John Gottman
Encyclopedia
John Mordecai Gottman is a Ph.D.
psychologist
known for his work on marital
stability and relationship analysis through scientific direct observations published in peer-reviewed literature. The lessons derived from this work represent a partial basis for the relationship counseling
movement which aim to improve relationship functioning and the avoidance of those behaviors shown by Gottman and other researchers to harm human relationships. Dr. Gottman is a Professor Emeritus of psychology at the University of Washington
. With his wife Dr. Julie Schwartz, Gottman heads a non-profit research institute (The Relationship Research Institute) and a for-profit therapist training entity (The Gottman Institute).
's method of analyzing human emotion and microexpression
s.
The predictive power of Gottman's models, however, is disputed. Journalist Laurie Abraham writes, "What Gottman did wasn't really a prediction of the future but a formula built after the couples' outcomes were already known. This isn't to say that developing such formulas isn't a valuable—indeed, a critical—first step in being able to make a prediction. The next step, however—one absolutely required by the scientific method—is to apply your equation to a fresh sample to see whether it actually works. That is especially necessary with small data slices (such as 57 couples), because patterns that appear important are more likely to be mere flukes. But Gottman never did that." The Gottman Relationship Institute claims that 6 of 7 of Gottman's studies have been properly predictive, by the standard that the predictors, but not their specific relationship to the outcome, were selected in advance.
However, Gottman's 2002 paper makes no claims to accuracy in terms of binary classification, and is instead a regression analysis
of a two factor model where skin conductance levels and oral history narratives encodings are the only two statistically significant variables. Facial expressions using Ekman's encoding scheme were not statistically significant.
, defensiveness, stonewalling, and contempt
. Among these four, Gottman considers contempt the most important of them all.
. He has outlined seven principles that will reinforce the positive aspects of a relationship and help marriages endure during the rough moments.
Research Scientist Awards, the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy
Distinguished Research Scientist Award, the American Family Therapy Academy Award for Most Distinguished Contributor to Family Systems Research, the American Psychological Association
Division of Family Psychology, Presidential Citation for Outstanding Lifetime Research Contribution and the National Council of Family Relations, 1994 Burgess Award for Outstanding Career in Theory and Research.
, the Today Show, the CBS Morning News
and Oprah
. He has been profiled in the New York Times, the Ladies Home Journal, Redbook
, Glamour
, Woman’s Day, People
, Self
, the Reader’s Digest, Psychology Today
, the Seattle Times and the Seattle Post-Intelligencer
.
Ph.D.
A Ph.D. is a Doctor of Philosophy, an academic degree.Ph.D. may also refer to:* Ph.D. , a 1980s British group*Piled Higher and Deeper, a web comic strip*PhD: Phantasy Degree, a Korean comic series* PhD Docbook renderer, an XML renderer...
psychologist
Psychologist
Psychologist is a professional or academic title used by individuals who are either:* Clinical professionals who work with patients in a variety of therapeutic contexts .* Scientists conducting psychological research or teaching psychology in a college...
known for his work on marital
Marriage
Marriage is a social union or legal contract between people that creates kinship. It is an institution in which interpersonal relationships, usually intimate and sexual, are acknowledged in a variety of ways, depending on the culture or subculture in which it is found...
stability and relationship analysis through scientific direct observations published in peer-reviewed literature. The lessons derived from this work represent a partial basis for the relationship counseling
Relationship counseling
Relationship counseling is the process of counseling the parties of a relationship in an effort to recognize and to better manage or reconcile troublesome differences and repeating patterns of distress...
movement which aim to improve relationship functioning and the avoidance of those behaviors shown by Gottman and other researchers to harm human relationships. Dr. Gottman is a Professor Emeritus of psychology at the University of Washington
University of Washington
University of Washington is a public research university, founded in 1861 in Seattle, Washington, United States. The UW is the largest university in the Northwest and the oldest public university on the West Coast. The university has three campuses, with its largest campus in the University...
. With his wife Dr. Julie Schwartz, Gottman heads a non-profit research institute (The Relationship Research Institute) and a for-profit therapist training entity (The Gottman Institute).
Predictions of divorce
In a 1998 study, Gottman developed a model to predict which newlywed couples will remain married and which will divorce four to six years later. He claims that his model has 90% accuracy. He also claims 81% percent accuracy for another model about which marriages survived after seven to nine years. His models partly rely on Paul EkmanPaul Ekman
Paul Ekman is a psychologist who has been a pioneer in the study of emotions and their relation to facial expressions. He has been considered one of the 100 most eminent psychologists of the twentieth century...
's method of analyzing human emotion and microexpression
Microexpression
A microexpression is a brief, involuntary facial expression shown on the face of humans according to emotions experienced. They usually occur in high-stakes situations, where people have something to lose or gain. Unlike regular facial expressions, it is difficult to fake microexpressions...
s.
