Emilie Autumn
    Emilie Autumn Liddell , better known by her stage name Emilie Autumn, is an American singer-songwriter, poet, and violinist. Autumn draws influence for her music—the style of which she has alternatively labeled as "Victoriandustrial" and glam rock—from plays, novels, and history, particularly the...

    song "Miss Lucy Had Some Leeches," the concept of seemingly dark/profane phrases turning into innocuous words is taken further, although sung in the same style and tune as the original. Example lyric: "Miss Lucy had some leeches/ Her leeches liked to suck/ And when they drank up all her blood she didn't give a/ Funny when the doctors..."

Lyrics

Numerous versions exist, varying across time and regionally. A sampling include the following:
Version 1 Version 2 Version 3 Version 4 Version 5 Version 6 Version 7 Version 8

Miss Susie had a steamboat

The steamboat had a bell

(toot toot)

Miss Susie went to heaven

The steamboat went to...


Hello operator

give me number nine

And if you disconnect me

I'll kick you from...


Behind the frigerator

There was a piece of glass

Miss Susie fell upon it

And hurt her big fat...


Ask me no more questions

Tell me no more lies

The cow are in the meadow

making chocolate pies


Flies are in the meadow

The bees are in the hive

Miss Susie and her boyfriend

Are kissing in the...


D-A-R-K D-A-R-K dark dark dark


Dark is like a movie

A movie's like a show

A show is like a T.V. set

And that is all ...


I Know I know my ma,

I know I know my pa,

I know I know my sister,

With the forty acre bra.


I wish I had a nickel

I wish I had a dime

I wish I had a boyfriend

who kissed me all the time


My Ma gave me a nickel

my Pa gave me a dime

my Sister gave me a boyfriend

Who'd kiss me all the time


My Ma took back the nickel

my Pa took back the dime

my Sister took back her boyfriend

and gave me Frankenstein


He made me wash the dishes

He made me wash the floors

He made me wash his underwear

So I kicked him out the door


I kicked him over London

I kicked him over France

I kicked him to Hawaii

where he learned to Hula dance!

Miss Susie had a steamboat

The steamboat had a bell

Miss Susie went to heaven

The steamboat went to...


Hello operator

Please give me number nine

And if you disconnect me

I'll kick you from...


Behind the frigerator

There was a piece of glass

Miss Susie fell upon it

And broke her little...


Ask me no more questions

Tell me no more lies

Miss Susie told me all this

The day before she ...


Dyed her hair all purple

Dyed her hair all green

Dyed her hair all purple,

And washed it down the stream

Miss Susie had a tugboat

The tugboat had a bell

Miss Susie went to heaven

The tugboat went to...


Hello operator

Please Give me number nine

And if you disconnect me

I'll kick you in the...


Behind the frigerator

There was a piece of glass

Miss Susie fell upon it

And broke her big fat...


Ask me no more questions

Tell me no more lies

The boys are in the bathroom

Zipping up their...

Flies are the meadow

The bees are in the park

The boys and girls are kissing

Way past after dar-ar-ar-ar-ark!

Miss Suzie had a steamboat

The steamboat had a bell

The steamboat went to Heaven

Miss Suzie went to...

Hello operator

Please give me number 9

And if you disconnect me

I'll chop off your...

Behind the fridgerator

There lay a piece of glass

Miss Suzie fell upon it

And it went straight up her...

Ask me no more questions

Tell me no more lies

The boys are in the girlsroom

Pulling down their...

Flies are in the meadow

The bees are in the park

Miss Suzie and her boyfriend

Are kissing in the...

D-A-R-K D-A-R-K

D-A-R-K,

Dark is like a movie

A movie's like a show

A show is like a radio

And that is all...

I know I know my Ma

I know I know my Pop

I know I know my sister

With the polka dotted bra..

(Brother)'s like a sister

My mom said not to tell,

She said I'll go to heaven

But he might go to...

Hello operator

Please give me number ten

And if you disconnect me

I’ll sing this song again!

Miss Suzie had a tugboat

The tugboat had a bell (ding ding)

Miss Suzie went to Heaven

The tugboat went to...


Hello Operator

Please give me number nine

And if you disconnect me

I'll kick you right...


Behind the fridgerator

There laid a piece of glass

Miss Suzie fell upon it

And broke her little...


Ask me no more questions

Please tell me no more lies

Miss Suzie told me this

The day before she...


Died her hair in purple

She died her hair in pink

She died her hair in polka dots

And washed it down the...


Sink me in the ocean

Sink me in the sea

Sink me in the toilet

But please don't pee on me me me!

Miss Susie had a tugboat

The tugboat had a bell

Miss Susie went to heaven

The tugboat went to...


Hello Operator!

Give me number nine

And if you disconnect me

I'll kick you from behind...


The fridgerator

laid a piece of glass

Miss Susie sat upon it

And broke her little...


Ask me no more questions!

Tell me no more lies

The boys are in the bathroom

Zipping up their...


Flies are in the meadow

The bees are in the park

Miss Susie and her boyfriend

are kissing in the

D-A-R-K D-A-R-K

Dark, dark

Darker than the ocean

Darker than the sea

Darker than the underwear my mommy puts on me

My mommy is Godzilla

My daddy is King Kong

My sister is the stupid one who taught me this dumb song


Hello Operator

Give me number ten

If you disconnect me

I'll sing this song again *BEEP*

Miss Susie had a steamboat

The steamboat had a bell

Miss Susie went to heaven

The steamboat went to


HELLO operator

Give me number nine

If you disconnect me

I'll kick you in the


BEHIND the refrigerator

There was a piece of glass

Miss Susie sat upon it

And broke her little


ASK me no more questions

Tell me no more lies

The boys are in the girls' room

Zipping down their


FLIES are in the meadow

Bees are in the park

Miss Susie's in the driveway,

Kissing in the

D-A-R-K D-A-R-K DARK!

(from circa 1999)

Miss Suzie had a steamboat

The steamboat had a bell (toot toot)

Miss Suzie went to Heaven and the steamboat went to


Hello operator

Get me number 9

And if you disconnect me

I'll chop off your


Behind the fridgerator

There sat a piece of glass

Miss Suzie sat upon it

And broke her little


Ask me no more questions

Tell me no more lies

The boys are in the bathrooom

Zipping up their


Flies are in the meadow

The bees are in the park

Miss Suzie and her boyfriend

Are kissing in the


D-A-R-K

D-A-R-K

Dark dark dark


Is like a movie

A movie's like a show

A show is like a tv set

And that is all I know


I know I know my ma

I know I know my pa

I know I know my sister

With the 80-acre bra


My ma is godzilla

My pa is king kong

My sister is the silly one

Who doesn't know this song


A song is like a rhythm

A rhythm's like a beat

A beet is like a vegetable

That you can really eat eat eat


You eat with your silverware

Your silverware your silverware

You eat with your silverware

And not with your underwear!
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