Death Buys a Timeshare
Encyclopedia
"Death Buys a Timeshare" is the 174th episode in the Fox animated
situation comedy
Situation comedy
A situation comedy, often shortened to sitcom, is a genre of comedy that features characters sharing the same common environment, such as a home or workplace, accompanied with jokes as part of the dialogue...

 series King of the Hill
King of the Hill
King of the Hill is an American animated dramedy series created by Mike Judge and Greg Daniels, that ran from January 12, 1997, to May 6, 2010, on Fox network. It centers on the Hills, a working-class Methodist family in the fictional small town of Arlen, Texas...

and was the 3rd episode broadcast in the 9th season. The episode's title is a play on the film Death Takes a Holiday
Death Takes a Holiday
Death Takes a Holiday is a 1934 romantic drama starring Fredric March, Evelyn Venable and Guy Standing, based on the Italian play La Morte in Vacanze by Alberto Casella.-Synopsis:...

. This episode is rated TV-PG V.

Plot

Cotton's old war buddy Topsy passes away and leaves Cotton his estate, and Cotton wants to use the money to honor Topsy's memory by "hell-raising and girl-chasing". He picks Bill to be his new friend to help him (christening him Fatty), much to Dale's dismay. Cotton is bored with things to do in Texas, and Bill proposes that they go to Mexico
Mexico
The United Mexican States , commonly known as Mexico , is a federal constitutional republic in North America. It is bordered on the north by the United States; on the south and west by the Pacific Ocean; on the southeast by Guatemala, Belize, and the Caribbean Sea; and on the east by the Gulf of...

 for a "free vacation" during a timeshare
Timeshare
A timeshare is a form of ownership or right to the use of a property, or the term used to describe such properties. These properties are typically resort condominium units, in which multiple parties hold rights to use the property, and each sharer is allotted a period of time in which they may use...

 seminar, and Hank goes along to ensure that the irresponsible Bill doesn't blow any more of Cotton's or his own money.

Meanwhile, since it's one of the hottest days of the year, Dale enlists Peggy and Bobby to infiltrate swimming pool
Swimming pool
A swimming pool, swimming bath, wading pool, or simply a pool, is a container filled with water intended for swimming or water-based recreation. There are many standard sizes; the largest is the Olympic-size swimming pool...

s at houses for sale to cool off. The first pool that Dale finds is being shown to potential buyers, so they vow to find another to stay cool. In Mexico, Rich the salesman shows off a portrait of the timeshare club's founder, an adventurer named O'Kelly, and gets his staff to work trying to sell the timeshares. Hank is resistant, and narrowly prevents Bill from buying, but Cotton purchases one based on O'Kelly's supposed exploits. Hank is upset, but learns that Cotton has 12 hours to change his mind about his purchase which includes, among other things, access to O'Kelly's private yacht whose private chef once worked for Cantinflas
Cantinflas
Fortino Mario Alfonso Moreno Reyes , was a Mexican comic film actor, producer, and screenwriter known professionally as Cantinflas. He often portrayed impoverished campesinos or a peasant of pelado origin...

. Cotton pronounces Cantinflas, ˈkɛnːtɪnˌflæs.

Dale, Peggy and Bobby move on to a fancier pool, only to discover it's protected by vicious guard dogs. Hank tries to talk Cotton out of the membership, explaining that not only is it a bad investment, but that Americans can't even own land in Mexico, but Cotton is enthralled by the attention and perks and refuses to listen. Bill questions Rich about the ownership law, raising some doubts with Cotton, but Rich quickly distracts him by offering a special membership in O'Kelly's exclusive "El Presidente circle," and has Bill removed by security.

Dale tries to get them into one last pool, by pretending to be the new neighbors, to no avail. With only a few hours remaining, Hank enlists Bill to distract security, taking a beating while Hank goes to see Rich. Hank convinces him that Cotton only had money once and is too poor to continue paying dues and fees, and Rich tears up the contract. He tries to tell Cotton, but ends up realizing that the attention is making Cotton feel important again since all his friends died. When the American consulate is no help, Bill distracts security again and Hank reluctantly asks Rich to let Cotton on the El Presidente yacht
Yacht
A yacht is a recreational boat or ship. The term originated from the Dutch Jacht meaning "hunt". It was originally defined as a light fast sailing vessel used by the Dutch navy to pursue pirates and other transgressors around and into the shallow waters of the Low Countries...

, which Rich agrees to - as long as Hank buys a week at the resort. Hank, Cotton, and a badly beaten Bill admire the Mexican view, and Cotton believes that Topsy would be proud.

Quotes

  • Timeshare salesman': You seem like the kind of man who'd really enjoy O'Kelly's company. He's an adventurer, explorer-
Cotton: Yeah, yeah, smells like strawberries, pees ginger beer. Don't care.

  • 'Dale (after being chased by ferocious guard dogs): Last time I was here, they were puppies! Now, which one of you is 'Scamp'?

  • Bill: [trying to cause a diversion] I am going to go and eat some of O'Kelly's penguin
    Penguin
    Penguins are a group of aquatic, flightless birds living almost exclusively in the southern hemisphere, especially in Antarctica. Highly adapted for life in the water, penguins have countershaded dark and white plumage, and their wings have become flippers...

    s!
    (The timeshare security goons ignore him.)
    Bill (sighing): Americans cannot own land in Mexico! Americans cannot own land in Mexico!
    (The security goons run after him.)

  • Bill: [causing another diversion] I'm off to urinate on the statue of O'Kelly!
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