Groomsman
Encyclopedia
A groomsman is one of the male attendants to the groom
in a wedding ceremony. The term usher is more common in the UK while the term 'groomsman' is considered somewhat lower-middle- class and used by those who have adopted the term from America. Usually the groom selects his closest friends and relatives to serve as groomsmen, and it is considered an honor to be selected. From his groomsmen, the groom usually chooses one to serve as best man.
For a wedding with many guests, the groom may also ask other male friends and relatives to act as ushers without otherwise participating in the wedding ceremony; their sole task is ushering guests to their seats before the ceremony. Ushers may also be hired for very large weddings.
In a military officer's wedding, the roles of groomsmen are replaced by swordsmen of the sword honor guard
. They are usually picked as close personal friends of the groom who have served with him. Their role includes forming the traditional saber arch
for the married couple and guests to walk through.
Additionally, the groom may request other kinds of assistance, such as planning celebratory events such as a bachelor party, also called Stag Night or Buck's Night
; helping make the wedding pleasant for guests by talking with people who are alone or dancing with unaccompanied guests or bridesmaids, if there is dancing at a wedding reception; or providing practical assistance with gifts, luggage, or unexpected complications. Groomsmen may also participate in local or regional traditions, such as decorating the newlywed couple's car.
Bridegroom-men had formerly important duties. The men were called bride-knights, and represented a survival of the primitive days of marriage by capture, when a man called his friends in to assist to "lift" or kidnap the bride
, or from the need to defend the bride from would-be kidnappers.
. A gender-neutral term is honor attendant.
While the best man's required duties are only those of a friend, in the context of a western white wedding
, the best man will typically:
.
Common slang names for this event are bachelor party, stag do or bucks' night in different parts of the world. In many areas, this dinner is now most commonly organized by the best man, and the costs can be shared by all of the participants, or all of the participants except the groom, who becomes the guest of honor.
Groom
Groom may refer to:* Bridegroom, also shortened to "groom", a male wedding partner-Occupations:* Groom , a person responsible for the feeding and care of horses* Certain distinguished roles in the English Royal Household:...
in a wedding ceremony. The term usher is more common in the UK while the term 'groomsman' is considered somewhat lower-middle- class and used by those who have adopted the term from America. Usually the groom selects his closest friends and relatives to serve as groomsmen, and it is considered an honor to be selected. From his groomsmen, the groom usually chooses one to serve as best man.
For a wedding with many guests, the groom may also ask other male friends and relatives to act as ushers without otherwise participating in the wedding ceremony; their sole task is ushering guests to their seats before the ceremony. Ushers may also be hired for very large weddings.
In a military officer's wedding, the roles of groomsmen are replaced by swordsmen of the sword honor guard
Honor guard
An honor guard, or ceremonial guard, is a ceremonial unit, usually military in nature and composed of volunteers who are carefully screened for their physical ability and dexterity...
. They are usually picked as close personal friends of the groom who have served with him. Their role includes forming the traditional saber arch
Saber Arch
A Saber Arch is a wedding tradition in which sabers or swords are used to salute a newly married couple. The bride and groom pass under an honorary arch of sabers, typically when exiting the building in which the wedding ceremony took place...
for the married couple and guests to walk through.
Duties
The most visible duty of the groomsmen is helping guests find their places before the ceremony and to stand near the groom during the wedding ceremony.Additionally, the groom may request other kinds of assistance, such as planning celebratory events such as a bachelor party, also called Stag Night or Buck's Night
Bachelor party
A bachelor party , also known as a stag party, stag night or stag do , a bull's party , or a buck's party or buck's night , is a party held for a man shortly before he enters marriage, to celebrate his "last night of freedom" or merely to spend...
; helping make the wedding pleasant for guests by talking with people who are alone or dancing with unaccompanied guests or bridesmaids, if there is dancing at a wedding reception; or providing practical assistance with gifts, luggage, or unexpected complications. Groomsmen may also participate in local or regional traditions, such as decorating the newlywed couple's car.
Bridegroom-men had formerly important duties. The men were called bride-knights, and represented a survival of the primitive days of marriage by capture, when a man called his friends in to assist to "lift" or kidnap the bride
Bride kidnapping
Bride kidnapping, also known as marriage by abduction or marriage by capture, is a practice throughout history and around the world in which a man abducts the woman he wishes to marry...
, or from the need to defend the bride from would-be kidnappers.
Best man
The best man is the chief male assistant to the groom at a wedding. In most modern, English-speaking countries, the groom extends this honor to someone who is close to him, generally either a brother or his closest male friend. When the groom wishes to give this honor to a woman, she may be termed the best woman or best person, or may still be referred to as the 'best man'. The bride's equivalent of the best man is the bridesmaid, or the maid/matron of honourBridesmaid
The bridesmaids are members of the bride's wedding party in a wedding. A bridesmaid is typically a young woman, and often a close friend or sister. She attends to the bride on the day of a wedding or marriage ceremony...
. A gender-neutral term is honor attendant.
While the best man's required duties are only those of a friend, in the context of a western white wedding
White wedding
A white wedding is a traditional formal or semi-formal wedding originating in Europe.The term originates from the white color of the wedding dress, which first became popular with Victorian era elites, after Queen Victoria wore a white lace dress at her wedding; however, the term now also...
