• Joe "paddled in to Mattawa
  Mattawa, Ontario
  Mattawa is a town in northeastern Ontario, Canada, at the confluence of the Mattawa and Ottawa Rivers in Nipissing District. Mattawa means "Meeting of the Waters" in Ojibwa...
  
   all the way from Ottawa
  Ottawa
  Ottawa is the capital of Canada, the second largest city in the Province of Ontario, and the fourth largest city in the country. The city is located on the south bank of the Ottawa River in the eastern portion of Southern Ontario...
  
   in just one day".
• Joe had a "pet frog who was bigger than a horse, and barked like a dog."
• Mississippi Lake was formed as a result of sweat dripping off his face, as the citizens of Carleton Place
  Carleton Place, Ontario
  Carleton Place is a town in the eastern portion of Eastern Ontario, Canada, in Lanark County, about west of downtown Ottawa. It is located at the crossroads of Highway 15 and Highway 7, halfway between the towns of Perth, Almonte, Smiths Falls, and the nation's capital, Ottawa...
  
   can attest to.
• Joe portage
  Portage
  Portage or portaging refers to the practice of carrying watercraft or cargo over land to avoid river obstacles, or between two bodies of water. A place where this carrying occurs is also called a portage; a person doing the carrying is called a porter.The English word portage is derived from the...
  
  d from Gatineau to Kemptville
  Kemptville, Ontario
  Kemptville is a community located in the Municipality of North Grenville in Southern Ontario, Canada in the northernmost part of the United Counties of Leeds and Grenville...
  
  , to see his girlfriend, and "he was back and forth so many times to see that gal, the path he wore became the Rideau Canal
  Rideau Canal
  The Rideau Canal , also known as the Rideau Waterway, connects the city of Ottawa, Ontario, Canada on the Ottawa River to the city of Kingston, Ontario on Lake Ontario. The canal was opened in 1832 as a precaution in case of war with the United States and is still in use today, with most of its...
  
  ."
• He "put out a forest fire halfway between Renfrew
  Renfrew, Ontario
  Renfrew, Ontario, Canada, is a town on the Bonnechere River in Renfrew County. Located one hour west of Ottawa in Eastern Ontario, Renfrew is the third largest town in the county after Petawawa and Pembroke. The town is a small transportation hub connecting Ontario Highway 60 and Highway 132 with...
  
   and old Arnprior
  Arnprior, Ontario
  Arnprior is a town in Renfrew County, in the eastern portion of Southern Ontario, Canada. It is located at the mouth of the Madawaska River, as it enters the Ottawa River in the Ottawa Valley...
  
  . He was 50 miles away, down around Smiths Falls
  Smiths Falls, Ontario
  Smiths Falls is a town in Eastern Ontario, Canada. It is in the census division for Lanark County, but is considered a separated town and does not participate in county government...
  
  , when he drowned out the fire with five spitballs."
• He "jumped in the Calabogie Lake real fast and swam both ways to catch a cross eyed bass, but he threw it to the ground and said "I can't eat that," so he covered it up with Mount St. Pat."
• After drinking a bucket of gin
  Gin
  Gin is a spirit which derives its predominant flavour from juniper berries . Although several different styles of gin have existed since its origins, it is broadly differentiated into two basic legal categories...
  
  , Joe "beat the living tar out of 29 men and high above the ceiling of the Pembroke
  Pembroke, Ontario
  Pembroke is a city in the province of Ontario, Canada, at the confluence of the Muskrat River and the Ottawa River in the Ottawa Valley...
  
   pub, there's 29 boot marks, and they're signed 'with love.'" This is a reference to the Pembroke Hotel, a favourite of Stompin' Tom.

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