Sneaker Madness

• Speaker Woman: I know that ya'll are aware that today marks the end of our summer program. Which means the pool will be closing. Which means no more swimming... [Two men pull a plug out of the pool which causes the water to go through the drain]

Dirty: Yeah, my mama says for me to leave my mark on the world. Ha ha! This is baller!

Speaker Woman: ...And no more free lunches. [A woman takes away a sandwich that Slim was eating, and then slaps the back of his head causing a piece of the sandwich to fall out of his mouth]

Slim: Ow! Talk about slapping the taste out of somebody's mouth.

Speaker Woman: In parting, I hope ya'll had a very fun and lovely summer. But to put it to you short and simple, ya'll don't have to go home, but you got to get the heck up out of here!!! Now take your little greedy behinds home with your parents!!! I'M TIRED OF WATCHING OVER YA'LL!!!! I GOT MY OWN KIDS, SHOOT!!!!

• D-Roc: (Rapping) Yeah. Hear me. Hear me. My flow is slow. What do you know? I want those Air Jareds. I ain't got the-- I ain't got the..... What rhymes with "know"? [A unseen man throws a potato at D-Roc]

Unseen Man: IT'S "DOUGH", STUPID!!!

• Speaker Woman: Attention shoppers and window shoppers. Please quiet your bratty children and listen to this announcement. Ladies, please don't try to fit your BIG OL' FOOT in a size 6 when you really are a man's 12. And to all you CHEAP men. Please don't sample perfume alone in the fragrance department. Instead, I suggest you go home, and wash yo' behinds!! 'Cause chopped onions and Old Spice don't mix. Now I gots to go. Because I need to return this dress that I'm wearing before the store closes. I'M THROUGH!!! [Drops microphone as we hear her walking off]

• Big Kid: (Talking to D-Roc) Look here, punk. Your sister accused me of cutting the line. And that makes me feel... Pain. And when I feel pain, it makes me want to fight.

D-Roc: (Nervously) Oh, you thought she said "you cut the line". What she acctually said is... "We cut the price in half, READ the sign! [Draws on the sign to make the price half-off]

Big Kid: Oh, I can't read that sign from way up here. [He litteraly punches D-Roc's face off] Now look what you made me do! (Crying) Mama!!! (Runs away while crying) I punched that boy's face off, Mama!!!

Big Kid's Mom: BOY, YOU ALWAYS STARTIN' TROUBLE!!!! COME HERE AND MAKE YOUR MAMA A CHEESE SANDWICH!!!!

Miracle On D-Roc's Street

• D-Roc: (Rapping) I'm buildin' a snowman with my new G-Bot toy. His name is Mega-G, and he's full of Christmas joy. 'Cause it's Christmas time. I'm busting Christmas rhymes with a flow so slick, I can stop on a-- Quarter? [The unseen man throws a snowball at him]

Unseen Man: IT'S "DIME", STUPID!!!

• Big Kid: (To D-Roc) I hear you gonna kick my butt.

D-Roc: (Nervously) No. No, no, no. Of course not. You got it all wrong. I didn't say I would "kick your butt", I said "we should let that nice kid cut"!

Big Kid: Are you calling me a liar? 'Cause I don't like liars. My mama lied to me about the Tooth Fairy. So I knocked out all my teeth. Then she lost her job, and didn't leave me no money. So I was angry and toothless. And when I get toothless, I fight. [He litteraly punches D- Roc's skeleton out of his skin] (Runs away while crying) MAMAAAAA!!!!! THIS BOY MADE ME PUNCH HIS FLESH OFF, MAMA!!!!!!!

• Speaker Woman: Attention shoppers and shoplifters. The mall will be closing in 3 hours. And they ain't paying me no overtime, so you gots to go. And to all you parents, please have your children ask Santa for toys, and toys only. If it's a doll, or a train set, Santa will get it. But braces, medical insurance, and bunk beds is something YOU should go buy. Now I gots to go. So merry Christmas, happy hermonicas (Haunnakah), and Felix Trevidez (Feliz Navidad: Spansh for "Merry Christmas"). I'M THROUGH!!!! [Drops the microphone as we here her walking off]