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D.E.B.S.
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D.E.B.S. is a 2004 spy-film spoof about plaid-skirted schoolgirls who are groomed by a secret government agency to become the newest members of the elite national-defense group, D.E.B.S. (Discipline, Energy, Beauty, and Strength).
Written and directed by Angela Robinson.

They're crime-fighting hotties with killer bodies. Taglines


Lucy Diamond

  • Well, their poster child doesn't know it yet, but she's into me.

  • I guess I'll see you around...'same bat time' or whatever.

Amy Bradshaw

  • [to Janet] Remember when you got drunk and nearly got the chancellor of Bulgaria killed? I covered for you!

  • [to Lucy] I'm here because I feel more like me when I'm with you, than I do when I'm with me.

  • I think love should be irresistible, like a drug, you know? I think when it happens you should just not be able to help yourself. I just - I wanted... more.

Others

  • Dominique: You're not as boring as I thought. But you're not as bright, either.

  • Mr Phipps: You are a perfect liar.

  • Scud: Knock 'em dead... but not really.

  • Janet: Have you seen my gun?

  • Ms. Petrie: This is not the Girl Scouts, this is espionage!

Dialogue

Dominique: You need to put it here. Don't be an idiot for once.
Janet: You need to speak French or English. Frenglish is not a language.


Max: And what did I say to you the very first day of Academy?
Amy: "That's my bunk, bitch."
Max: Okay, after I said that.


Scud: Just promise me you'll be open.
Lucy: Open to what?
Scud: Open to love.


Lucy: [on an awkward blind date] So, you're an assassin.
Ninotchka: Da.
Lucy: How's that work?
Ninotchka: It's mostly freelance.


Lucy: [clutching stomach] I just, I'm feeling really ill. It's my stomach. I, um, I think I have food poisoning.
Ninotchka: Are you blowing me?
Lucy: What?
Ninotchka: Off. Are you blowing me off?


Amy: '[looking at Lucy through binoculars] Wow. Lucy Diamond, she's...
Max: What?
Amy: Real.


Lucy: [after Amy refuses to go out with her] Why not?
Amy: [still with her weapon trained on Lucy] Like a zillion reasons!
[Lucy kicks the weapon pointed at her away, then snatches it away, and points it at Amy]
Lucy: Now you have to come with me. [giggles]


Janet: I have the sweater she's wearing, but in taupe.
Amy: Really? Where did you get it?
Janet: Target.
Amy: No way.
Dominique: Silence!
Janet: [whispering] They also have it in teal.


Lucy: [talking about a girl she met, Amy] Okay, first of all, you are gonna have to swear to me that you are not gonna freak out about this.
Scud: Freak out about what? Why would I freak out?
Lucy: Well, you know, sometimes you can--
Scud: [freaking out] Oh, my God, who is it?


Janet: [watching Amy and Lucy flirt] Correct me if I'm wrong, but your friend seems to be hitting on my friend.
Scud: You're not wrong.
Janet: Yeah, but my friend's not into that.
Scud: [under breath] Right.


Janet: [catching Amy and Lucy in a near kiss] Oh, my God! She almost kissed you! You almost let her!
Scud: [smug] You owe me fifty bucks.


Amy: Nothing happened.
Janet: She was totally going to kiss you. You are so into her!
Amy: I am not!
Janet: You violated a prime directive. Plus, hello, it's a girl. You're so busted!


Janet: They're calling you a hero, when really you're a slut!
Amy: Shut up!
Janet: [lowers voice] A gay slut!
Amy: I'm not gay!


Max: [to Amy] I don't care if you are the Perfect Score.
Janet: [under her breath] Perfect whore!


Max: I can't stop thinking about Lucy Diamond.
Janet: [incredulous] You too?


Lucy: Come with me. Come on, what do you have to lose?
Amy: Everything.


Lucy: I didn't even want to be a criminal. I wanted to be a pirate.
Amy: [laughs] Pirates are criminals.
Lucy: Oh. Whoops.


[Amy fails to unhook Lucy's bra properly during their make-out session]
Lucy: Did you just snap my bra?
Amy: No.
Lucy: Yeah, you did. That hasn't happened to me since sixth grade.
Amy: I was trying to be smooth.


Mrs. Petrie: Annie--
Madeline: Amy.
Mrs. Petrie: Amy, I think you identify with Lucy Diamond. I think she sees your pathos. You've got some dangerous union symbiosis going on. What's that movie with Jodie, and the little dog falls in the well, with the lotion?
Madeline: "Silence of the Lambs".
Mrs. Petrie: You're the lamb, Amy.


Mrs. Petrie: Are you kidding me? We conduct a nationwide manhunt for you and you're boning the suspect? Did you think this was a joke? "Let's divert federal resources and man-hours so I can have my collegiate lesbian fling in style."
Amy: I was doing research.
Mrs. Petrie: I'll bet.


Amy: Do you remember what I said to you the first time we met?
Max: "High-proteins diets are overrated".
Amy: After that.


Lucy: Australia's toast.
Scud: What's your beef with the Australians?
Lucy: I don't like their attitude!


Scud: So, I was wondering if maybe you wanted--
Janet: Yes.
Scud: I didn't ask you anything yet.
Janet: Whatever it is, yes.
Scud: Awesome.


Scud: All right, then. We're going in.
Lucy: What?
Scud: We gots to get her back.


Scud: D.E.B.S. en route, two minutes.
Lucy: Do I look okay?
Scud: [looks annoyed] This is retarded.


Scud: What...the hell?
Janet: I couldn't stop them!
Scud: [pauses] You look nice.
Janet: Thanks.
[pauses]
Janet: What?
Max: [to Janet] What are you doing?
Janet: [to Max] Nothing!
[punches Scud, who falls to the floor, unconscious]
Janet: Sorry!


Max: [referring to Amy] If you break her heart, I will hunt you down and kill you.
Lucy: [smiles] Deal.


Janet: So, where're you going to?
Amy: I think...Barcelona.
Janet: I'll miss you.
[pauses]
Janet: Can I have your room?

Cast

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