The predictive power of Gottman's models, however, is disputed. Journalist Laurie Abraham writes, "What Gottman did wasn't really a prediction of the future but a formula built after the couples' outcomes were already known. This isn't to say that developing such formulas isn't a valuable—indeed, a critical—first step in being able to make a prediction. The next step, however—one absolutely required by the scientific method—is to apply your equation to a fresh sample to see whether it actually works. That is especially necessary with small data slices (such as 57 couples), because patterns that appear important are more likely to be mere flukes. But Gottman never did that." The Gottman Relationship Institute claims that 6 of 7 of Gottman's studies have been properly predictive, by the standard that the predictors, but not their specific relationship to the outcome, were selected in advance.
However, Gottman's 2002 paper makes no claims to accuracy in terms of binary classification, and is instead a regression analysis
Regression analysis
In statistics, regression analysis includes many techniques for modeling and analyzing several variables, when the focus is on the relationship between a dependent variable and one or more independent variables...
of a two factor model where skin conductance levels and oral history narratives encodings are the only two statistically significant variables. Facial expressions using Ekman's encoding scheme were not statistically significant.
Contempt and marriage
Gottman's theory states that there are four major emotional reactions that are destructive and thus are the 4 predictors to a marriage: criticismCriticism
Criticism is the judgement of the merits and faults of the work or actions of an individual or group by another . To criticize does not necessarily imply to find fault, but the word is often taken to mean the simple expression of an objection against prejudice, or a disapproval.Another meaning of...
, defensiveness, stonewalling, and contempt
Contempt
Contempt is an intensely negative emotion regarding a person or group of people as inferior, base, or worthless—it is similar to scorn. It is also used when people are being sarcastic. Contempt is also defined as the state of being despised or dishonored; disgrace, and an open disrespect or willful...
. Among these four, Gottman considers contempt the most important of them all.
Seven Principles
In his book, The Seven Principles of Making Marriage Work, Gottman discusses behaviors that he has observed in marriages that are successful and those that are detrimental to marriage based on his research conducted at his lab in Seattle, WashingtonSeattle, Washington
Seattle is the county seat of King County, Washington. With 608,660 residents as of the 2010 Census, Seattle is the largest city in the Northwestern United States. The Seattle metropolitan area of about 3.4 million inhabitants is the 15th largest metropolitan area in the country...
. He has outlined seven principles that will reinforce the positive aspects of a relationship and help marriages endure during the rough moments.
- Enhance Your Love Maps. Gottman defines a love map as the place in your brainBrainThe brain is the center of the nervous system in all vertebrate and most invertebrate animals—only a few primitive invertebrates such as sponges, jellyfish, sea squirts and starfishes do not have one. It is located in the head, usually close to primary sensory apparatus such as vision, hearing,...
where you store information pertaining to your partner. This is crucial in really knowing your partner, their dreamDreamDreams are successions of images, ideas, emotions, and sensations that occur involuntarily in the mind during certain stages of sleep. The content and purpose of dreams are not definitively understood, though they have been a topic of scientific speculation, philosophical intrigue and religious...
s, hopes, interests, and maintaining their interest throughout the relationship. - Nurture Your Fondness and Admiration. This means laying down a positive view about your spouse, respecting and appreciating their differences.
- Turn Toward Each Other Instead of Away. Acknowledging your partner's small moments in life and orienting yourself towards them will maintain that necessary connection that is vital for the relationship.
- Let Your Partner Influence You. It is important to maintain your own identity in a relationship, but it is equally important to yield to your partner and give in. If both partners allow one another this influence, then they will learn to respect one another on a deeper level.
- Solve Your Solvable Problems. It is important to compromise on issues that can be resolved, which Gottman believes can be accomplished by these five steps: soften your startup, learn to make and receive repair attempts, soothe yourself and each other, compromise, and be tolerant of each other’s faults.
- Overcome Gridlock. Major issues that cannot be resolved because both partners’ views are so fundamentally different involves understanding of the other person and deep communication. The goal is to at least get to a position that allows the other person to empathize with the partner's view, even if a compromise cannot be reached.
- Create Shared Meaning. Create a shared value system that continually connects the partners through rituals/traditions, shared roles and symbols.
Personal life
John Gottman was born in the Dominican Republic to Orthodox Jewish parents. His father was a rabbi in pre-WWII Vienna. John was educated in a Lubavitch yeshiva elementary school in Brooklyn, and currently identifies with Conservative Judaism.Awards and honors
Gottman has been the recipient of four National Institute of Mental HealthNational Institute of Mental Health
The National Institute of Mental Health is one of 27 institutes and centers that make up the National Institutes of Health...
