There's Something About a War (Desperate Housewives episode)
Encyclopedia
"There's Something About a War" is the 36th episode of the ABC
television series, Desperate Housewives
. The episode was the 13th episode for the show's second season. The episode was written by Kevin Etten
and was directed by Larry Shaw
. It originally aired on Sunday January 22, 2006.
Due to time constraints, the opening credits were cut.
and would like to postpone her pregnancy plans for a while until she has made a final decision. As they argue, Father Crowley announces the return of Sister Mary Bernard who has arrived back in the United States after being gone for two months, to Gabrielle's surprise. Later Carlos tells Sister Mary that Gabrielle will not reconsider her position on a baby. Sister offers to help Carlos by giving him a packet on Catholic annulment
. Carlos gives the brochure to Gabrielle who believes that she cannot be "blackmailed into having a baby". Gabrielle visits Father Crowley in the church and asks if Sister Mary can be transferred. Father Crowley asks Gaby why which leads Gabrielle to complicate matters by saying that Carlos and Sister Mary are having an affair and that in his sleep he murmurs her name. Father Crowley asks if she has serious reasons to think they're having sex together. Thinking a little, she says yes. Father Crowley looks mortified and leaves the confessional. Gabrielle stays in the confessional and confesses to another priest that she lied. The next day, Carlos tells her that Sister Mary is being transferred to Fairbanks, Alaska
and she doesn't know the reason. Gabrielle returns to the church to gloat and say goodbye. As Gabrielle leaves, Sister Mary throws a scrub brush at her which causes a fight. Gabrielle punches Sister and Sister grabs her by the hair. Sister Mary is pushed into candles and her arm catches fire. Gabrielle quickly extinguishes the fire and Sister bites her on the arm. They tumble on the floor and a priest breaks up the fight. School children and Sister Greta watch the fight from a distance. When she arrives home, Carlos yells at Gabrielle about what she has done. The baby discussion then reignites and Gabrielle tells Carlos that she is not "a uterus
in high heels". Carlos accepts Gabrielle's offer to not divorce and Gabrielle tells Carlos she has accepted his offer and wants to have a baby with him.
Susan arrives home from a date with Dr. Ron and asks him to come inside. Dr. Ron hesitates when he still feels as the two are still doctor/patient and not boyfriend and girlfriend. Susan asks him if this relationship is going to work and the doctor assures Susan that he is deeply attracted to her but wants to take it slow. Susan and Dr. Ron kiss and then he leaves. The following day, Susan goes for a check-up with Dr. Ron who informs her that she needs a splenectomy
because of her wandering spleen and that he will be the attending surgeon. A nurse congratulates the doctor since it will be his first time. This causes Susan to hesitate since she would feel much more comfortable with another surgeon and if Dr. Ron does do the surgery it will be the first time he sees her naked. Susan tells Dr. Ron her feelings about this over dinner but this revelation causes his feelings to be hurt and he leaves. Susan visits Dr. Ron the following day to tell him she will not compromise for a man's approval anymore. Dr. Ron tells her that she was completely right about everything and that he sent her an apology note, flowers and wine that afternoon. He adds that he could not possibly be her doctor and recognizes that "they make those rules for good reason". Susan gives a sigh of relief and kisses Dr. Ron.
Lynette gets help with Tom on an advertising project regarding frozen yogurt
. When Lynette tells him that the firm acquired the yogurt account, Tom feels proud seeing as he was one of the minds behind the campaign. Lynette asks if he has anyone to recommend from his old firm seeing as a position is opening. Tom says that he does have someone in mind. Lynette asks who that man is and Tom says his name is Tom Scavo, i. e. himself. Lynette laughs at this seeing as it is a recipe for disaster. Tom thinks that is not the case and that with both their salaries they can afford a high class nanny plus she can take advantage of the new company day care. Lynette does not want this but Tom has his mind made up. Surprisingly, Tom shows up on an interview as "Tom Cavos" and immediately wins over the support of Lynette's boss Ed. Lynette says that she'll agree to see Tom working if he can never again feel resentment over Lynette against his former promotion and that she will be forgiven. Tom tells her that he already has. Tom kisses Lynette and thanks her for the job.
When Bree finds Matthew Applewhite in Danielle's bedroom, this causes sadness and anger from Danielle when Bree walks the both of them to Betty's. Betty slaps Matthew. Later, Bree finds Danielle crying in her room about how Bree is destroying her life now that Bree's life is over. Bree tries to make everything better by buying pizza and agrees to let Danielle date Matthew as long as it's okay with Betty. The following day, Bree visits Betty who thinks that they should not interfere with Danielle and Matthew's relationship but when Bree discovers Caleb lurking in the upstairs window she panics and tells Betty she has to leave. Remembering that she has seen the man's face before from both the newspaper and Gabrielle's break in she alerts her friends that she has serious dirt on the Applewhites. Danielle overhears this and tells Matthew. They exchange stories which include how Bree covered up Andrew's hit and run accident involving Mama Solis. Before the poker game, Betty visits Bree to warn her that if she breathes a word about Caleb's existence she will inform the Solises and the police about Andrew's crime. Bree is forced to lie to her friends and tell them that Betty is a master card player and will be joining their weekly game.
