Sexual anorexia
Encyclopedia
Sexual anorexia is a term used to describe a loss of "appetite" for romantic-sexual interaction. However, the term is used broadly and can be better defined as a fear of intimacy to the point that the person has severe anxiety surrounding sex with emotional content i.e. in an intimate relationship. Other practitioners have applied the term in their own way. In the view of some practitioners, corroborating the seminal work of Patrick Carnes, there are people who appear to have a sexual addiction
which is expressed through a variety of behaviors such as the compulsive use of strip club
s, prostitutes, cyberporn sites, etc. but more accurately fit the definition of sexual anorexic in that they seem to lack the ability to have a relationship
of a sexual nature beyond a paid-for or anonymous experience. The person does not have an aversion to sex but to intimacy. A sex addict is more likely to be capable of being in a more intimate relationship and is often married or in a committed relationship when deciding to get treatment for his or her addiction. A sexual anorexic may have a social phobia
or be so fragile emotionally that the risk of rejection or criticism is far more frightening than being isolated. Narcissistic traits are often seen in both sexual anorexics and sex addicts, but in the sexual anorexic, the traits are considered far more "brittle" and the pain of rejection and criticism is far more excruciating than for the sex addict.
Treatment is aimed at helping the person see where their fears really are and to see the world in less black and white terms. The patient is encouraged to take calculated risks with social activities and distorted thinking is gently challenged with facts and reality. The goals for both sex addicts and sexual anorexics is to learn to have healthy sex and get emotional needs met in direct ways, and to set healthy boundaries. This is an issue that requires ongoing treatment in planned stages with the end goal of autonomy, independence, and improved social relationships.
The concept of "sexual anorexia" was first mentioned by psychologist Nathan Hare in 1975, in an unpublished dissertation submitted in partial fulfillment for a Ph.D. at the California School of Professional Psychology in San Francisco. Ellen Goodman, the nationally syndicated columnist, revealed psychiatrist Sylvia Kaplan's usage of the concept in 1981; which was quickly noted in the editor's "Notes" in the journal "Black Male/Female Relationships." A book by psychologist Patrick Carnes called "Sexual Anorexia" was published in 1997. Hare's Ph.D. dissertation on "Black Male-Female Relations" (1975) as well as the now defunct journal called "Black Male/Female Relationships" (1979-1982) are available in University Microfilms, from the University of Michigan. See also Nathan and Julia Hare, "Sexual Anorexia," Crisis in Black Sexual Politics, published in 1989 by The Black Think Tank, San Francisco,pp. 137-140, ISBN 0-9613086-2. Julia Hare has also used it in a book, "The Sexual and Political Anorexia of the Black Woman" (June, 2008, ISBN 0-981-7999-09).
Sexual addiction
Sexual addiction is a popular model to explain hypersexuality—sexual urges, behaviors, or thoughts that appear extreme in frequency or feel out of one's control...
which is expressed through a variety of behaviors such as the compulsive use of strip club
Strip club
A strip club is an adult entertainment venue in which striptease or other erotic or exotic dance is regularly performed. Strip clubs typically adopt a nightclub or bar style, but can also adopt a theatre or cabaret-style....
s, prostitutes, cyberporn sites, etc. but more accurately fit the definition of sexual anorexic in that they seem to lack the ability to have a relationship
Intimate relationship
An intimate relationship is a particularly close interpersonal relationship that involves physical or emotional intimacy. Physical intimacy is characterized by romantic or passionate love and attachment, or sexual activity. The term is also sometimes used euphemistically for a sexual...
of a sexual nature beyond a paid-for or anonymous experience. The person does not have an aversion to sex but to intimacy. A sex addict is more likely to be capable of being in a more intimate relationship and is often married or in a committed relationship when deciding to get treatment for his or her addiction. A sexual anorexic may have a social phobia
Phobia
A phobia is a type of anxiety disorder, usually defined as a persistent fear of an object or situation in which the sufferer commits to great lengths in avoiding, typically disproportional to the actual danger posed, often being recognized as irrational...
or be so fragile emotionally that the risk of rejection or criticism is far more frightening than being isolated. Narcissistic traits are often seen in both sexual anorexics and sex addicts, but in the sexual anorexic, the traits are considered far more "brittle" and the pain of rejection and criticism is far more excruciating than for the sex addict.
Treatment is aimed at helping the person see where their fears really are and to see the world in less black and white terms. The patient is encouraged to take calculated risks with social activities and distorted thinking is gently challenged with facts and reality. The goals for both sex addicts and sexual anorexics is to learn to have healthy sex and get emotional needs met in direct ways, and to set healthy boundaries. This is an issue that requires ongoing treatment in planned stages with the end goal of autonomy, independence, and improved social relationships.
The concept of "sexual anorexia" was first mentioned by psychologist Nathan Hare in 1975, in an unpublished dissertation submitted in partial fulfillment for a Ph.D. at the California School of Professional Psychology in San Francisco. Ellen Goodman, the nationally syndicated columnist, revealed psychiatrist Sylvia Kaplan's usage of the concept in 1981; which was quickly noted in the editor's "Notes" in the journal "Black Male/Female Relationships." A book by psychologist Patrick Carnes called "Sexual Anorexia" was published in 1997. Hare's Ph.D. dissertation on "Black Male-Female Relations" (1975) as well as the now defunct journal called "Black Male/Female Relationships" (1979-1982) are available in University Microfilms, from the University of Michigan. See also Nathan and Julia Hare, "Sexual Anorexia," Crisis in Black Sexual Politics, published in 1989 by The Black Think Tank, San Francisco,pp. 137-140, ISBN 0-9613086-2. Julia Hare has also used it in a book, "The Sexual and Political Anorexia of the Black Woman" (June, 2008, ISBN 0-981-7999-09).
Further reading
|url= |accessdate=2006-11-27 |doi=10.1080/10720169808402338 }} |url= |accessdate=2006-11-27|doi=10.1080/10720160390230682 }}External links
- What is sex anorexia? on sexhelp.com