Dan Quisenberry
Dan Raymond "Quiz" Quisenberry (icon; February 7, 1953 – September 30, 1998) was an American
United States
The United States of America is a federal constitutional republic comprising fifty states and a federal district...

 right-handed relief pitcher
Relief pitcher
A relief pitcher or reliever is a baseball or softball pitcher who enters the game after the starting pitcher is removed due to injury, ineffectiveness, fatigue, ejection, or for other strategic reasons, such as being substituted by a pinch hitter...

 in Major League Baseball
Major League Baseball
Major League Baseball is the highest level of professional baseball in the United States and Canada, consisting of teams that play in the National League and the American League...

 who played primarily for the Kansas City Royals
Kansas City Royals
The Kansas City Royals are a Major League Baseball team based in Kansas City, Missouri. The Royals are a member of the Central Division of Major League Baseball's American League. From 1973 to the present, the Royals have played in Kauffman Stadium...

. Notable for his submarine
Submarine (baseball)
In baseball, a submarine pitch is one in which the ball is released underhand and just above the ground, with the torso bent at a right angle and shoulders tilted so severely that they rotate around a nearly horizontal axis...

-style pitching delivery and his humorous quotes, he led the American League
American League
The American League of Professional Baseball Clubs, or simply the American League , is one of two leagues that make up Major League Baseball in the United States and Canada. It developed from the Western League, a minor league based in the Great Lakes states, which eventually aspired to major...

 in saves
Save (sport)
In baseball, a save is credited to a pitcher who finishes a game for the winning team under certain prescribed circumstances. The number of saves, or percentage of save opportunities successfully converted, is an oft-cited statistic of relief pitchers...

 a record five times (1980, 1982–85), and retired in 1990
1990 in baseball
-Major League Baseball:*World Series: Cincinnati Reds over Oakland Athletics ; José Rijo, MVP*American League Championship Series MVP Dave Stewart*National League Championship Series co-MVPs: Rob Dibble and Randy Myers...

 with 244 saves, then the 6th-highest total in major league history.
Born in Santa Monica, California
Santa Monica, California
Santa Monica is a beachfront city in western Los Angeles County, California, US. Situated on Santa Monica Bay, it is surrounded on three sides by the city of Los Angeles — Pacific Palisades on the northwest, Brentwood on the north, West Los Angeles on the northeast, Mar Vista on the east, and...

, Quisenberry signed with the Royals as an amateur free agent
Free agent
In professional sports, a free agent is a player whose contract with a team has expired and who is thus eligible to sign with another club or franchise....

 in 1975
1975 in baseball
-Major League Baseball:*World Series: Cincinnati Reds over Boston Red Sox ; Pete Rose, MVP*All-Star Game, July 15 at County Stadium: National League, 6-3; Bill Madlock and Jon Matlack, MVPs-Other champions:...

, and was considered a marginal prospect.

I have seen the future, and it looks a lot like the present.

[My lifetime contract] has options through the year 2020, or until the last Rocky movie is made.

A manager uses a relief pitcher like a six shooter -- he fires until it's empty, then takes the gun and throws it at the villain.

Natural grass is a wonderful thing for little bugs and sinker-ball pitchers.

Our fielders have to catch a lot of balls, or at least deflect them to someone who can.

I found a delivery in my flaw.