Research Scientist Awards, the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy
American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy
The American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy is the professional association for the field of marriage and family therapy representing more than 25,000 marriage and family therapists throughout the United States, Canada, and abroad....
Distinguished Research Scientist Award, the American Family Therapy Academy Award for Most Distinguished Contributor to Family Systems Research, the American Psychological Association
American Psychological Association
The American Psychological Association is the largest scientific and professional organization of psychologists in the United States. It is the world's largest association of psychologists with around 154,000 members including scientists, educators, clinicians, consultants and students. The APA...
Division of Family Psychology, Presidential Citation for Outstanding Lifetime Research Contribution and the National Council of Family Relations, 1994 Burgess Award for Outstanding Career in Theory and Research.
Media appearances
Gottman has been seen on, among other television programs, Good Morning AmericaGood Morning America
Good Morning America is an American morning news and talk show that is broadcast on the ABC television network; it debuted on November 3, 1975. The weekday program airs for two hours; a third hour aired between 2007 and 2008 exclusively on ABC News Now...
, the Today Show, the CBS Morning News
CBS Morning News
For CBS's main morning news program, formerly known as CBS Morning News, see The Early Show.CBS Morning News is the half-hour daily television broadcast from CBS News that airs following Up to the Minute and features late-breaking news stories, weather forecasts, and sports scores...
and Oprah
The Oprah Winfrey Show
The Oprah Winfrey Show is an American syndicated talk show hosted and produced by its namesake Oprah Winfrey. It ran nationally for 25 seasons beginning in 1986, before concluding in 2011. It is the highest-rated talk show in American television history....
. He has been profiled in the New York Times, the Ladies Home Journal, Redbook
Redbook
Redbook is an American women's magazine published by the Hearst Corporation. It is one of the "Seven Sisters", a group of women's service magazines.-History:...
, Glamour
Glamour (magazine)
Glamour is a women's magazine published by Condé Nast Publications. Founded in 1939 in the United States, it was originally called Glamour of Hollywood....
, Woman’s Day, People
People (magazine)
In 1998, the magazine introduced a version targeted at teens called Teen People. However, on July 27, 2006, the company announced it would shut down publication of Teen People immediately. The last issue to be released was scheduled for September 2006. Subscribers to this magazine received...
, Self
Self (magazine)
Self magazine is an American magazine for women that specializes in health, fitness, nutrition, beauty and happiness. Published by Condé Nast Publications 12 times a year, it has a circulation of 1,486,992 and a total audience of 5,541,000 readers, according to its corporate media kit. The...
, the Reader’s Digest, Psychology Today
Psychology Today
Psychology Today is a bi-monthly magazine published in the United States. It is a psychology-based magazine about relationships, health, and related topics written for a mass audience of non-psychologists. Psychology Today was founded in 1967 and features articles on such topics as love,...
, the Seattle Times and the Seattle Post-Intelligencer
Seattle Post-Intelligencer
The Seattle Post-Intelligencer is an online newspaper and former print newspaper covering Seattle, Washington, United States, and the surrounding metropolitan area...
.
Works
Gottman has published over 190 papers, and is the author or co-author of 40 books, notably:- Why Marriages Succeed or Fail…and How You Can Make Yours Last (Simon & SchusterSimon & SchusterSimon & Schuster, Inc., a division of CBS Corporation, is a publisher founded in New York City in 1924 by Richard L. Simon and M. Lincoln Schuster. It is one of the four largest English-language publishers, alongside Random House, Penguin and HarperCollins...
, 1994) - Raising An Emotionally Intelligent Child: The Heart of Parenting (Simon and Schuster, 1997) – written with Joan Declaire
- The Marriage Clinic (W.W. Norton, 1999), W W Norton page
- The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work (Crown Publishers, 1999) – a New York Times bestseller
- The Relationship Cure, A 5-Step Guide for Building Better Connections with Family, Friends, and Lovers (Crown Publishers, 2001)
- Ten Lessons to Transform Your Marriage: America's Love Lab Experts Share Their Strategies for Strengthening Your Relationship (Crown Publishers, 2006)
- And Baby Makes Three: The Six-Step Plan for Preserving Marital Intimacy and Rekindling Romance After Baby Arrives (Crown Publishers, 2007)
- "The science of trust" about a new concept of truth in relationships that is a crucial factor
External links
- The Gottman Institute
- The Mathematics of Love - An interview (Edge)
- An Interview with John Gottman (Psychotherapy.net)
- John Gottman: Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child KUOW-FMKUOW-FMKUOW-FM 94.9 is a National Public Radio affiliate radio station in Seattle, Washington. It is a top-ranked radio station in the Seattle/Tacoma media market...
Speaker Forum