Reflective Parenting
Encyclopedia
Reflective Parenting is a theory of parenting
Parenting
Parenting is the process of promoting and supporting the physical, emotional, social, and intellectual development of a child from infancy to adulthood...

 developed from the work of psychoanalyst
Psychoanalysis
Psychoanalysis is a psychological theory developed in the late 19th and early 20th centuries by Austrian neurologist Sigmund Freud. Psychoanalysis has expanded, been criticized and developed in different directions, mostly by some of Freud's former students, such as Alfred Adler and Carl Gustav...

 Peter Fonagy
Peter Fonagy
Peter Fonagy, born in 1952, at Budapest, Hungary, currently residing in London with his family; he has two children, Carolina and Francisco. Fonagy is a prominent contemporary psychoanalyst and clinical psychologist. He studied clinical psychology at University College London...

 and his colleagues at the Tavistock Clinic
Tavistock Clinic
The in London was founded in 1920 by Dr. Hugh Crichton-Miller, a psychiatrist who developed psychological treatments for shell-shocked soldiers during and after the First World War. The clinic's first patient was, however, a child. Its clinical services were always, therefore, for both children...

 in London. Fonagy introduced the concept of “reflective functioning”, which is defined as the ability to imagine mental states in self and others. Through this capacity for reflection, we develop the ability to understand our own behavioral responses and the responses of others as a meaningful attempt to communicate those inner mental states. As Fonagy describes it, “reflective function is the… uniquely human capacity to make sense of each other”.

Numerous researchers have studied how reflective functioning works in the parent-child relationship. They have learned that a mother with high reflective functioning has the ability to see her child as a separate, autonomous individual with “a mind of his own.” As a result, she attributes thoughts, feelings, intentionality and desires to her child, and can recognize her own thoughts, feelings, intentions and desires. This research has demonstrated that when a parent has this capacity, it 1) strengthens the parent-child relationship, 2) teaches the child how to understand and regulate his behavior, and 3) supports cognitive development
Theory of cognitive development
Piaget's theory of cognitive development is a comprehensive theory about the nature and development of human intelligence first developed by Jean Piaget. It is primarily known as a developmental stage theory, but in fact, it deals with the nature of knowledge itself and how humans come gradually to...

.

Arietta Slade and her colleagues at Yale Child Study Center
Yale Child Study Center
The Yale Child Study Center is a department at the Yale University School of Medicine. The center conducts research and provides clinical services and medical training related to children and families...

, John Grienenberger and his team at the Wright Institute in Los Angeles, and Alicia Lieberman and Patricia Van Horn at UC San Francisco
University of California, San Francisco
The University of California, San Francisco is one of the world's leading centers of health sciences research, patient care, and education. UCSF's medical, pharmacy, dentistry, nursing, and graduate schools are among the top health science professional schools in the world...

are some of the first researchers and clinicians in the United States to use this research to develop reflective parenting programs and interventions. These programs share a common focus; to develop and enhance parents’ capacity for reflective thinking. They teach parents to understand and respond to a child’s motivations instead of her actions, in the belief that reflection is more productive for healthy family relationships than addressing specific actions.

Cara Luneau [Boulder Institute for Psychotherapy and Research; also Naropa University] developed a reflective parenting program in 2007, also based on Fonagy's work. This program promotes an understanding that the practice of mindfulness meditation provides opportunity for the development and enhancement of reflective functioning as well as for improved self-regulation. The program emphasizes mindfulness practices while teaching parents to self-regulate and to think reflectively about themselves and their children.
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