The world of the heterosexual is a sick and boring life.

Queers are just better. I'd be so proud if you was a fag.

Fucker! Pig fucker! Hetero! Filthy hetero stink-shit!

[to Taffy] And remember, my offer still stands. If you get tired of being a Hare Krishna, you come live with me and be a lesbian!

Where did you get this crap, Taffy? I told you to spend that money I gave you on a cute outfit, but ooooh-noooo! As soon as my back is turned, you run right out and spend it on props for your morbid little games! Well, I want it cleaned up pronto! We're having guests for dinner and I want you looking as P-R-E-T-T-Y as humanly possible!

You're a pain, Taffy. A pain in my big asshole!

I'm afraid I'm going to have to break the news to you, but I've thrown Gator out and started divorce proceedings. I don't want to seem overly bitter, but I want you to destroy all of his belongings.

Davenport. Dawn Davenport! I'm a thief and a shitkicker, and, uh, I'd like to be famous.

I've DONE everything a mother can do: I've locked her in her room, I've beat her with the car aerial. Nothing changes her. It's HARD being a loving mother!

Writing a book, hippie? Why don't you go listen to some folk music and give me a break!