Jack Handey - AbsoluteAstronomy.com

Overview

Jack Handey is an American

United States

The United States of America is a federal constitutional republic comprising fifty states and a federal district...

humorist. He is best known for his Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey, a large body of surrealistic

Surrealism

Surrealism is a cultural movement that began in the early 1920s, and is best known for the visual artworks and writings of the group members....

one-liner joke

One-liner joke

A one-liner is a joke that is delivered in a single line. A good one-liner is said to be pithy.Comedians and actors use this comedic method as part of their act, e.g...

s, as well as his "Fuzzy Memories" and "My Big Thick Novel" shorts. Although many people assume otherwise, Handey is a real person, not a pen name

Pen name

A pen name, nom de plume, or literary double, is a pseudonym adopted by an author. A pen name may be used to make the author's name more distinctive, to disguise his or her gender, to distance an author from some or all of his or her works, to protect the author from retribution for his or her...

or character.
Handey was born in San Antonio

San Antonio, Texas

San Antonio is the seventh-largest city in the United States of America and the second-largest city within the state of Texas, with a population of 1.33 million. Located in the American Southwest and the south–central part of Texas, the city serves as the seat of Bexar County. In 2011,...

, Texas

Texas

Texas is the second largest U.S. state by both area and population, and the largest state by area in the contiguous United States.The name, based on the Caddo word "Tejas" meaning "friends" or "allies", was applied by the Spanish to the Caddo themselves and to the region of their settlement in...

, in 1949. His family later moved to El Paso, Texas

El Paso, Texas

El Paso, is a city in and the county seat of El Paso County, Texas, United States, and lies in far West Texas. In the 2010 census, the city had a population of 649,121. It is the sixth largest city in Texas and the 19th largest city in the United States...

, where Handey attended Eastwood High School

Eastwood High School (El Paso, Texas)

Eastwood High School is a high school in the city of El Paso, Texas, USA.-History:Eastwood High School, "Home of El Paso's Finest," is located in the city of El Paso, Texas. Eastwood had its first graduating senior class in 1965; today Eastwood High School has 400+ graduates annually...

(where he was editor of Sabre, the school newspaper) and the University of Texas at El Paso

University of Texas at El Paso

The University of Texas at El Paso is a four-year state university, and is a component institution of the University of Texas System. Its campus is located on the bank of the Rio Grande in El Paso, Texas. The school was founded in 1914 as The Texas State School of Mines and Metallurgy,...

.

Handey's earliest writing job was for a newspaper, the San Antonio Express-News
San Antonio Express-News
The San Antonio Express-News is the daily newspaper of San Antonio, Texas. It is ranked as the third-largest daily newspaper in the state of Texas in terms of circulation, and is one of the leading news sources of South Texas, with offices in Austin, Brownsville, Laredo, and Mexico City...

.

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Quotations

If a kid asks where rain comes from, I think a cute thing to tell him is "God is crying." And if he asks why God is crying, another cute thing to tell him is "Probably because of something you did."

Deep Thoughts (1992), Berkley Publishing Group, ISBN 0-425-13365-6.

It takes a big man to cry, but it takes a bigger man to laugh at that man.

Deep Thoughts (1992), Berkley Publishing Group, ISBN 0-425-13365-6.

Maybe in order to understand mankind, we have to look at the word itself. Basically, it's made up of two separate words — "mank" and "ind." What do these words mean? It's a mystery, and that's why so is mankind.

Deeper Thoughts: All New, All Crispy (1993), Hyperion, ISBN 1-56282-840-1.

I guess we were kinda poor when we were kids, but we didn't know it. That's because my dad always refused to let us look at the family's financial records.

Fuzzy Memories (1996), Andrews McMeel Publishing, ISBN 0-8362-1040-9.

I can picture in my mind a world without war, a world without hate. And I can picture us attacking that world because they'd never expect it.

Deep Thoughts (1992), Berkley Publishing Group, ISBN 0-425-13365-6.

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