Kung Fu Hustle Quotations

Kung Fu Hustle is a 2005 film about two hapless conmen on the streets of 1940s Shanghai who pretend to be the members of the ruthless Axe Gang. Their extortion scheme fails when the victims fight back, and the plot thickens when the real Axe Gang shows up. Meanwhile, the run-down tenement that is being attacked, the Pig Sty, turns out to count amongst its residents superhuman kung-fu fighters.

Directed by Stephen Chow. Written by Tsang Kan Cheong, Stephen Chow, Xin Huo and Chan Man Keung

Sing

[To ice cream vendor] What're you looking at? Never seen an ice cream thief before? [Runs away without paying, laughing maniacally]

[Shouting while puncturing football] No more soccer!

Landlady

How come you became righteous? Have you anything to say? [Sing draws a stick of candy on the ground with his blood] I can't read it, it's not in Chinese!

[To tailor] What's with the red underwear?

You may know kung fu... but you're still a fairy.

[on Sing's new kung fu skills] If he studies hard, he could be a doctor or a lawyer. [pause] More likely a stuntman.

The Beast

In the world of kung fu, speed defines the winner.

Don't get me wrong! I only want to kill you, or be killed by you.
It's just a title.(Refering to the name The Beast)
This doesn't make any sense at all.

Dialogue

Brother Sum: Ever killed anyone?

Sing: I've always thought about it.

Bone: You gave him your life savings?

Sing: Yes. I was saving to become a doctor or lawyer... but this was world peace.

Sing: [feelingly] I realized then that good guys never win. I want to be bad. I want to be a ruthless killer!

Bone: [looks up] Ice cream!

[He leaves]

Sing: Where?

[He follows]

Bone: Memories can be painful. To forget may be a blessing!

Sing: [amazed] I never knew you were so deep.

Axe Gang Advisor: So that makes you the best killers in circulation, right?

Harpist #1: In actuality, we are just a pair of street musicians.

Barber: Why don't you train us to be top fighters... and we'll avenge them!

Landlady: Becoming a top fighter takes time, unless you're a natural-born kung-fu genius, and they're 1 in a million.

Barber: [Doing martial arts routine] It's obvious I'm the one!

Landlady: [Punches him in the face, knocking him to the floor] Don't think so.

The Beast: What awesome kung fu was that?

Sing: You wanna learn? I will teach you!

Donut: [in English] What are you prepared to do?

Landlord: We can't understand what you're saying!

Taglines

A new comedy unlike anything you have seen before

So many gangsters... so little time

From walking disaster to kung fu master

Cast

Stephen Chow - Sing
Chi Chung Lam - Bone
Qiu Yuen - Landlady
Wah Yuen - Landlord
Zhi Hua Dong - Donut
Zhi Hua Dong - The Beast
Kwok Kuen Chan - Brother Sum
Kai Man Tin - Axe Gang Advisor