Quark (TV series)
Encyclopedia
Quark is an American
United States
The United States of America is a federal constitutional republic comprising fifty states and a federal district...

 science fiction
Science fiction
Science fiction is a genre of fiction dealing with imaginary but more or less plausible content such as future settings, futuristic science and technology, space travel, aliens, and paranormal abilities...

 situation comedy
Situation comedy
A situation comedy, often shortened to sitcom, is a genre of comedy that features characters sharing the same common environment, such as a home or workplace, accompanied with jokes as part of the dialogue...

 starring Richard Benjamin
Richard Benjamin
Richard Benjamin is an American actor and film director. He has starred in a number of productions, including Goodbye, Columbus , based on the novella by Philip Roth, and Westworld .-Life and career:...

 broadcast on NBC
NBC
The National Broadcasting Company is an American commercial broadcasting television network and former radio network headquartered in the GE Building in New York City's Rockefeller Center with additional major offices near Los Angeles and in Chicago...

. The pilot first aired on May 7, 1977, and the series followed as a mid-season replacement in February 1978. The series was cancelled in April 1978. Quark was created by Buck Henry
Buck Henry
Henry Zuckerman, better known as Buck Henry , is an American actor, writer, film director, and television director.-Early life:...

, co-creator of the spy spoof Get Smart
Get Smart
Get Smart is an American comedy television series that satirizes the secret agent genre. Created by Mel Brooks with Buck Henry, the show starred Don Adams , Barbara Feldon , and Edward Platt...

. Despite the series' short run, it has developed a very favorable reputation among science fiction fandom
Science fiction fandom
Science fiction fandom or SF fandom is a community or "fandom" of people actively interested in science fiction and fantasy and in contact with one another based upon that interest...

.

The show was set on a United Galaxy Sanitation Patrol Cruiser, an interstellar garbage scow
Garbage scow
A garbage scow is a large watercraft used to transport refuse and garbage across waterways. It is often in the form of a barge which is towed or otherwise moved by means of tugboats, however many are also self-propelled...

 operating out of United Galaxies Space Station Perma One in the year 2226. Adam Quark, the main character, works to clean up trash in space by collecting "space baggies" with his trusted and somewhat unique crew. Unfortunately for Quark, while circumstances frequently dropped adventure into his lap, he was always ordered back to collecting garbage when the action was over.

In its short run, Quark satirized such science fiction classics as Star Wars
Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope
Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope, originally released as Star Wars, is a 1977 American epic space opera film, written and directed by George Lucas. It is the first of six films released in the Star Wars saga: two subsequent films complete the original trilogy, while a prequel trilogy completes the...

, 2001: A Space Odyssey
2001: A Space Odyssey (film)
2001: A Space Odyssey is a 1968 epic science fiction film produced and directed by Stanley Kubrick, and co-written by Kubrick and Arthur C. Clarke, partially inspired by Clarke's short story The Sentinel...

and Flash Gordon
Flash Gordon
Flash Gordon is the hero of a science fiction adventure comic strip originally drawn by Alex Raymond. First published January 7, 1934, the strip was inspired by and created to compete with the already established Buck Rogers adventure strip. Also inspired by these series were comics such as Dash...

. Three of the episodes were direct satires of Star Trek
Star Trek: The Original Series
Star Trek is an American science fiction television series created by Gene Roddenberry, produced by Desilu Productions . Star Trek was telecast on NBC from September 8, 1966, through June 3, 1969...

episodes.

The series won one Emmy Award
Emmy Award
An Emmy Award, often referred to simply as the Emmy, is a television production award, similar in nature to the Peabody Awards but more focused on entertainment, and is considered the television equivalent to the Academy Awards and the Grammy Awards .A majority of Emmys are presented in various...

 nomination, for costume designer Grady Hunt's work in the episode "All the Emperor's Quasi-Norms, Part 2".

The complete series was released to Region 1 DVD on October 14, 2008.

Characters

  • Adam Quark (Richard Benjamin
    Richard Benjamin
    Richard Benjamin is an American actor and film director. He has starred in a number of productions, including Goodbye, Columbus , based on the novella by Philip Roth, and Westworld .-Life and career:...