), Andrew Van De Kamp (Shawn Pyfrom
), Paul Young (Mark Moses
), Zach Young (Cody Kasch
), Preston Scavo (Brent Kinsman), and Porter Scavo (Shane Kinsman
) do not appear in this episode.
's musical A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum
.
American Broadcasting Company
The American Broadcasting Company is an American commercial broadcasting television network. Created in 1943 from the former NBC Blue radio network, ABC is owned by The Walt Disney Company and is part of Disney-ABC Television Group. Its first broadcast on television was in 1948...
television series, Desperate Housewives
Desperate Housewives
Desperate Housewives is an American television comedy-drama series created by Marc Cherry and produced by ABC Studios and Cherry Productions. Executive producer Cherry serves as Showrunner. Other executive producers since the fourth season include Marc Cherry, Bob Daily, George W...
. The episode was the 13th episode for the show's second season. The episode was written by Kevin Etten
Kevin Etten
Kevin Etten is an American screenwriter and television producer.Beginning as a writer for The Late Show with David Letterman, Etten has since been a part of the crews of the dramedies Ed and Desperate Housewives, the latter for which he also served as a producer.In 2011, Etten began as executive...
and was directed by Larry Shaw
Larry Shaw (director)
Larry Shaw is an American film and television director.He is currently a regular director on the ABC television series, Desperate Housewives, where he also serves as a co-executive producer for the show...
. It originally aired on Sunday January 22, 2006.
Due to time constraints, the opening credits were cut.
Plot
At church, Gabrielle quietly plays with a baby which causes Carlos to ask her if she has reconsidered having a baby. Gabrielle reminds him that she has just suffered a miscarriageMiscarriage
Miscarriage or spontaneous abortion is the spontaneous end of a pregnancy at a stage where the embryo or fetus is incapable of surviving independently, generally defined in humans at prior to 20 weeks of gestation...
and would like to postpone her pregnancy plans for a while until she has made a final decision. As they argue, Father Crowley announces the return of Sister Mary Bernard who has arrived back in the United States after being gone for two months, to Gabrielle's surprise. Later Carlos tells Sister Mary that Gabrielle will not reconsider her position on a baby. Sister offers to help Carlos by giving him a packet on Catholic annulment
Annulment
Annulment is a legal procedure for declaring a marriage null and void. Unlike divorce, it is usually retroactive, meaning that an annulled marriage is considered to be invalid from the beginning almost as if it had never taken place...
. Carlos gives the brochure to Gabrielle who believes that she cannot be "blackmailed into having a baby". Gabrielle visits Father Crowley in the church and asks if Sister Mary can be transferred. Father Crowley asks Gaby why which leads Gabrielle to complicate matters by saying that Carlos and Sister Mary are having an affair and that in his sleep he murmurs her name. Father Crowley asks if she has serious reasons to think they're having sex together. Thinking a little, she says yes. Father Crowley looks mortified and leaves the confessional. Gabrielle stays in the confessional and confesses to another priest that she lied. The next day, Carlos tells her that Sister Mary is being transferred to Fairbanks, Alaska
Fairbanks, Alaska
Fairbanks is a home rule city in and the borough seat of the Fairbanks North Star Borough in the U.S. state of Alaska.Fairbanks is the largest city in the Interior region of Alaska, and second largest in the state behind Anchorage...
and she doesn't know the reason. Gabrielle returns to the church to gloat and say goodbye. As Gabrielle leaves, Sister Mary throws a scrub brush at her which causes a fight. Gabrielle punches Sister and Sister grabs her by the hair. Sister Mary is pushed into candles and her arm catches fire. Gabrielle quickly extinguishes the fire and Sister bites her on the arm. They tumble on the floor and a priest breaks up the fight. School children and Sister Greta watch the fight from a distance. When she arrives home, Carlos yells at Gabrielle about what she has done. The baby discussion then reignites and Gabrielle tells Carlos that she is not "a uterus
Uterus
The uterus or womb is a major female hormone-responsive reproductive sex organ of most mammals including humans. One end, the cervix, opens into the vagina, while the other is connected to one or both fallopian tubes, depending on the species...
in high heels". Carlos accepts Gabrielle's offer to not divorce and Gabrielle tells Carlos she has accepted his offer and wants to have a baby with him.
