The Girl Next Door Quotations

The Girl Next Door is a 2004 film that stars Emile Hirsch and Elisha Cuthbert. This movie is about an ambitious high school senior, Matthew Kidman (Hirsch), who dreams of a career in politics. He is overjoyed to discover that his new neighbor, 19-year-old Danielle (Cuthbert), is absolutely beautiful, and they fall head over heels in love.

Directed by Luke Greenfield. Written by David Wagner, Brent Goldberg, and Stuart Blumberg

Matt never saw her coming... but all his friends had! (Taglines)

Matthew Kidman

Matthew: [while giving Danielle a crumpled paper] I just want you to know that I know who you really are, and you're better than this. [Danielle uncrumples the paper and it is the drawing she made of the girl with lipstick at the table with Matthew.]

Matthew: [after Kelly gives him ectasy] Oh my God, am I gonna die?!?

Matthew: Moral fiber. So, what is moral fiber? It's funny, I used to think it was always telling the truth, doing good deeds, basically [mumbling] being a fucking boy scout. But lately I've been seeing it differently. Now I think moral fiber's about finding that one thing you really care about. That one special thing that means more to you than anything else in the world. And when you find her, you fight for her. You risk it all, you put her in front of everything, your future, your life, all of it. And maybe the stuff you do to help her isn't so clean. You know what? It doesn't matter. Because in your heart you know, that the juice is worth the squeeze. That's what moral fiber's all about.
Matthew: Matthew Kidman. I will always remember... The three legs of the tripod. My business partner. My student advisor. The next Einstein. Eli's calling card. Klitz's big debut. My own scholarship to Georgetown. And of course, I'll never forget the girl next door. As for me, I'm just going with it.

Danielle

Danielle: [repeated line] What's the craziest thing you've ever done lately?
Danielle: Just go with it.
Danielle: Hi, I'm all wet. Can I come in?

Eli

Eli: Fine! Goddammit Matt! I swear to God if you don't fuck her, I'll kill myself! Matt! Please! Please! Matt! FUCK HER FOR ME! FOR ME!
Eli: God, I just wanna bang hot chicks!
Eli: I just gotta fuck something.
Eli: Minions!

Kelly

[When some high school girls like the idea that Kelly has weed]

Kelly: Hey, you know who's got the killer bud?

[hits Klitz]

Kelly: This fucker right here.

[Kelly gives Klitz a Ziplock bag filled with Marijuana and suddenly the girls are interested in him]

Kelly: You wanna be president? Lemme tell you the first rule of politics; Always know if the juice is worth the squeeze. You know what that means? It means you don't steal my girl unless you're ready to accept the consequences.
[Upon observing the cheerleaders and football players] Man, there is some talent here. You get those girls together with those assbags right there and shoot 'em humping at, like, a football game or at a prom, that video would sell - Fuck, I'm good! How do I get these ideas? It's like a gift, you know? It's like I can't control it.

Other

Hugo Posh's Parrot: Cradle the balls!
April: [to Klitz] I know this isn't professional, but I think you're really cute.

Dialogue

Eli: Okay, you know what the three of us are? We're a tripod.

Klitz: A tripod?

Eli: Yes, a tripod. Which means that if you knock out one of our legs, WE-ALL-FALL!

[repeated line]

Matthew: It's not funny.

Danielle: It's a little funny.

[during watching porn movie]

Klitz: - Dude, I'm kind of uncomfortable watching this with you.

Eli: Shh... Dude, learn to like it.

Mr. Peterson: [while both receiving lap dances] So, what was the scholarship for?

Matthew: Moral fiber.

Eli: Dude, don't mess this up.

Matthew: Mess what up?

Eli: Matt, she's a porn star! Okay? Take her to a motel room and bang her like a beast!

Matthew: Eli, I like this girl.

Eli: And you can still like her with your penis inside her. Matthew, I tell you that you're going to regret this. What would JFK do? You know he'd tap that ass.

Matthew: Eli, you're never going to see her again.

Eli: Oh, you know what? Fine!

Matthew: Fine!

Eli: Fine! Goddammit Matt! I swear to God if you don't fuck her, I'll kill myself! Matt! Please! Please! Matt! Fuck her for me! For me!

Matthew: Why are you doing this?

Danielle: What?

Matthew: This.

Danielle: Isn't that what you want? To fuck a porn star in a cheap motel room? So this is what you really think of me.

Matthew: Danielle, wait. I'm sorry.

Danielle: Let me guess. Someone showed you a tape, and you thought, "What the hell. She does it for a living."

Danielle: Right?

Matthew: Eli told me to do it.

Danielle: Oh, now that's a mature response.

Matthew: Why didn't you just tell me?

Danielle: Because I didn't want to, okay? Because I loved the way you looked at me.

Danielle: God, do you have any idea how... Forget it.

Matthew: Hold on.

Danielle: Fuck you.

Matthew: Why didn't you just tell me?

Danielle: Because I didn't want to! Because I loved the way you looked at me. You don't understand how hard...

[walks away]

Matthew: Wait!

Danielle: [shouts] Fuck you.

Eli: Dude!

Matthew: I know.

Klitz: Dude!

Matthew: I know.

Kelly: Sometimes in life if you wanna do something good, you gotta do something bad.

Matthew: Yeah, but this is breaking and entering.

Kelly: This is politics.

Mrs. Kidman: [referring to Eli & Klitz's porn star dates] Eli, do those girls go to your school?

Eli: Actually, no, Mrs. Kidman, they're porn stars.

[Mrs. Kidman laughs dismisingly]

Ferrari: I know I lost my virginity at prom. How about you? When did you lose your virginity?

April: When I was ten.

Ferrari: Okay, moving on...

Danielle: Thank you.

Matthew: For what?

Danielle: I never went to prom.

Film School Student: Why'd you decide to skip film school? Don't you think you're a little young?

Eli: Dude, this suit costs more than your mom's car. Next quest-

Film School Student: You didn't answer m-

Eli: SHUT THE FUCK UP! Next question.

Cast

Emile Hirsch — Matthew Kidman
Elisha Cuthbert — Danielle/Athena
Timothy Olyphant — Kelly
James Remar — Hugo Posh
Chris Marquette — Eli
Paul Dano — Klitz
Timothy Bottoms — Mr. Kidman
Donna Bullock — Mrs. Kidman
Nicholas Downs — Bob
Sung Hi Lee — Ferrari
Amanda Swisten — April