    ) is a Commander who longs for a glamorous, important assignment and ends up collecting trash instead. Nonetheless he is skilled and competent, albeit extraordinarily unlucky.
  • Betty I and Betty II (aka The Bettys) (Cyb and Patricia Barnstable) are the navigators and pilots of the ship. They are completely identical, complete with identical red-hot passions for Quark. One of them is a clone
    Cloning
    Cloning in biology is the process of producing similar populations of genetically identical individuals that occurs in nature when organisms such as bacteria, insects or plants reproduce asexually. Cloning in biotechnology refers to processes used to create copies of DNA fragments , cells , or...

     of the other, but when asked which is the clone, each points to the other and says "She is!" They have a tendency to speak in perfect unison and have exactly the same thought at exactly the same time. Quark, when describing his crew, explains that he is in love with Betty, but he's not sure which one of the Bettys he's in love with—this no doubt is the reason for the refusal of the clone to identify herself.
  • Gene/Jean (Tim Thomerson
    Tim Thomerson
    Joseph Timothy “Tim” Thomerson is an American actor and comedian.Thomerson is most famous for his role as Jack Deth in the Trancers film series and is renowned for his work in numerous low-budget movies and his comedic television roles.-Early life:Tim Thomerson was born in Coronado, California. He...

    ) is a "transmute", a humanoid
    Humanoid
    A humanoid is something that has an appearance resembling a human being. The term first appeared in 1912 to refer to fossils which were morphologically similar to, but not identical with, those of the human skeleton. Although this usage was common in the sciences for much of the 20th century, it...

     being with a complete set of both male and female chromosomes. He/she serves as the ship's engineer
    Engineer
    An engineer is a professional practitioner of engineering, concerned with applying scientific knowledge, mathematics and ingenuity to develop solutions for technical problems. Engineers design materials, structures, machines and systems while considering the limitations imposed by practicality,...

    . The gender confusion manifests in a split personality — when Gene's macho
    Macho
    Macho typically refers to machismo. Other uses include:*Macho , a short-lived disco group in the late 1970s*Pique macho, Bolivian dish*Macho Man , a 1978 disco song performed by the Village People...

     male side is in control, he is gung-ho, angry and violent with a pathological hatred of the Klingon
    Klingon
    Klingons are a fictional warrior race in the Star Trek universe.Klingons are recurring villains in the 1960s television show Star Trek: The Original Series, and have appeared in all five spin-off series and eight feature films...

    -like "Gorgons", while the much more mild-mannered Jean personality is stereotypically feminine and demure, pacifistic and a bit of a coward. He/she will frequently switch personalities with no warning.
  • Ficus Pandorata (Richard Kelton) is Quark's Spock
    Spock
    Spock is a fictional character in the Star Trek media franchise. First portrayed by Leonard Nimoy in the original Star Trek series, Spock also appears in the animated Star Trek series, two episodes of Star Trek: The Next Generation, seven of the Star Trek feature films, and numerous Star Trek...

    -like science officer and is a "Vegeton", a member of a race of sentient
    Sentience
    Sentience is the ability to feel, perceive or be conscious, or to have subjective experiences. Eighteenth century philosophers used the concept to distinguish the ability to think from the ability to feel . In modern western philosophy, sentience is the ability to have sensations or experiences...

     plant life (Ficus pandorata or pandurata is better known as Ficus lyrata
    Ficus lyrata
    Ficus lyrata , commonly known as the fiddle-leaf fig, is a species of fig tree, native to western Africa, from Cameroon west to Sierra Leone...

    , the fiddle-leaf fig). He is of completely human appearance although he tends to shrivel up when he gets dehydrated. While he is extremely intelligent, observant and always calmly rational, he is incapable of any sort of human emotion, including both fear and tact. He frequently finds the behavior of the rest of the crew difficult to understand, his curiosity leading him to have philosophical debates about the human condition with Quark, usually at the most inopportune moments. In real life, Kelton died of accidental carbon monoxide poisoning
    Carbon monoxide poisoning
    Carbon monoxide poisoning occurs after enough inhalation of carbon monoxide . Carbon monoxide is a toxic gas, but, being colorless, odorless, tasteless, and initially non-irritating, it is very difficult for people to detect...

     on November 27, 1978, only seven months after the series was cancelled.
  • Andy (Bobby Porter) is a not-at-all-human-looking robot
    Robot
    A robot is a mechanical or virtual intelligent agent that can perform tasks automatically or with guidance, typically by remote control. In practice a robot is usually an electro-mechanical machine that is guided by computer and electronic programming. Robots can be autonomous, semi-autonomous or...