Susan arrives home from a date with Dr. Ron and asks him to come inside. Dr. Ron hesitates when he still feels as the two are still doctor/patient and not boyfriend and girlfriend. Susan asks him if this relationship is going to work and the doctor assures Susan that he is deeply attracted to her but wants to take it slow. Susan and Dr. Ron kiss and then he leaves. The following day, Susan goes for a check-up with Dr. Ron who informs her that she needs a splenectomy
Splenectomy
A splenectomy is a surgical procedure that partially or completely removes the spleen.-Indications:The spleen, similar in structure to a large lymph node, acts as a blood filter. Current knowledge of its purpose includes the removal of old red blood cells and platelets, and the detection and fight...
because of her wandering spleen and that he will be the attending surgeon. A nurse congratulates the doctor since it will be his first time. This causes Susan to hesitate since she would feel much more comfortable with another surgeon and if Dr. Ron does do the surgery it will be the first time he sees her naked. Susan tells Dr. Ron her feelings about this over dinner but this revelation causes his feelings to be hurt and he leaves. Susan visits Dr. Ron the following day to tell him she will not compromise for a man's approval anymore. Dr. Ron tells her that she was completely right about everything and that he sent her an apology note, flowers and wine that afternoon. He adds that he could not possibly be her doctor and recognizes that "they make those rules for good reason". Susan gives a sigh of relief and kisses Dr. Ron.
Lynette gets help with Tom on an advertising project regarding frozen yogurt
Frozen yogurt
Frozen yogurt is a frozen dessert containing yogurt or other dairy products. It is slightly more tart than ice cream, as well as lower in fat...
. When Lynette tells him that the firm acquired the yogurt account, Tom feels proud seeing as he was one of the minds behind the campaign. Lynette asks if he has anyone to recommend from his old firm seeing as a position is opening. Tom says that he does have someone in mind. Lynette asks who that man is and Tom says his name is Tom Scavo, i. e. himself. Lynette laughs at this seeing as it is a recipe for disaster. Tom thinks that is not the case and that with both their salaries they can afford a high class nanny plus she can take advantage of the new company day care. Lynette does not want this but Tom has his mind made up. Surprisingly, Tom shows up on an interview as "Tom Cavos" and immediately wins over the support of Lynette's boss Ed. Lynette says that she'll agree to see Tom working if he can never again feel resentment over Lynette against his former promotion and that she will be forgiven. Tom tells her that he already has. Tom kisses Lynette and thanks her for the job.
When Bree finds Matthew Applewhite in Danielle's bedroom, this causes sadness and anger from Danielle when Bree walks the both of them to Betty's. Betty slaps Matthew. Later, Bree finds Danielle crying in her room about how Bree is destroying her life now that Bree's life is over. Bree tries to make everything better by buying pizza and agrees to let Danielle date Matthew as long as it's okay with Betty. The following day, Bree visits Betty who thinks that they should not interfere with Danielle and Matthew's relationship but when Bree discovers Caleb lurking in the upstairs window she panics and tells Betty she has to leave. Remembering that she has seen the man's face before from both the newspaper and Gabrielle's break in she alerts her friends that she has serious dirt on the Applewhites. Danielle overhears this and tells Matthew. They exchange stories which include how Bree covered up Andrew's hit and run accident involving Mama Solis. Before the poker game, Betty visits Bree to warn her that if she breathes a word about Caleb's existence she will inform the Solises and the police about Andrew's crime. Bree is forced to lie to her friends and tell them that Betty is a master card player and will be joining their weekly game.
Cast
Although credited, Mike Delfino (James DentonJames Denton (actor)
James "Jamie" Thomas Denton, Jr. is an American film and television actor, best known for playing Mike Delfino in the television series Desperate Housewives.-Early life:...
), Andrew Van De Kamp (Shawn Pyfrom
Shawn Pyfrom
Shawn Caminiti Pyfrom is an American actor who has appeared in several television series and movies, and is best known for his portrayal of Andrew Van de Kamp on ABC's Desperate Housewives-Life and career:...
), Paul Young (Mark Moses
Mark Moses
Mark W. Moses is an American actor, known for his roles of Paul Young on Desperate Housewives and Herman "Duck" Phillips on the AMC series Mad Men.-Life and career:...
), Zach Young (Cody Kasch
Cody Kasch
-Early life:Kasch was born of Scottish heritage in Santa Monica, California and raised in Ojai, California on a working ranch until he was nearly fourteen, when he moved to Camarillo, California.-Movie career:...
), Preston Scavo (Brent Kinsman), and Porter Scavo (Shane Kinsman
Shane Kinsman
Shane Kinsman is an American child actor who typically plays a rambunctious twin alongside his identical twin brother Brent. He played Kyle Baker in the 2003 film Cheaper by the Dozen and its 2005 sequel Cheaper by the Dozen 2...
) do not appear in this episode.
Title reference
The episode title is that of the song "There's Something About a War", which was written for, but cut from, Stephen SondheimStephen Sondheim
Stephen Joshua Sondheim is an American composer and lyricist for stage and film. He is the winner of an Academy Award, multiple Tony Awards including the Special Tony Award for Lifetime Achievement in the Theatre, multiple Grammy Awards, a Pulitzer Prize and the Laurence Olivier Award...
's musical A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum
A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum
A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum is a musical with music and lyrics by Stephen Sondheim and book by Burt Shevelove and Larry Gelbart....
.
International titles
- French: La vérité si tu parles (The Truth If You Speak)
- German: Die Kunst des Krieges (The Art of War)
- Italian: Il Fascino Discreto Della Guerra (The Discreet Charm Of The War)
- Hungarian: A hadviselés művészete (The Art of Warfare)
- Polish: Sztuka walki (The Art of Fight)