You can't give up on Charity, Miguel. Would Leonardo give up on Kate? Would Ross give up on Rachel? Would Bo give up on Hope?

[Kay has second thoughts about being good] Miguel is going to be mine no matter what I have to do! Charity, be damned! As God as my witness, I'll never be good again!

Esme? What kind of name is that? Forgot who I was talking to. To someone named Fancy, Esme actually sounds kind of normal.

Is Ethan really my son? I'm not going to rest until I know for sure. Maybe there's a clue on the Internet.

It's a sad day in America when the Cranes can't subvert government policy.

[Luis and Sam have again accused Alistair of a crime with no proof] You'll have to excuse me. I've heard all of this empty huffing and puffing before.

[to Alistair] Grampy! (repeated line)

[to Ivy] Hi, Mummy! I'm home!

It's hard getting a license when you're underage. Plus, I kept forgetting that the states have speed limits. In parts of Europe they don't, you know.

[Fancy comes to a realization after Alistair's marriage to Theresa] Oh, my God. You're my step-grandmother!"