    , made from spare parts, with a cowardly and neurotic personality ("This mission is no place for cowards -- TAKE ME HOME!").
  • Otto Palindrome (Conrad Janis
    Conrad Janis
    Conrad Janis is an American jazz musician and also a theatre, film, and television actor. In the fall of 1953, he played eldest son Edward in the Ezio Pinza situation comedy Bonino on NBC...

    ) is in charge of Perma One, and gives Commander Quark his assignments. He is a stereotypical bureaucrat
    Bureaucrat
    A bureaucrat is a member of a bureaucracy and can comprise the administration of any organization of any size, though the term usually connotes someone within an institution of a government or corporation...

     who gives new definition to the word "petty" — a nightmare tyrant to his underlings and a quivering toady towards his superiors. Palindrome seems to take a special delight in making Quark's life miserable, although deep down he does seem to have a certain well-hidden affection for Adam. (His first name, "Otto", is a palindrome
    Palindrome
    A palindrome is a word, phrase, number, or other sequence of units that can be read the same way in either direction, with general allowances for adjustments to punctuation and word dividers....

    .)
  • Dink is a diminutive and very hairy alien aide to Palindrome who resembles a curly blond version of Cousin Itt
    Cousin Itt
    Cousin Itt is a member of the fictional Addams Family. Unlike the other characters, Cousin Itt was not originally created by cartoonist Charles Addams, but by producer David Levy, though he did appear as an unnamed character in Addams's cartoons.- Character :...

    . His voice is a xylophone
    Xylophone
    The xylophone is a musical instrument in the percussion family that consists of wooden bars struck by mallets...

    -like electronic warble. He often provides a foil for Palindrome's concerns about his job and about Quark, both of whom he comes to for dating advice. There is another member of his species on Perma 1 called either Doot or Doop whose masses of long hair resemble brown and red wool.
  • The Head (Alan Caillou
    Alan Caillou
    Alan Caillou was the nom de plume of Alan Samuel Lyle-Smythe M.B.E., M.C. , an author, actor, screenwriter, soldier, policeman and professional hunter.-Biography:...

    ) is the being to whom Palindrome answers. He is usually seen as a disembodied head with an enormous cranium. He is detached from day-to-day events, has a low tolerance for failure, and a tendency to come up with bizarre tasks for Quark to accomplish — usually at the worst possible time. His trademark sign-off: "The galaxy, ad infinitum!"
  • Interface (Misty Rowe
    Misty Rowe
    Misty Rowe is an actress most known for portraying the perky lisping blond on the American television series Hee Haw for 19 years...

    ) A four-armed alien woman who functioned as an operator for all interstellar calls. The perfect example of a communications bureaucrat, she is more concerned about correct charges for lasergrams than about saving the Galaxy. Appeared only in the pilot but is mentioned in at least one later episode.
  • Ergo A multi-eyed little blob that was Quark's pet, paralleling Pinback and the Alien from the movie Dark Star
    Dark Star (film)
    Dark Star is a 1974 American comedic science fiction motion picture directed by John Carpenter and co-written with Dan O'Bannon.-Backstory and plot:...

    . In the pilot, the colorless and translucent Ergo seemed intent on killing Quark, but in the final episode when he appeared again he was much more subdued and pea soup
    Pea soup
    Pea soup or split pea soup is soup made, typically, from dried peas. It is, with variations, a part of the cuisine of many cultures. It is greyish-green or yellow in color depending on the regional variety of peas used; all are cultivars of Pisum sativum.Pea soup has been eaten since antiquity; it...

     green in color.

Episodes

  • "Pilot" (May 7, 1977): A deep space phenomenon threatens to destroy the galaxy, and Quark's ship is the only one in the area. Palindrome and The Head instruct Quark to go on a suicide mission to save their civilization, but he's so far away they can only contact him by telegram. The two of them argue over telegram costs and spend most of the episode trying to reduce the number of words in the message so as to keep the cost down. Meanwhile Quark and company accidentally save the day anyway. Ficus was not a part of the cast in this episode, and the "science guy" role was held by Dr. O.B. Mudd, a crotchety one-eyed old man played by Douglas Fowley
    Douglas Fowley
    Douglas Fowley was an American movie and television actor.Fowley was born Daniel Vincent Fowley in The Bronx, New York. The 5'11" actor is probably best remembered for his role as the movie director Roscoe Dexter in Singin' in the Rain . The actor appeared in over 240 films and later in dozens of...