, the best man will typically:
- assist the groom on the wedding day,
- keep the wedding rings safe until needed during the ceremony,
- act as a legal witness to the marriage, and
- make a toastToast (honor)A toast is a ritual in which a drink is taken as an expression of honor or goodwill. The term may be applied to the person or thing so honored, the drink taken, or the verbal expression accompanying the drink. Thus, a person could be "the toast of the evening," for whom someone "proposes a toast"...
to the bride and groom at the reception. Formerly, the best man would read out the telegrams of those who couldn't attend.
In various cultures
The best man, or honor attendants in general, are not universal customs. Even in places where a best man is customary, the role may be quite different when compared to other areas or times.- In UgandaUgandaUganda , officially the Republic of Uganda, is a landlocked country in East Africa. Uganda is also known as the "Pearl of Africa". It is bordered on the east by Kenya, on the north by South Sudan, on the west by the Democratic Republic of the Congo, on the southwest by Rwanda, and on the south by...
a best man is expected to guide the newlyweds in the ways of marriage. This means that ideally a best man must be married, preferably to one wife, and should be in position to give sound, tried and tested advice. A best man must be a confidantConfidantThe confidant is a character in a story that the lead character confides in and trusts. Typically, these consist of the best friend, relative, doctor or boss.- Role :...
and be discreet about the details he shares with the new couple. - In BhutanBhutanBhutan , officially the Kingdom of Bhutan, is a landlocked state in South Asia, located at the eastern end of the Himalayas and bordered to the south, east and west by the Republic of India and to the north by the People's Republic of China...
the best man presents himself at the wedding as a ceremonial guardian to both bride and groom. Thereafter he entertains the guests, sometimes for several hours. - In Eastern Orthodox weddings in GreeceGreeceGreece , officially the Hellenic Republic , and historically Hellas or the Republic of Greece in English, is a country in southeastern Europe....
, the best man is often also the koumbaros, or religious sponsor, and is traditionally the groom's godfather. The koumbaros (or koumbara, if a woman) is an honored participant who crowns the couple and participates in circling the altar three times. In some areas, this person also pays for all the wedding expenses. - In UkraineUkraineUkraine is a country in Eastern Europe. It has an area of 603,628 km², making it the second largest contiguous country on the European continent, after Russia...
a best man is responsible for guarding the bride during the wedding festivities. When he or the groom steps away, the bride gets "kidnapped" or has a shoe stolen. Then the groom or the best man must pay a ransomRansomRansom is the practice of holding a prisoner or item to extort money or property to secure their release, or it can refer to the sum of money involved.In an early German law, a similar concept was called bad influence...
in exchange for returning the bride, usually by paying money (which is given to the bride) or by doing something embarrassing. - In IndiaIndiaIndia , officially the Republic of India , is a country in South Asia. It is the seventh-largest country by geographical area, the second-most populous country with over 1.2 billion people, and the most populous democracy in the world...
, there are different customs in different states. In Hindu marriages of north India, the best man is always with the groom one or two days prior to the wedding. He cares for the groom's wedding attire and items and sees that the groom is not stressed. The counterparts from the bride's side always try to tease or try to come to terms with the groom's best man. The groom's pair of shoes is something which the bride's side eyes on the wedding day. Usually the shoes are stolen during the wedding lunch or some religious ceremony and hidden at a secured location completely under control of the bride's team. The groom's best man and his team are responsible for searching and stealing them back unbeknownst to the bride. If they fail, a small cash ransom is negotiated between the groom and his best man and the bride's counterparts. The shoes are then returned to the groom.. - In PolandPolandPoland , officially the Republic of Poland , is a country in Central Europe bordered by Germany to the west; the Czech Republic and Slovakia to the south; Ukraine, Belarus and Lithuania to the east; and the Baltic Sea and Kaliningrad Oblast, a Russian exclave, to the north...
, the best man is literally called a "witness" and, along with the maid of honour, signs the book of marriages in a church. The best man is not necessarily expected to be the main organizer of anything specific but rathers serves as a wingman to the groom helping out where needed. Traditionally there is only one groomsman along with only one bridesmaid and they sit directly behind the soon to be married couple during the church ceremony.
Bachelor party
In the past, the bachelor party was typically scheduled for a convenient evening during the week before the wedding. A type of farewell dinner, it was always hosted, and therefore organized and paid for, entirely by the groom. The dinner was seen as the groom's last chance to entertain his friends as a single man; after the wedding, dinner parties at his home would always be presided over by his wife in her role as hostessHostess
Hostess is a brand of Hostess Brands in the United States, known for its line of snack foods, such as Twinkies, CupCakes, Chocodiles, Ding Dongs, Ho Hos, Suzy Q's, Sno Balls, Zingers, Donettes, Mini Muffins, Hostess Fruit Pies, Pudding Pies, and Doughnuts....
.
Common slang names for this event are bachelor party, stag do or bucks' night in different parts of the world. In many areas, this dinner is now most commonly organized by the best man, and the costs can be shared by all of the participants, or all of the participants except the groom, who becomes the guest of honor.