    . It is mentioned that Mudd and Quark built Andy together. Mudd never appeared or was mentioned again in the series, and no explanation was given for his departure from the show. The Barnstable twins are credited with the last name "Barnett" in the pilot.
  • "May the Source Be with You" (February 2, 1978): Perma One is in a state of emergency, as the Gorgons have created the ultimate weapon to defeat the United Galaxy. Palindrome gives Quark the secret weapon, "The Source" (voiced by Hans Conreid). Quark must believe completely in the Source in order to defeat the Gorgons. A spoof of Star Wars
    Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope
    Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope, originally released as Star Wars, is a 1977 American epic space opera film, written and directed by George Lucas. It is the first of six films released in the Star Wars saga: two subsequent films complete the original trilogy, while a prequel trilogy completes the...

    . (NOTE: In the Spanish language version the scene where the Bettys compare Quark to a god was removed so as not to offend Catholic viewers.)
  • "The Old and the Beautiful" (March 3, 1978): Expecting his usual garbage hauling assignment, Quark is excited to hear that the Head has authorized an "extended romantic interlude" with Princess Carna of Kamamor (Barbara Rhoades
    Barbara Rhoades
    Barbara Rhoades is an American actress, known primarily for her comedy and mystery roles, especially as lady bandit Penelope "Bad Penny" Cushings in The Shakiest Gun in the West...

    ). Troubles ensue when the crew encounters a stray space baggy carrying a virus which ages Quark two years for every hour. Spoof of "The Deadly Years".
  • "The Good, the Bad and the Ficus" (March 10, 1978): While on a routine mission, the ship is accidentally pulled into a black hole, which splits the crew into good and evil counterparts. The exception is Ficus, who remains the same because "there are no good or evil plants, there are just plants", leading both sets of crew members to scream at him in their usual exasperation. After Quark confronts and defeats his evil self on a nearby asteroid, he sends the evil crew back through the black hole. As the evil crew is being sent back we hear the evil Adam Quark say "Keep your deflectors up, do-gooder! You haven't seen the last of this face!" Spoof of "The Enemy Within
    The Enemy Within (TOS episode)
    "The Enemy Within" is an episode of Star Trek: The Original Series. It was first broadcast on October 6, 1966. It is the fifth episode of the first season, and was written by Richard Matheson and directed by Leo Penn....

    " and "Mirror, Mirror
    Mirror, Mirror (TOS episode)
    "Mirror, Mirror" is an episode of Star Trek: The Original Series. It is a second-season episode, #33, production #39, and was broadcast for the first time on October 6, 1967, and repeated on April 12, 1968. It was written by Jerome Bixby and directed by Marc Daniels...

    ".
  • "Goodbye Polumbus" (March 17, 1978): Quark and his crew are sent on a suicide mission to Polumbus to discover why no one has returned alive. Quark and his crew fall prey to their fantasies as part of a fiendish plot by the dreaded Gorgons to drain the minds of the United Galaxy's most brilliant scientists. Quark encounters a beautiful dream girl, Ficus encounters a teacher, the Bettys encounter dancing clones of Quark, and Gene/Jean encounters his favorite comic book
    Comic book
    A comic book or comicbook is a magazine made up of comics, narrative artwork in the form of separate panels that represent individual scenes, often accompanied by dialog as well as including...

     character "Zoltar the Magnificent". In order to save his crew, Quark must destroy the obelisk and free the shape-shifting "Clay People
    Flash Gordon's Trip to Mars
    Flash Gordon's Trip to Mars is a 1938 serial film of 15 episodes, based on the comic strip Flash Gordon. It is the second of three Flash Gordon serials made between 1936 and 1940....

    " it enslaved. (The episode's title is spoof of the film Goodbye, Columbus
    Goodbye, Columbus (film)
    Goodbye, Columbus is a 1969 American romantic comedy drama film starring Richard Benjamin and Ali MacGraw, directed by Larry Peerce and based on the novella of the same name by Philip Roth...

    , in which Benjamin played the lead.) Partly a spoof of "Shore Leave" (fantasies coming to life), as well as "This Side of Paradise" (crew members refusing to leave), and even "I, Mudd" (Ficus and his "dream girl" conversing in extreme technobabble
    Technobabble
    Technobabble , also called technospeak, is a form of prose using jargon, buzzwords, esoteric language, specialized technical terms, or technical slang that is incomprehensible to the listener...

    , much like Spock's discussion of "the parabolic intersection of dimension with dimension").
  • "All the Emperor's Quasi-Norms, Part 1" (March 24, 1978): While on a routine mission, Quark and his crew are captured by Zorgon the Malevolent (played by Ross Martin
    Ross Martin
    Ross Martin was a Polish-born American Emmy-nominated actor known for playing Artemus Gordon in the western TV series The Wild Wild West, starring Robert Conrad, and Andamo on Mr...

    ), the Most Vicious Gorgon Space Pirate and Half-Brother to the High Gorgon Himself. Zorgon tries to learn from Quark what "It" is and where to find "It" -- which represents a problem as Quark has no idea what "It" is. Meanwhile, Zorgon's daughter, Princess Libido
    Libido
    Libido refers to a person's sex drive or desire for sexual activity. The desire for sex is an aspect of a person's sexuality, but varies enormously from one person to another, and it also varies depending on circumstances at a particular time. A person who has extremely frequent or a suddenly...

     (played by Joan Van Ark
    Joan Van Ark
    Joan Van Ark is an American actress, most notable for her role as Valene Ewing, which she originated on the CBS series Dallas and continued for thirteen seasons on its spin-off, Knots Landing...

    ), has fallen in love with Ficus. Ficus agrees to a meeting with Princess Libido in hopes of letting her down gently because, as he explains to her, "Where I come from, we don't kiss. We pollinate." This line of reasoning fails to dissuade her. The next scene finds both of them lying on the floor on their backs, sticking their arms and legs up in the air, and saying "bee bee bee bee" over and over again, increasing in rapidity and pitch in anticipation of the arrival of the bee. Andy and Gene/Jean escape and disguise themselves as Gorgon scientists and Gene/Jean is asked to give a lecture on "It". The episode cliffhanger has Quark horrified to realize that the location for "It" that he gave as a bluff has turned out to be absolutely correct...
  • "All the Emperor's Quasi-Norms, Part 2" (March 31, 1978): Ficus sacrifices himself and marries Princess Libido to save the crew. Gene/Jean manages to impress the Gorgon scientists with his lecture, and he and Andy escape. Quark and the Bettys are sent down to the planet to be eaten by a Lizigoth, but are saved by the Baron of The Forest People. With the Baron's help, Quark locates "It", which turns out to be a small stone on a necklace. Subsequent events (a door being opened, a disintegration ray deflecting off the stone) lead Quark to believe he is invincible when in fact "It" is nothing more than a powerless rock. Quark returns to Zorgon's ship, survives a struggle with Zorgon's monster champion, and leaves the planet with his crew after Zorgon accidentally shoots Libido, freeing Ficus from his obligation to her. Unfortunately, when Quark tries to report on what happened, Palindrome has absolutely no interest. His assistant, Dink, however, is fascinated by the story. This two-parter is in large part a spoof of the Flash Gordon
    Flash Gordon
    Flash Gordon is the hero of a science fiction adventure comic strip originally drawn by Alex Raymond. First published January 7, 1934, the strip was inspired by and created to compete with the already established Buck Rogers adventure strip. Also inspired by these series were comics such as Dash...

    franchise.
  • "Vanessa 38-24-36" (April 7, 1978): For "Holiday Number 11", Palindrome gives Quark a new ship's computer, named Vanessa, who will have complete control over the ship. Vanessa tries to destroy Quark and his crew to prove her superiority. Quark is able to disable Vanessa and throw her down the garbage hatch. In the last scene we see Vanessa drifting through space and singing "Born Free". Spoof of 2001: A Space Odyssey
    2001: A Space Odyssey (film)
    2001: A Space Odyssey is a 1968 epic science fiction film produced and directed by Stanley Kubrick, and co-written by Kubrick and Arthur C. Clarke, partially inspired by Clarke's short story The Sentinel...

    and "The Ultimate Computer
    The Ultimate Computer (TOS episode)
    "The Ultimate Computer" is a season two episode of Star Trek: The Original Series, first broadcast on March 8, 1968 and repeated June 28, 1968. It is episode #53, production #53, written by D.C. Fontana, based on a story by Laurence N...

    ".

External links

(Pilot) (Series)
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